


Haven

by bl00bl00d



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Disease au, Gen, Plague AU, dystopian au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-17
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2017-12-29 17:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 37
Words: 55,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1008105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bl00bl00d/pseuds/bl00bl00d
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's world is torn apart when he tests positive for the disease that threatens humanity-a disease that turns normal people into violent monsters, with grey skin and yellow eyes. He's quickly taken from his town and dumped in the fenced-in city 'Haven', where all the diseased go to live out their remaining days.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New Start

John Egbert began his new life sitting in the back of an ambulance. It wasn’t much of an ambulance anymore, the stretchers and medical equipment had been taken out, replaced by benches lining the walls. The inside was plain white, the benches hard and uncomfortable. However, it still had a window on the back doors, and through that he could see his hometown rapidly becoming a speck in the distance.

Trying to divert his attention from the fact that he was leaving for the last time, John instead shifted his gaze to his two companions in the modified back of the ambulance. They were sitting across from each other, as close to the door as they could get. Both of their gazes were directed out the window, they hadn’t spoken a word or even paid the slightest attention to John once the ambulance had started moving. He wasn’t even sure if they were male or female, their entire bodies were obscured by bulky, white suits, their faces covered by gas masks which gave them a bug-like appearance.

It didn’t alarm John, though. He was far too used to seeing protective gear, he even had a mask and suit at home hanging in his closet. His dad had even got it custom fit for him so he wouldn’t have to walk around treading on the toes, but none of that mattered now. He would never need to wear one again.

He sighed and banged his head back against the wall, the echo reverberating around the enclosed space. The white-suited guard on the left shifted their weapon slightly. The worst part about the trip, besides the imminent destination, was the boredom. John’s natural instinct was to yell or scream or do anything that would interrupt the ceaseless routine of doing nothing, but common sense told him that it wasn’t the right place to cause mischief. They were on the highway now, in the middle of the desert, and John knew that if he made a fuss they wouldn’t hesitate to chuck him out the back. Death would be slow and painful out here with the only passerbys more modified medical trucks. Where he was going there was food and water. Or at least there was supposed to be.

A while later, after giving up trying to count the amount of dirt specks on the wall opposite him, John tried the window again. The sun was sinking down, his hometown long gone. Along with his school, his friends his dad--John banged his head back against the wall again. He had to stop thinking about that. They told him to forget everything, he didn’t even have a chance to get by.

“It’s easier that way kid, new start, yeah?” The woman had said as she steered him into the back of the truck, when asked why he couldn’t see his dad again. The last glimpse he saw was a crowd of middle schooler's eagerly pressing their faces to the door, trying to see who tested positive. It was a rare occurrence in his school, John had only recalled it one other time. He didn’t know the kid though, just some scrawny sixth grader with a huge mop of hair. John had scanned the faces quickly, hoping for a last glimpse of his best friends, but no use. They wouldn’t have found out it was him until too late, besides, they never tried to look in the testing room, said it was demeaning to the poor kid getting tested.

Poor kid getting tested. That was now all he would be remembered as, the poor sap who got a red light.

The sun dipped all the way below the horizon, the purples and pinks of the desert morphing into plain black. John didn’t know how long they’d been sitting there, his phone and watch had been taken from him. He guessed it had been at least five hours.

Finally, the truck slowed down to a stop. John’s stomach lurched. The realization began to sink in. He was going to Haven. He was going to Haven and he was never coming out.


	2. Close Encounters

The back of the ambulance banged open, and the two guards jumped down, then gestured to John. He stood unsteadily, his legs half-asleep from the long journey. He walked forward and they each grabbed one of his arms, lifting him out the back.

His feet hit dusty gravel, and he looked in the direction they had come. It was flat, grey desert as far as he could see. The only things breaking the flat line of the landscape were a few shrubs dotted here and there. The moon was covered by a thick layer of clouds.

Feeling extremely apprehensive, he slowly swiveled around to face his new home. Haven was a city, in its prime it was a sought-out destination for anyone who wanted to do something with their lives. It housed over a million people and was home to some of the greatest inventors. That’s what it was before the disease anyways. That’s where it’s rumored to have started, but nobody except the government really knows the truth.

Now, it was nothing more than a ruin. The skyline of the city was jagged, the once-tall skyscrapers had chunks worn off, or missing the tops altogether. There were no lights coming from any of the windows. Though a chain-like gate he could see a street, but with no working streetlights it was cloaked in darkness. If he squinted he could just make out movement, shadowy figures creeping silently around. He saw the entrances to several thin alleyways, pitch black. He had a sinking suspicion that the city had become nothing more than a maze.

Suddenly a gust of wind blew from inside, carrying with it an overpowering smell of rot, John almost gagged. It smelled like no one had taken the trash out for years along with other something else that he didn’t want to know the source of. He was well aware that the disease greatly shortened your lifespan, but before this he had assumed that people went in and disposed of the bodies.

Now, however, he was a little unsure.

The entirety of the city was surrounded by walls, huge fifteen foot walls that buzzed with electricity. The only way he could see inside was thorugh the chain-link gate at the front, covered in padlocks. More guards stood outside of that, dressed in all black suits and motionless.

The two guards who had been in the ambulance kept their hands on his shoulders as they steered him forward. One of the guards pointed his weapon through the gate while the other unlocked the huge padlocks. The gate eased forward without a sound, leaving a tiny gap open.

John tried fruitlessly to dig his heels into the ground, his breath was coming quicker, this couldn’t be happening, this couldn’t be happening, this--

CLANG!

The white-suited guards shoved him through the opening and shut the gate. John turned and clung to it, he was inches away from the man closing the padlocks again. Tears were springing to his eyes, his knuckles white.

“Please, let me out! Please, I can’t do this I’m just thirteen you can’t do this!” His plea escalated into almost a shriek. The man raised his head, finished with his task.

“Keep your voice down. Don’t want to attract attention here. Now beat it.”

John ignored him and kept his knuckles wrapped firmly around the metal, trying to look directly into where he hoped the man’s eyes were. The guard sighed and lifted his gun, pointing it at John’s forehead.

“You have ten seconds to get out of my sight, or I’ll kill you now and be done with it. This is for the better, you know. You have a chance to live the rest of your life.”

John was still for three seconds. Then, his fingers slowly unclasped as he stumbled back, turning to face the darkened street. He slowly stepped forward, his legs shaking so hard they threatened to give way.

“I said move!” The guard shouted. John picked up his pace, more scared than he had ever felt in his life. He moved until the darkness completely swallowed him, then collapsed on his knees, his entire body shaking. The tears that had been welling up in his eyes burst forth as he clamped his hands over his mouth, trying not to make a sound. His entire body wracked in sobs as he shuffled backward until he hit a wall, and curled into the smallest ball he could. His glasses dug uncomfortably into his knees, but he didn’t move. He half wanted someone, or something to find him and get it all over with, but he couldn’t bring himself to make noise.

Finally, he raised his head, his eyes beginning to adjust. To his left he could see the gate, a small speck of silvery light. ahead of him he could see the wall of a crumbling brick building, several small alleyway entrances leading into and through it. The street was cracked concrete, covered in old soda bottles and scraps of who-knows-what.  
He took off his glasses, rubbed his eyes, and put them back on. John slowly moved his hands backward and pressed against the wall, pushing himself to a standing position. Suddenly he sensed movement to the right of him. When he squinted he could just see the silhouette of a tall figure with wild hair. They had something short and thick in one hand, like a small baseball bat, and was slowly twirling it around, each twirl bringing it a slow step closer to John.

“Hel--hello?” John stuttered, his voice sounding oddly loud in the silence. The figure said nothing, but stepped closer. John could see eyes now, yellow glowing eyes. John swallowed, telling himself that it was just a side effect of the disease, yellow eyes were what everyone had here. He stepped closer to the figure, trying to see it better. The next things that came into view were teeth, a mouth full of pointed, razor sharp teeth.

A sound drifted to his ears, the person was humming. The tune was simple and vaguely familiar, it reminded him of a day he had once with his dad. However, here the tune took on an eerie feel. John’s earlier decision to stand his ground was sounding more and more stupid by the millisecond.  
He took a step backwards, the figure did nothing but advance on him, one step every twirl. John went backwards again, and the figure took two steps forward. John took another step back and the figure suddenly broke into a run, John startled and quickened his pace, but the figure was closer and closer, it’s mouth open in a horrible grin and it’s eyes boring into his own and the last thing he would see was three horrible scars running across the length of its grey, scabby face when all of a sudden something yanked John sideways by the shoulder and he snapped out of his petrified state. Whatever it was pulled John into a sprint, taking him into an alleyway, then another, changing directions so fast John couldn’t keep up.

He could hear the figure behind him, with loud footsteps and horrible, rasping breath but as he was pulled farther and farther and footsteps got quieter and quieter until there was no sound but his own labored breathing. Whoever had grabbed him pulled him to a stop in front of another crumbly building.

The grip on his shoulder was released, but another hand clamped over his mouth, one on his back, and he was forced through a small hole in the wall which led to inside the building. The inside was even darker than the street, he couldn’t see a thing. As John lay pinned against the concrete, he could hear the labored breathing of his savior. He was roughly pulled into a sitting position, and out of the darkness came an agitated whisper

“What the fuck did you think you were doing?”


	3. The Bunker

“I--” John began, but was cut off.

“No. You’re an idiot. I mean, I assume you’re new but you’re still a complete idiot.”

“I know but--”

“It’s like the first rule of this place,” the person continued, ignoring John altogether. The voice was obviously male. “You see the clown--hell, you see anyone walking towards you in a slow and menacing way you do not say ‘hello’ or try for any kind of contact, you turn tail and you get the fuck away from them.”

“Yeah...” was all John could think of to say.

“Yeah is right. You can’t be expecting someone to save your sorry ass next time.”

“Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. It’s kind of my thing. Who are you anyways?”

“I’m John. John Egbert.”

“Karkat.” John’s eyes had begun to adjust, he could see the vague outline of Karkat sitting next to him and staring straight ahead. He spoke again.

“Well now that you’re here, I suppose I have to take you in. You don’t have anywhere to stay right?”

“Right.”

“Ok then, follow me. And be quiet once we get outside.” He turned towards John, his yellow eyes glowing brightly, but it was slightly less creepy than before. Only slightly.  
Karkat crawled back through the small hole and John followed. They were in a thin alleyway, barely five feet across. It twisted and turned and seemed to even loop back on itself at one point as John silently followed Karkat. He didn’t hesitate as he turned and followed other paths, at one point skirting through a musty-smelling building and out the other side through a broken window, he seemed to have the entire city memorized.

After about fifteen minutes of complicated paths, they came to the entrance of what looked like an old clothing store. The sign was grime-coated and illegible, but the inside held rusty clothes racks and a few decrepit mannequins.

Karkat ignored these and went straight to the right wall, where he knelt down and pulled up a section of the stained carpet. A trapdoor was attached to the stained fabric, and below it yawned a dark hole. The top of a wooden ladder could be seen, leaning against the side of the hole.

“In you go.” Karkat said, gesturing. “You can jump, it’s not far.” John nervously peered into the hole. He couldn’t see anything but blackness.

“I’m good,” he said and reached his foot down onto the ladder. John began to climb down, the ladder wobbled a bit but then steadied. As soon as his entire body was below floor level, he felt a rush of air as Karkat jumped down and the trapdoor closed with a WHUMP!  
John was left in complete blackness, he couldn’t even see his hands in front of him.

“Does anything have lights here?” He asked, calling down to Karkat.

“Yeah, we do inside, but not in the entrance. Don’t want to attract attention.” Karkat answered from directly behind him. The ladder was a lot shorter than John had thought. He stepped off, and followed Karkat’s footsteps to his right. They were in a sort of tunnel, which curved around to the right and was all of a sudden flooded with light, thanks to several florescent lightbulbs strung up across the ceiling. The tunnel was dirt, with wooden support beams every few feet.

“Yeah, see? We got most of them working--” He glanced back at John then cut off. “Holy shit.”

John didn’t answer, he was too busy staring at Karkat.

“I realized you were new but I didn’t think you were this new. Damn, you still look human...”

Karkat’s words didn’t register, John was transfixed. He had heard about the effects of the disease, it had been clearly outlined in school and government pamphlets, but besides the horrific encounter that had happened earlier, he hadn’t really seen a real troll. That was what people called them when they turned.  
Karkat’s skin was a dark grey color, his eyes yellow. His lips had blackened, and behind them John could see glimpses of a mouth full of pointed teeth. His hair was dark, but John wasn’t sure if that was an effect or not, and small orange horns peeked out from each side of his head, like oversized pieces of candy corn.

The troll in question seemed to grasp the fact that John wasn’t paying the slightest attention to what he was saying, so he quietly trailed off and allowed John to observe him for a moment. Personally, Karkat was relieved to see someone looking so normal. Being surrounded by grey skin and glowing eyes the past few years of his life made him fear that he would forget what normal people even looked like. But he knew that, given a few months, the kid would end up just like him. A freak.

After a few more seconds Karkat turned and continued walking down the dimly lit tunnel, John trailing in his wake.

“Get used to it.” He said.

“What?”

“What we look like. You’re going to turn soon enough. When did you get here?”

“I got diagnosed this morning.”

“Shit...they are taking them quick now. Well, you should start seeing your skin change by as early as next week.” John glanced uneasily down at his hand. It was still a pale, peachy color.

“So skin is first?”

“Yeah skin is first. Then hair, but you won’t have to worry about that. Then eyes, teeth and finally you grow these weird little things,” he said, gesturing to his horns. “Mine are still small, haven’t been here too long.”

“Does it...hurt?” He asked, trying not to picture weird growths punching through his skull.

“Horns? No. Well, a little bit. It’s kind of like growing teeth.”

“Oh.”

They had reached a small door which Karkat knocked five times on. They heard a sigh coming from the other side, feet shuffling and then the sound of a padlock being opened.

The door swung inward to reveal another troll, with red and blue glasses and a mildly cross expresison, which softened when he saw Karkat.

“Oh hey kk,” he said. “Who’s the new kid?”

“This is John. Makara was about to bludgeon him so I brought him back.”

“As usual then?”

“Yeah.”

The other troll stepped back, letting Karkat and John inside. He spoke with a lisp, probably due to the fang-like front teeth poking out of his mouth. Neither of the trolls looked much older than John. Karkat shut the door and locked it.

“This is Captor--Sollux. He’s an annoying prick but he’s also the reason that we have electricity and computers,” Karkat explained.

“Your affection knows no bounds,” Sollux said sarcastically as he made his way back to the corner of the room, where several monitors and other technology stood on a sturdy wooden table.

“What did he mean ‘as usual’?” John asked Karkat.

“He has a stupid obsession with rescuing idiots,” Sollux interjected. “No offense.”

Karkat glared at him. “I don’t know. Like I said before, it’s kind of my thing. Like, there was stuff I wanted to do, you know, before all this shit happened. And now I’m stuck here for the rest of my short, stupid life, so I figure I might as well try to do something, help somebody. I probably have six years left, at best, so I guess it’s my way of trying to achieve something. It sounds dumb when I say it out loud though.”

John shrugged. “I don’t think that sounds dumb at all.”


	4. Black Market Ramen

Karkat crossed the room and flopped down on one of the two beaten-up sofas. John followed and sat down at the one perpendicular to it and glanced around the room. It was fairly small, the sofas sitting in the middle around a coffee table covered in stains. On it sat a slightly outdated flat-screen TV. Sollux sat in a swivel chair, typing rapidly, but it was too far away for John to make out what he was saying. Next to the desk, there were several cabinets bolted on the wall, the paint peeling off. Underneath sat an oven, and on it several pans.

John turned behind him and saw that there were three niches in the wall, and in them were blankets and pillows--sort of bunk beds, John supposed. Next to them a door led into another room. The floor was covered in mismatched rugs and carpet squares, giving it a sort of checkerboard appearance.

“You hungry?” Karkat finally said.

“Tired...” John answered. He wanted to ask if he could sleep in one of those bunkbeds in the wall, but he felt like it might be rude.

“Well too bad. Sorry, but you have to stay up ‘till dawn.”

“What? Why?”

“We’re nocturnal,” Sollux answered without looking up from his screen. “Once your skin changes the sun burns.”

“Like vampires?”

Sollux laughed. “Sort of, but it’s not fatal. It just really fucking hurts.”

“Whatever, I’m hungry.” Karkat said, then got up and went over to the stove. John lay back on the sofa and stared up at the ceiling, figuring he might as well get used to being nocturnal now. Last night he slept in his own bed, and now here he was in the secret underground fort of two disease-ridden teenagers which had somehow become his new home.

Yesterday seemed ages away.

Five minutes later, Karkat returned with three bowls of soup, shoving one at John. He looked down at the bowl, surprised to see something so familiar.

“Ramen?” He asked.

“Yeah. Get used to it it’s sort of the only fucking food that survives in this place.”

“Aw, really?”

“Yeah. I mean, sometimes I can trade and get other stuff like twinkies or whatever but they didn’t give us any food when we came and the grocery stores here are really, really old.”

“We do have an oven,” Sollux added. “That beats, like everyone else. Your welcome by the way.”

Karkat rolled his eyes. “We’ve had it for like three years now, people don’t need to keep thanking you.”

Everyone was silent for a moment, the only sound was slurping noodles. After a few minutes, John spoke.

“So...what do you guys do here?”

“Dick around on the computer. Go outside. Kar sells black market ramen.” Sollux said.

“I don’t sell it, dumbass I trade it for stuff. The stuff that you use. And it’s not the black market unless there’s a regular market. I mean, there’s no laws here so you can pretty much do whatever the hell you want.”

“Especially shady noodle dealings in dark alleyways.”

“Hell yeah.”

A lump had formed in John’s throat, unrelated to the soup he was eating. Karkat and Sollux’s back and forth banter had forcibly reminded him of his own best friends. The phrase ‘black market ramen’ seemed exactly the kind of thing Dave would say for no fucking reason, then go on a long metaphorical tangent about it. He didn’t even get to say goodbye to them, the last thing he had said was how much he didn’t want to take that quiz in math, which Rose, Jade and Dave had agreed to. Then they all had to get in alphabetical order along with the rest of the school, so he drifted off to the front of the line with a wave and didn’t see them again.  
Sollux eventually got up and put on a movie, something that John remembered seeing in theatres several years ago, but he didn’t pay much attention. When the first movie ended and they put on a second one, John could hardly keep his eyes open. Karkat gestured that he could sleep in the leftmost bottom bed, then muttered something about it being the worst to Sollux, who sniggered.

John, however, was far too tired to care. He curled up on his side, facing away from the two boys. He slipped off to sleep quickly, dreaming of home.


	5. The View

John woke early the next morning--or night as it was now, because he went to bed so early...or late? John shook his head, trying not to confuse himself. Anyways, he was awake and Sollux and Karkat were clearly still asleep. He pulled the red comforter off him and rolled out of bed. He felt a little rumpled, having slept still in his clothes and shoes.  
Trying not to wake the other two, he tiptoed to the door and unlocked it. He wasn’t running away, Karkat and Sollux seemed friendly enough and he didn’t have anywhere else to stay, he simply wanted to see the city when it was still light out.

John exited into the tunnel, then up the ladder, through the trap door, and into the dusty store. Giving the creepy mannequins a wide berth, he made his way out the door and into the empty street. The sun beat down, it was probably around six or seven in the evening. In the light, the alleyways seemed less threatening. Just kind of sad now. He glanced around, up at the tall buildings and got the sudden urge to climb one. He’d never been afraid of heights, tall places with lots of air and space around always beckoned him.

He raced back into the store, quickly finding a broken-down escalator in the back corner. He jogged up, taking two steps at a time and going up several floors. It took a while, travelling from escalator to escalator to staircase, but he made it up a significant amount of floors. The floors were full of offices now, empty cubicles and scattered papers still lying around. John now understood where Karkat and Sollux got all the furniture.

He finally reached the top floor, and attempted to open the door leading to the roof, but it was locked. Disappointed, he turned away, but a sudden gust of wind startled him. He turned to his left, the wind came through the many windows of the office that were all broken. Could he possibly...?

John clung to the ledge above him, the wind whipping through his hair. He had hesitated before coming out, then realized the fact that he had an incurable, fatal disease that would result in him transforming into a sort of monster like being that was burned by the sunlight. After that, climbing out on a window ledge didn’t seem like that big of a deal.  
Slowly, limb by limb, he crawled up the wall, which thankfully wasn’t that far from the roof, which he flopped onto. It was flat, concrete and empty. It kind of reminded him of the top of Dave’s apartment building, which he tried to avoid thinking about.

John lay on his back, eyes closed, trying to absorb as much heat and light as he could in the short time he had left. The sun beat down on him, soaking through his clothes and into his skin, causing his mind to relax more than it had this entire short, strange trip in Haven. He found himself dozing off, and not caring, because right now he was alone, in the best way possible.

He was woken up by a shake on the shoulder. He blinked, his right hand scrabbling for his glasses before shoving them on his face. He was greeted by glowing yellow eyes illuminating Karkat’s face. It was dark out now, the stars were visible again.

“Hey,” Karkat said. John shook his head, trying to wake up.

“How’d you know I was up here?”

“Well, I didn’t. I thought you’d skipped out on us, this is just where I normally come. You aren’t leaving though, right?”

“Yeah, I’m staying.”

“Good. Get’s a little lonely with just Captor for company.” Karkat moved away and went to sit on the ledge, his back to John and his feet dangling over the edge.

“This is kinda my favorite place,” Karkat continued. “I used to come up here in the daytime when I could, but night is good too. You can see everything that’s going on. Makes it all seem insignificant sort of.” He beckoned to John, who came over and sat next to him. The two of them peered down, looking at the complicated network of alleys and side streets. He could see shadows moving around, and a few flashes of yellow eyes here and there. They watched for a few minutes before John spoke.

“Do you get used to it?”

“What?”

“All this...”

“Sort of. I mean, I’ve been here since I was ten, sometimes I can hardly remember my old life now. This place is just so strange, like people die and kill each other all the time, that’s basically normal. Sometimes I want to go back so badly, but then I remember I look like this. Man, it’s bullshit, you know? Like my own parents probably wouldn’t even recognize me at this point, my friends sure as hell wouldn’t. I mean, to them I’m dead. We’re all dead. They just shove us in this crapass city and that’s it. Like ‘heh, sorry kid, we don’t care that you’re a fucking fifth grader who has never spent more than a night away from your parents, we’re not going to try to cure you, instead we’re going to dump you in a city full of crazy people and have you slowly morph into a monster’.”  
John was silent for a moment. “That fucking sucks dude, I’m sorry.”

“Eh, there’s nothing much I can do really. So I guess you do get used to it over time. But if you want to survive that long, you’re going to have to know a few things.”

“Like what?”

“Well first, how to get around. But I’ll teach you that over time. This city was sort of complicated when it was built, but it’s even more complicated now because of all the gangs and collapsed buildings and other shit. So for now just follow me. Basically what you need to know is that there’s twenty gates to get into the city, all evenly spaced around it. The one that you came through is pretty small, but it does lead directly to main street.” Karkat pointed ahead to the right. “That over there is main street. Basically, stay off. Don’t even go in the alleyways adjourning it. But you should already know that now.” John nodded. He had no desire for a second encounter with the creepy, humming person.

“I usually trade with people near here, or in the east side of the city. The west side is mostly gang territory, and they’re always having huge wars and shit. And it stinks because there’s a fuckload of dead bodies that no one’s taking care of.”

“Have you...known someone who’s died here?”

“Yeah. A few people.”

“Who were they?”

“Well, when I came here I was ten, and a huge wimp, and a bigger idiot than you are Egbert, and that’s saying something. The bunker wasn’t mine, it was already there, and the people that lived there took me in. They were pretty great, but, you know, old. They died from the disease shortly after Sollux came. And then there was Aradia.”

“Aradia?”

“Yeah. She was Sollux’s girlfriend. Arrived shortly after he did. She was nice, a little weird, but they were pretty crazy about each other.”

“But shouldn’t she still be here then? What happened?”

“Well, I don’t exactly know. I wasn’t there, I was out one night, I come home and and the furniture is knocked around everywhere, and he’s sitting there in the middle of the room, covered in blood, holding her body.”

“Oh my god.”

“Yeah so I go over and he’s obviously flipping out, babbling about something, but he wasn’t making any sense, saying it’s his fault, saying it isn’t. So I finally get him to calm down but then he just went silent. We buried Aradia in our sad little homemade graveyard, and he didn’t talk for three days. Finally, the only thing that I could get out of him was that Mindfang was involved.”

“Mindfang?”

“She’s...I don’t even know. Basically she’s really bad news. I’m pretty sure she’s responsible for half the deaths in this place, she’s probably the most famous too. People say all kinds of shit like she can control people’s minds, she’s magic, she can turn into a spider. Anyways, I don’t know what she had to do with Aradia and Sollux, he still won’t talk about it.”

“Really? After all this time?”

“Yeah. Ever since then he’s been a little...off. I mean, he’s basically back to normal except for some weird shit he’s got going with Zahhak.”

“Who’s that?”

“He makes stuff. All sorts of stuff, he’s sort of an expert in robotics I guess. He supplies mostly robotic limbs which is useful because half the fucking people in this place are missing at least one. It’s kind of ridiculous, but he has this whole secrecy thing. He hardly ever comes out in the open, mostly stays in his secret laboratory that hardly anyone knows where it is. Anyways, I kept seeing weird robot parts around the bunker so I finally confronted Sollux about it, and apparently him and Zahhak have sort of a deal.”

“Involving what?”

“This sounds crazy as fuck, but I think they’re trying to bring back Aradia. Through robotics.”

“That sounds crazy as fuck.”

“Yeah I don’t get it either. I’ve just been keeping an eye out, making sure everything’s cool.”

John nodded and looked down at the now crowded streets. It was a lot of information to process. Haven seemed even weirder than before.

“Ok well that’s enough just sitting around for kicks,” Karkat said. “I’m going out, want to come?”

“Sure,” John answered. The two boys slid off the ledge and began the descent back down.


	6. Girl in the Candy Shop

They slid back through the broken window and down the stairways, John was amazed at how Karkat moved without making a single sound. When asked, Karkat said it was due to years of practice. They got to the bottom floor just in time to see Sollux clamber out of the trapdoor, two backpacks slung over his back. He straightened up, slamming the door and tossed one of the backpacks to Karkat, who started to rummage around in it. Finally, he pulled out a black sweatshirt and handed it to John.

“Put that on. The less people see of your skin, the better.” John pulled it on, it actually fit pretty well. Karkat closed the backpack and swung it over his shoulder.

“He’s going with you?” Sollux asked.

“Yeah. See ya!” They exited the shop and walked straight ahead to at a fork in the road, Sollux taking the left path and John following Karkat to the right.

He followed Karkat once again through the winding alleyways, though they felt a bit less threatening now.

“We’re going to see a friend of mine, and I’ll show you around a little bit,” Karkat said quietly over his shoulder, and John nodded. Occasionally they passed other trolls, usually just disembodied gold eyes over dark clothes, some of them nodding at Karkat, others ignoring the two of them completely. They moved at a pace sort of halfway between a walk and a jog, taking long but quick strides. Karkat showed no signs of tiring but John, who had never been the greatest athlete back home, was out of breath pretty quickly.  
They stopped around twenty minutes later, in front of what used to be a tiny sweet shop. The large front window had a hole in it, it looked like someone had thrown a brick through at some point, but otherwise it looked in pretty good condition. A pole jutted out above the door, it looked like it could have held a swinging sign sometime in the past, but now just held a strip of green fabric tied to it.

Karkat pushed the door open, it squeaked and swung as it was only attached by the top hinge. He passed the door to John, who gingerly shut it behind him. The space was cramped, half dominated by a glass display case that once probably held chocolates. Karkat moved around and behind it, to where there was a circle outlined in the floor. He reached towards it, and found a handle, pulling it up. The trapdoor here was almost identical to the one back at the bunker, wood, heavy and with a ladder reaching down into the black depths. Karkat jumped down, and John, trusting him this time, jumped after. He landed in a crouch, turning to see Karkat’s scowl.

“You left the trapdoor open, dumbass,” he said, gesturing towards the open hole. John sighed and scaled the ladder, then closed the door and scooted back down.

The tunnel was similar to the one back home too, same support beams, same slight curve.

“Were these tunnels made by the same people?” He asked. Karkat shrugged.

“I’m not sure. They were here when we got here, I asked Kankri about it one time but he said that he didn’t know.”

“Who’s Kankri?”

“Oh, he was one of the people that lived in the bunker before me, that took me in.”

Just then they reached the end of the tunnel, to a door that Karkat knocked on. A small rectangular of wood near the top of the door opened, and through it an eye was visible.

“Hello?” A voice said.

“It’s me.” Karkat replied. The rectangle closed and the door opened. The troll standing behind it was tall, much taller than Karkat and John, with elegantly cut short hair and a smile on her face. She was wearing a jade green coat over a striped shirt and a long, red skirt.

“Karkat! It’s good to see you...who have you got with you?”

“This is John, newbie. He’s staying with us at the bunker.” He turned back to John. “John, meet Kanaya.”

The troll called Kanaya extended her hand, which John shook.

“Come in then, why don’t you sit down?” She said, gesturing them inside, bolting the door behind him. John and Karkat stepped inside. It was about half the size of the bunker, but definitely better decorated. The walls were artfully draped with fabric, making up for the lack of windows. There was a small sitting area in the middle with a small couch and several chairs around a glass table. The entire place was lit by white christmas lights strung across the ceiling. A wooden table sat to the right, covered in different clothes, fabrics and what looked like half-finished projects. An archway led to a smaller room, through which John could see a bed and an aging wardrobe.  
Karkat sat on the couch, while John settled himself on a small, floral patterned chair.

“Oh, you are new,” Kanaya commented, catching sight of John in full light.

“Got here yesterday,” He answered.

“Sorry,” was all she said. Kanaya went into the next room and came out with a plate of crackers, setting them on the table.

“Sorry, they’re kind of stale,” she said and John and Karkat both began to eat. Kind of stale was an understatement, John thought as he tried to bite into the cracker, it tasted like woodchips. He didn’t say anything out of politeness, but Karkat made a disgusted noise.

“Do you need food? Because we have some, you know.”

“You have two cupboards full of packaged noodles.”

“Which is better than this.” Kanaya rolled her eyes, obviously not very upset.

“So why’d you stop by?”

“Well I was just showing John around, thought you might want to come.”

“Oh, ok.” She stood up and reached to the right side of her waist, where her skirt buttoned all the way down. Then, with a flourish, she ripped the skirt off. John’s eyes bugged, but she was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans underneath.

“Impressive,” Karkat said. Kanaya smiled, showing elegant, pointed teeth. She grabbed a beanie off the table, pulling it over her head and managing to coat her lips in green lipstick at the same time. Karkat hit John in the shoulder,

“We’re leaving, stop staring.” John hastily shook his head and followed Karkat to the door. Kanaya gathered a few things into a small, brown bag which she slung onto her back, and then followed them out the door.

“Where to first?” Karkat asked once they’d gotten back to the sweetshop.

“He’s seen enough of the east side, let’s introduce him to the princess.”


	7. Transition

They walked in a triangle, with John as the awkward third person in the back. Karkat and Kanaya were having a whispered conversation, they made a strange looking pair. Kanaya, who was at least a full foot taller than Karkat, was walking while slightly bent to the side, Karkat kept rising on his tiptoes in order to reach her ear.

Finally, the trio stopped in the middle of a thin, slanting alley. Karkat and Kanaya turned back to face John.

“Ok, so we’re going to have to pass by main street, but we’re on the least populated part, all the way at the opposite end that you came in.” Karkat whispered.

“Basically, don’t make any noise, and stick with us,” Kanaya added. “We do this a lot.”

“Wait,” John said. “I thought you said the west side was mostly gang territory? Why are we going there?”

“We’re not. We’re going to the south but going across main street is the quickest way.” John took a deep breath.

“Ok, let’s go.”

“No talking past this point,” Karkat reminded them. “John, you go in the middle.”

They quickly got into a close-knit single file line, Karkat leading and Kanaya bringing up the rear. The three of them continued down the alley, until main street was visible. Moonlight shone across the four empty car lanes, making what was left of the reflective paint shine.

Karkat slowly peeked his head out, looking to the left. John held his breath, fervently hoping that whoever chased him earlier was long gone. Karkat pulled his head back and nodded, then, in a flash, he reached back and grabbed John’s left hand, Kanaya his right, and sprinted across the street.

John was pulled along, staring at the back of Karkat’s hair, turned silver by the moonlight. He glanced to his left and saw a crowd of figures way down the street, but no yellow flares meaning eyes. The entire trip took under fifteen seconds, but it seemed like an eternity before they were back in the inky blackness of the next alleyway. The two trolls on either side of him didn’t loosen their grip, or decrease speed; John’s arm was almost yanked out of his socket as Karkat abruptly turned, until suddenly he pitched forward. John, who had too much momentum, crashed into him, Kanaya into John, and they all fell in a heap.

They were all silent for a moment, until Kanaya started giggling. John joined in, and Karkat gave a muffled groan.

“Stop laughing and get the fuck off me Egbert,” he muttered.

“Sorry!” John replied, and they slowly clambered to their feet.

“What did you trip over?” Kanaya asked.

“Some idiot standing in the middle of the...” Karkat trailed off, staring to the adjoining alley to the left. “...Nitram?” He held up a hand indicating that the other two should wait, then jogged into the alley. After a few seconds he returned, followed by another troll. The first thing John noticed was the horns, they were massive, sticking out the side of his head and extending at least a foot. Other than that he looked normal, he was a bit taller than Karat, his hair cut in sort of a floppy mohawk down the middle of his head.

“Hey guys, sorry, I didn’t know it was you,” he said, smiling shyly.

“Yeah no problem,” Karkat laughed. “This is John by the way. John, this is Tavros.” The two greeted each other.

“We’re on the way to see the princess, care to join?” Kanaya asked. Tavros shrugged.

“Why not?”

They started walking as a clump again, Karkat and Tavros up front and John and Kanaya in the back. John noticed that Tavros walked strangely, slightly off balance, and there were odd clicking noises every time he took a step. His puzzlement was resolved, however, when Karkat spoke again.

“So how are the new legs treating you?”

“Pretty good. I don’t know how Zahhak does it, but they sure as hell work,” Tavros laughed, lightly hitting his thigh with his knuckles. There was a metal clang.

“Are they prosthetics?” John asked, even though he was pretty sure they weren’t. Prosthetics weren’t that advance that you could walk that easily in them.

“Nope, robotics.”

“Wow.” Technology here was so much more advanced than back home. Kind of strange for a place mostly devoid of electricity and running water, John thought. They walked for a few more minutes in silence, until Karkat asked, in a low voice,

“Did you figure out what happened yet?”

“About what?” Tavros answered.

“The accident causing the literal loss of your legs, dumbass, what else?”

“Oh. Well...it was Mindfang.” John heard a sharp intake of breath from Kanaya.

“Shit are you serious?” Tavros nodded.

“She’s...she’s after me. I don’t know why but she didn’t know I survived. I-I don’t know if she’s found out yet.” His voice had dropped to barely a whisper. Karkat stopped, and John almost ran into him again.

“Ok,” he said. “Change of plan. This shit is serious. You,” he addressed Tavros, “Are not coming to see the princess. A fuckload of people go through that area and you need to avoid crowds. You’re going to stay with us for a little bit, okay? We’re in a sort of underground bunker on the east side.”

“I can take him,” Kanaya interjected.

“Ok,” Karkat said. “Now take this key, it should get you in if Sollux isn’t home.” He took out a small gold key from inside his jacket and handed it to Tavros, who slipped it in his pocket. “We’ll be back in a little bit, stay inside and we’ll figure out what to do with you. And don’t see Zahhak again, even if he tells you too. Mindfang knows him too, remember.” Tavros nodded, then him and Kanaya turned around and started walking back.

John turned back to Karkat, whose expression was worried.

“Is he going to be okay?” John asked. From what he had observed, Tavros seemed perfectly nice. Karkat exhaled.

“I hope so. I don’t know what Mindfang has against the kid. I’ve known him for a while, he could hardly hurt a fly.”

“So who is the princess? Is she like the leader?” John asked, trying to change the subject to something less fear-inducing. Karkat laughed.

“We don’t have a leader, we just call her the princess because she’s rich as fuck. I mean, her story is kind of messed up but then again everyone’s is. So, her mom is this bigshot government official who was in charge of disease control or something. Actually, I don’t really know exactly what she did but she had a lot of say about what to do with people with the disease. As you know, people really flipped out when our affliction started, people were killed, everyone became paranoid and a lot of rumors spread that once you caught the disease you were like a zombie, which is obviously untrue. Anyways, she was of kind of the same mindset. She thought that once you contracted the disease, you were less than human, a kind of scrum that should be removed. She almost got immediate extermination upon contraction of the disease legalized, but thankfully that didn’t pass as a law. Pretty much the only fucking good thing our government has done about this. So, as a plan B of sorts she came up with the idea for the Haven project. Which is basically throwing us all in a few shit cities and forgetting about us. There’s no cure research, only prevention and immunization. Again, that’s thanks to her.”

“So what does this have to do with the princess then?”

“Well, she had a daughter. And the lady was so paranoid about her contracting the disease that she locked her up inside their huge mansion or whatever. She basically had no contact with anyone for the first few years of her life. But then, she became a teenager, and she started sneaking out without her mom knowing. Since she had been basically imprisoned her whole life once she got out she had zero common sense. So you can guess what happened next.”

“She got the disease.”

“Yeah. You can imagine how much her mom flipped out. Makes all of our situations seem better I suppose. So anyways the woman had already passed so many laws she was legally obligated to send her daughter to one of the cities. So, she built a huge mansion here and basically tried to imprison her again.”

“Did it work?”

“Nah, she overpowered the guards like the first week she was here, so I heard. The mansion is open now, and it has running water and food and shit so its kind of like a sanctuary. Nobody really messes with her because she gives everyone food and lets you take a shower, and also because she carries a hugeass trident wherever she goes.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, you can sort of see the top of the building over there.” Karkat pointed slightly to the left.

John squinted and he could see the top of a white, dome shaped building.

They walked the rest of the way in silence, John pondering over the story. He had heard of the woman before, the one passing all the laws about treatment of infected people. With a sickened feeling in his stomach, he remembered even agreeing with some of them. It seemed so foreign that he could have ever thought that pushing sick people out of society could ever get rid of the sickness, because, whether he liked it or not, he belonged to a whole new society now.


	8. The Princess

The building looked extremely out of place in the decrepit city. It was white, fairly clean and had light streaming from all the windows, making the small light bulb string at the bunker seem pathetic. At the front were double doors, propped open. Inside John could see a lobby, with an assortment of raggedy people sitting around on various expensive looking pieces of furniture. This was the most amount of trolls John had ever seen gathered in one place, he had never felt more exposed with still pale skin. Most of the trolls present looked like they basically lived on the streets, with grimy, ripped clothing and matted hair.

In fact, the only person who wasn’t in contrast with the stark cleanliness of the mansion was a teenage boy in kind of ridiculous looking striped pants sitting alone on one of the sofas. He raised his head when Karkat and John entered, his yellow eyes framed by large glasses. John wondered if trolls even needed glasses after their eyes changed. Surely having weird glow-in-the-dark yellow eyes would correct the nearsighted thing. At least, he hoped it would cure his eyes.

The striped pants guy nodded at Karkat, who in return waved his hand in greeting.

“That’s Eridan,” Karkat muttered out of the side of his mouth as they passed by. “He’s ok but Sollux and him have sort of a bullshit rival thing. I try not to get involved.”

They passed several closed doors, which Karkat informed John were food storage, then up a large maroon staircase. At the top were another set of double doors, which Karkat pushed open. They were in a hallway, with open doorways on either side of them. They peeked into the one on the right, and saw the back of someone’s head, who was sitting on a couch.

"Feferi?” Karkat said, and the head turned. It was a girl, with huge, wavy hair pushed back by pink goggles on her forehead. As soon as she saw them she smiled, showing all twenty or so pointed teeth.

“Hey! I was just talking to Sollux here...who’s the new guy?”

John’s first impression was that she talked in a way that you could almost hear smiley emoticons in her voice.

“This is John. John, meet Feferi.” Feferi waved and grinned again. They entered the room and saw Sollux sitting on the other side of the couch, looking a bit disgruntled. He wasn’t wearing his usual heterochromatic glasses, which he seemed never to take off. When he looked up, John was startled to see that he didn’t have any whites of his eyes, or irises, or even pupils. One eye was red, the other blue, both completely filled in. Sollux caught John staring, picked his glasses off the side of the sofa and shoved them on his face, muttering that yes, he knew he had weird eyes.

“Yeah, I just brought him down to show him around, and this is kind of the place to be, you know?” Karkat was saying to Feferi. “So what’s Captor doing down here anyway?”

“Zahhak won’t see me,” Sollux answered for himself. “Says the deals off. And I was in the neighborhood so why not?”

“Yeah, well I’m glad you all stopped by! You know if you guys ever need anything just ask okay? And come over more often, it gets lonely with just Eridan sticking around.”

“You two doing ok then?” Karkat asked. Feferi shrugged.

“As much as usual.”

“Sorry to be rude guests, but we need to head out,” Karkat said. “We have a bit of a situation to take care of back home.”

“Yeah, no problem,” she replied, “Good to meet you though,” she added to John, who smiled back. Karkat led John back out of the room and down the hallway, Sollux jogging to catch up a few seconds later.

“What did you mean about a situation back home?” Sollux asked and they descended the staircase.

“Tavros has Mindfang on his ass. Turns out that’s who pushed him in the first place.”

“Shit. That’s serious.”

“Yeah. So I told him he could stay over for a while, try to stay inconspicuous.”

“You what?” Sollux said loudly in the middle of the lobby. Several people looked up. He rolled his eyes and grabbed Karkat’s arm, pulling him outside quickly.

“Are you an idiot kk? If Mindfang is on his trail, his trail is going to lead her right to us. Wow, great plan you have there, get us all killed instead.”  
Karkat was looking extremely regretful.

“Fuck. Shit. Sorry. I should’ve told him to go somewhere else, somewhere hidden...”

“Yeah. You know for a total asshole, sometimes you’re a little too nice.”

The two were silent for the entire rest of the way back to the bunker. They crossed main street the same way as before, a frightened sprint, and then Karkat led them back through the maze of streets to the old clothing store.

“Home sweet home,” Sollux muttered, staring at the creepy array of mannequins scattered around the room and Karkat lifted the trap door. He invited John to jump first, which he did. A whoosh of air later he was crouched on the tunnel floor, but something was slightly different.

“Guys...? The door is open.” There were two thumps behind him as Karkat and Sollux landed.

“It’s probably just Nitram being an idiot and leaving it open.” Karkat said. Him and Sollux stepped ahead of John towards the door.

“It smells like--” Sollux started, then abruptly stopped. “Oh no. Oh shit, no.”

Karkat gave a startled gasp, and John moved between them, and his stomach flipped.

It was Tavros, lying directly behind the entryway. His legs were askew, broken, and small gears and shards of metal lay scattered around. His eyes were open, lips slightly parted and a giant hole was in his chest. Out of in oozed brown goo, which gathered around him like a grotesque brown pool. John felt nauseous, he had never seen a dead body in his life, let alone one this mangled. He glanced away from it, trying to regain his senses but what met his eyes didn’t help in the slightest.

The bunker was mangled, the furniture was knocked over, the cupboards open and contents scattered everywhere. Worse, the walls and floor were splattered with brown goo, as if a horde of children had decided to go fingerpainting in some sort of troll blood. There were hand prints, smears and even bizarre smiley faces, each with eight eyes.  
Karkat looked up, groaned and staggered back, banging into the wall of the tunnel and sliding down into a sitting position. John sat across from him, and Sollux next to John. They sat without speaking or looking at each other for several minutes. Finally, John managed to regain use of his vocal chords, and said creakily, “We’re fucked, aren’t we?” Karkat groaned, bringing his face to his knees.

“Yeah. We’re fucked.”


	9. Burial

Kanaya was gone. When the boys had finally stood up, John feeling rather weak-kneed, they’d searched the bunker, and Sollux went to check Kanaya’s house. She wasn’t there, and there wasn’t any of her blood, which Karkat said was a dark green color. That was about all he said the rest of the day. Repeated it a few times, saying that if she was dead there would be blood.

And then came the task of cleaning. Karkat had covered Tavros in one of the old bedsheets, and they sort of rolled him up as best they could, a few gears and chips of metal remained on the ground, which John gathered and disposed of. Sollux hoisted the misshapen bundle over his back as Karkat went to get a few shovels from the other room.  
John felt like he was in a trance, slowly going through motions as he accepted a shovel from Karkat and followed the other two out the front door. He had never expected to hand bury anyone in his life, let alone before he got out of middle school.

“Careful!” Karkat hissed as Sollux clambered unsteadily out of the trapdoor hole, the body swinging precariously and a drop of something wet landed on John’s face. He cringed. They exited the clothing store and turned right, walking the perimeter to the back, John had never been this way.

It was a short walk, barely five minutes before they reached what probably used to be a very small park or garden. Now however, it was just a large rectangle of dirt, about the size of a house. In the top right corner, several large stones were lain on the ground. John supposed they were a stand-in for grave markers. Karkat led him over, and pointed to five stones lying several feet apart in a row.

“That’s Kankri, the white stone, and Latula and Mituna next to him. They lived in the bunker before us, and that’s Porrim, she lived in the candy shop before Kanaya.” He didn’t sound sad exactly, mostly just tired. John didn’t ask who was in the fifth grave, he could see that next to it lay several wilting flowers. Besides, Sollux was right behind them and John didn’t know if mentioning Aradia would bother him.

Tavros’ body was laid next to them, still wrapped in the sheet, which was now speckled in brown. They put their shovels in the ground a few feet from the edge of Aradia’s grave and began to dig.

They were barely half a foot in the ground when John’s shoulders started to ache, the shovel seemed to get heavier and heavier each time he lifted it. Karkat and Sollux didn’t seem to notice, though, they both moved quickly and efficiently, clearly used to the act of grave digging.  
By the time they were finished, they stood in a good-sized hole and John’s arms were about to fall off. He was sweaty, covered in dirt and generally uncomfortable. Karkat scrambled out of the hole and picked up the body, heaving it in. Neither John nor Sollux was prepared, the body landed on their heads and then rolled to the side, and one of Tavros’ metal legs came of with a crunching sound as he hit the ground.

Karkat made a strangled noise in his throat but didn’t curse at them, which was unusual. John, who had jumped backwards when it hit him, was fighting a strange urge to laugh, if it was anything else that had fallen on their heads like that it would be hilarious, but at the moment he just felt like they were the completely wrong people to be burying anyone. Sollux had reached down and straightened the body, then pulled the stained sheet back where it had slipped off.  
John picked up the half-leg and tried feebly to reattach it, then just jammed it next to the other one. Sollux and John climbed out of the hole, all three of them picking up the shovels again.

It was far easier putting the dirt back in the ground, they finished quickly, but the stars had begun to fade by the time they patted the mound of dirt flat. Karkat quickly found a large, misshapen stone which they placed at the head of the grave, then all three of them paused.

“Do we...say anything?” John asked tentatively, the first time any one of them had spoken in hours.

“What’s the point?” Karkat answered. “I mean, he’s dead. His family doesn’t give two shits about him anymore and if they did I’m pretty sure no one would want us three to fuck up this burial more than we already have.”

And with that the three of them turned away from the graveyard. They walked slowly, until Sollux suddenly hissed. A second later Karkat winced as well. John turned around, he felt fine, but both the other trolls were suddenly bent over, heads down. John suddenly looked up, and saw that the sun had come up while they were walking home. He ran behind Sollux and Karkat and shoved them forward, yelling “Hurry up, go!”

They stumbled and ran, half limping and clearly in pain, then collapsed the minute they entered the doors of the clothing store, and out of the sun. John entered a few seconds later.

“Is it that bad?” He asked to the other two, who were both curled up on the ground. Karkat flipped him off.

“We need to stop doing that,” Sollux said through clenched teeth.

“Yeah,” said Karkat, slowly moving to his feet. He turned, and John could see red patches covering the back of his neck and arms. Sollux was covered in similar patches, though his had a more yellowish tinge. They dropped down the trapdoor and down the hallway to where the door was still open. All three of them groaned, having forgotten about the massive amounts of blood covering nearly every surface.

By the time the bunker was clean, or at least blood free, John’s eyelids were drooping. Karkat and Sollux were sprawled across the sofas, holding water soaked rags to their irritated skin. John traipsed to the other room and into the tiny bathroom and turned on the shower. He had already been warned that the bunker didn’t have hot water, but at this point he was too filthy to care.

The cold water still came as a shock, however, and John was unfortunately wide awake by the time he pulled some borrowed clothes on, rinsing his dirt-covered ones in the tub.

Reemerging into the main room, he made a beeline for the leftmost bottom bed, and crawled under the covers.  
The day had been long and extremely strange, but John was a little freaked out about how calm he felt about everything at the moment. It was strange how quickly one could adjust, he thought, he had just spent the evening burying someone who he had met in the same afternoon, but he wasn’t panicking. Should he be?  
John rolled over to face the wall, one which still held faint brown smears. Sollux and Karkat were complaining quietly behind him, but at least for the moment John put everything that had happened behind him, and fell asleep.


	10. Guests

John was woken early to a faint knocking on the door. He groaned and shifted around, trying to untangle his limbs from the many covers that twisted around him. He could hear Karkat moving above him, and Sollux next to him.

“I swear to god if it’s Pyrope again... ” Sollux mumbled.

“I told you I haven’t seen her in weeks!” Karkat retaliated.

“Yeah, sure.”

“Whatever, I’ll get it.”

John looked up to see Karkat’s socked foot dangling in front of his face as he slowly slid out of bed and onto the ground. He padded over to the door and out of John’s field of vision. John closed his eyes again, all too eager to sleep for a few more hours. He heard the creak of the door opening, then a moment of silence.

“Oh my god.”

John clambered out of bed and turned to face the doorway, then immediately sprinted over. Kanaya was laying in the doorway, clothes ripped, eyes fluttering and skin charred. Karkat and John each grabbed one of her shoulders and half carried, half dragged her over to the couch. The floor shuddered slightly as Sollux jumped down to join them.  
If John had thought the burns Sollux and Karkat had gotten looked painful, they were nothing compared to the current state of Kanaya’s skin. Her face, neck and arms were raw and bleeding, making her appear completely green. Her mouth was open, lips shriveled from lack of moisture. There was a tear running down the middle of her shirt, and on her pant legs, and her clothes were streaked with dirt, it looked like she had dragged herself along the ground all the way down the dirt tunnel.  
“How the hell did you escape?” Karkat asked, sounding thoroughly freaked out. Kanaya groaned, not answering.

Sollux appeared at her elbow with a glass full of water, gently lifting her head and tipping it into her mouth. She drank greedily, water spilling out the side of her mouth and onto the sofa. When the cup was finished she lay back, panting slightly.

“She...didn’t kill me,” Kanaya said between breaths. “Left me outside...after she stabbed...I was out all day before I woke up.”

“Well I don’t know why she did that but I’m glad she did,” Sollux said, looking concerned. Kanaya didn’t answer, her eyes had closed.

“We should get something for her skin...” Karkat said, then left into the second room. Sollux was still staring down at Kanaya, but John could tell he wasn’t really looking at her anymore.

“I don’t know if this is good news or bad news,” he finally said.

“What do you mean?” John asked.

“Well, this could be her saying that she only had it out for Tavros, and that she doesn’t care about us, you know? But it could also just mean that she has a thing for Kanaya for some reason.”

Karkat returned with several rags doused in cold water, which he draped awkwardly over her forehead and arms, then sank into the second couch, putting his hands to his forehead.

“The only reason,” he said to no one in particular, “I liked living in a goddamn hole in the ground is so I could avoid all of this shit! Like, it’s hard enough just to get food and crap, we don’t need a fucking hitman on our tail.” Sollux crossed the room and flopped next to him.

“Right now all we can do is think about this,” he said. “Right now let’s assume that Mindfang is on our ass. So we have to stop her.”

“You can’t. There’s no fucking way we can stop her.”

“We can’t. But there’s one person who can.”

Karkat lowered his hands. “She wouldn’t do it. You know the history between the two of them.”

“You don’t know that. She would do it for you.”

Karkat glared at him. “I told you, we’re not a thing anymore.”

“Yeah with our fucking lives at stake I think it wouldn’t hurt to ask.”

“Fine. You watch Kanaya.” Karkat stood up and went into the other room, coming out a minute later in dark jeans and a black sweatshirt. John motioned to follow him, but Karkat shook his head.

“Sorry kid, but you can’t come today. I’m going way far in.” And with that he flicked the hood up, nothing visible but a yellow glow of his eyes, then opened the door and disappeared down the tunnel.

“Where’s he going?” He asked Sollux.

“Trying to get ahold of an old friend of his, Redglare, but she’s pretty hard to find.”

John nodded and then yawned, realizing how tired he was. Sollux had spaced out again, staring straight ahead, so John slunk back over to his bed and crawled inside. His last thought before falling asleep again was that he had already begun to think of the hole in the wall with blankets as his own bed.

After what seemed like two minutes, but was actually a little over an hour, John was awoken yet again by Sollux shaking his shoulder. John blinked his eyes open to the blurry view of Sollux already dressed.

“Hey, Egbert I have to leave for a little bit. Kanaya’s still sleeping so just keep an eye on her until she wakes up, ok? I should be back in an hour or so.” John nodded and rubbed his eyes, but by the time he removed his hands, Sollux had left.

John got up and got dressed, pulling on what he assumed were some of Sollux’s clothes left out for him. He really needed to get new clothes, but doubted that there were that many vendors left. Maybe Kanaya could make something for him, her house looked like she always was making stuff.  
There was a knock on the door. Was Karkat back already? No, he wouldn’t knock. For a moment John froze, fearing that it was Mindfang at the door, but dismissed that. What kind of murderer knocked? And besides, she stole the key off Tavros’ body. That thought didn’t make him feel entirely better, but it did make him go and answer the door.

He opened it a crack to see a female troll standing there.

“Hey,” She said. “I’m a friend of Karkat’s, he told me to come here.” John looked at her. She was taller than him, with long and rather messy hair. Her horns were much taller than Karkat’s or Sollux’s, one was identical to Kanaya’s, and the other shaped a bit like a claw. She was dressed casually, a blue coat thrown over a black shirt and jeans.

“Are you Redglare?” He asked. He couldn’t see any red on her besides her shoes, but maybe the name referenced something else. She smiled, showing glistening, razor sharp teeth. Looking closer, John could see that something was off about her left eye, she seemed to have more than one pupil.

“Yep,” she answered.

“Where’s Karkat?”

“He had to see someone, he told me to come ahead.”

“Oh, okay. Why don’t you come in and wait?” He opened the door, gesturing her inside and suddenly feeling more at ease. Sollux had said that Mindfang wouldn’t hurt them as long as Redglare was around.


	11. Mindfang

Redglare entered the room, and stopped when she saw Kanaya, still passed out on the couch.

“What happened to her?”

“Mindfang left her out in the sun, I think.” Redglare nodded and looked serious.

“Well that won’t be a problem for much longer.”

“Yeah, thank you for doing this by the way.”

“No problem,” she smirked. “I know Mindfang very well.” She crossed the room and settled herself on the couch.

“Is that your real name?” John asked, curious. She laughed.

“Redglare? No, it’s a stage name. Kind of stupid, actually, but now I can’t shake it. Sounds intimidating though. My real name is Vriska.”

“I’m John. Nice to meet you.” He walked over and joined her on the couch, sinking down slightly.

“You’re new right? How long ago did you get here?”

“Just a few days ago.” Had he really only been here a few days? Time seemed to pass so much slower than before. Or at least more things had been happening.

“Wow, well you seem to be adjusting quickly. And you won’t look weird for long, trust me.”

“Yeah, Karkat told me.” Vriska laughed, a not altogether friendly sound.

“I bet he did! He loves it, to talk your damn ear off.”

“Yeah...” John replied, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. The tone of voice she was taking didn’t sound kind or joking at all.

“You seem quieter, though. I like you.” She stared intently at him.

“Um, thanks?” John shifted, trying to think of a way that he could ask her to leave without being rude.

“I was going to kill you, you know. But now I don’t think I will.” She smiled, her eyes glinting dangerously.

“Wait, what?” John said, sure he hadn’t heard her clearly.

“I said, I don’t think I’ll kill you after all, you’re cute.” John rose from the couch, his eyes wide.

“Wh...” He started backing away, but Vriska rose to a standing position. She was quite a bit taller than him, looking down and examining her nails, which had been filed to sharp points.

“You might have guessed,” she said, looking up and baring her fangs again. “But I’m not Redglare.”

She moved faster than John could react, advancing on him and sliding her leg around the back of his knees, causing him to topple helplessly forward. She pushed him back and kneeled, her knee planted on his chest and pressing his chest down into the hard floor. He flailed and tried to arch his back up, but her hands moved like bullets, catching his wrists and planting them into the floor.

“Good,” she smiled. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

“Are you...Mindfang?” John said, struggling for breath.

“Wow,” she said mockingly, “Nothing gets past you, does it? You’re lucky you’re pretty.” The pressure on his chest decreased as she sat back on his abdomen and let his wrists go. John didn’t make an attempt to free himself, he already knew it was futile. Vriska didn’t speak for a moment, just sort of stared into space.

John supposed she was beautiful, in a strange, deadly kind of way. When she didn’t have that creepy smile on. She turned back to him, about to say something else when they heard Kanaya’s cough from the couch. Vriska’s eyes went wide and she turned to her left to see Kanaya’s stirring form. Seemingly forgetting about John, she stood up and walked slowly over, kneeling by Kanaya’s head.

John scrambled backward, behind the second couch. From around the side, he could see that Kanaya’s eyes were now open, the girls’ faces were only a few inches apart. They were holding a whispered conversation, John couldn’t pick up any of it, but after a few more seconds, Vriska stood up and abruptly left, leaving the door of the bunker swinging and not giving John a second glance.

After a good two minutes of being frozen in place, John finally stood up on shaky legs and checked on Kanaya, whose eyes were closed again. Just then Sollux came walking through the door, soaking wet and shaking rain out of his hair.

“Sup Egbert, why’s the door open?”

John only stared, trying to find his voice. Sollux removed his glasses and wiped the raindrops off, looking up again.

“M-mindfang.”

“What?”

“She was here.”

Sollux stared at him, looking skeptical. “Yeah, she killed Tavros.”

“No I mean like ten minutes ago.”

“What? How come you’re still alive then?”

“She said she...liked me. And that she was going to kill me but then she decided not to but then Kanaya woke up and she went over and started talking to her and she had pinned me down and then--”

“Whoa there Egbert, calm down.” Sollux held his hands out. “Ok what happened, slowly.”

“She came in, said she was Redglare, sat on me, talked to Kanaya and then left.”

“She said she was Redglare? And you believed her?”

“Hey, I don’t know what she looks like.” Sollux exhaled.

“Well, when you see her the name will make sense. We should wait for Karkat to get back and then decide what to do. You hungry?”

“Yeah,” John replied, settling down on the couch while Sollux wandered towards the oven. “Where were you, by the way?” He asked, turning around. Sollux shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter.”

He returned a few minutes later with steaming noodles that John figured came from the dark blue ramen flavor. They ate in silence, aside from slurping occasionally.

“Why are your eyes like that?” John finally asked, seeing that Solux still hadn’t put his glasses back on. The question, among numerous others, had been bugging him for a while.

“I don’t know. It just kind of happened.”

“You can see though, right?”

“Not very well. And hardly in the dark, I never got the whole glowing eyes thing.”

“So you can’t see outside?”

“Sort of, I guess. But I can still get around easily enough, I’ve been here a long enough time to know all the routes.”

“How old were you? When you were diagnosed, I mean.”

“Eleven. It was the first time anyone had really paid attention to me, I guess. No one liked me before because of the way I talked or whatever, but as soon as the light flashed red it was all like ‘oh no’ and ‘I’m so sorry’. Total bullshit. They got me at school, and then kept me in a locked room for two days.”

“They didn’t do that to me.”

“Yeah, I guess it was different a few years ago. They were still trying to figure out more stuff about it, so they took all these samples and tests and shit. I didn’t see my parents or anyone again. And then after all that, they just dumped me on the truck and left me here.”

“Were you mad?”

“You kidding? Yeah, I was mad. I spent the best part of two years trying to make this place less shitty for everyone who lived here, getting electricity and running water and getting that fucking ancient oven to work, but by the time I finally got everything working, everyone but Karkat was dead. We’re all fucking time bombs, ticking away, and then dropping right in order. Except if you just get killed outright. I sometimes think it would almost be better to just--” He broke off, looking down at his food again.

John wondered what the whole ‘right in order’ part meant, but he didn’t inquire further, Sollux looked like he was done talking for now.

They finished in silence, Sollux taking the bowls and stacking them by the oven, to be washed in the shower later. He said he was working on trying to make a sink, but it was a long project and he kept getting interrupted with shit like this. John assumed he was talking about Mindfang.

Another half hour had passed before Karkat strode inside, soaking wet.

“Who left the fucking door open?”


	12. Redglare

Sollux walked over and quickly explained the situation to Karkat, whose eyes bugged out in response.

“Here? Like here, here?” He looked over at John for conformation, who nodded.

“Ok, no. Fuck this, we are not spending another minute in this hole.”

“Where would we go?” John asked.

“Kanaya’s,” Karkat replied.

“Isn’t Redglare with you?” Sollux asked. Karkat shook his head.

“Nah, she said she would come by when she wanted. She can find us easily.” He moved to the side room and came back with several beat-up backpacks, which he chucked at Sollux and John. Sollux gestured for John to pack food while Sollux started throwing clothes into his. John strode over to the cabinets over the oven, he could hear Karkat trying to wake Kanaya up behind him. He opened them to find, to no surprise, they were overflowing in packets of ramen. He stuffed as many packs as he could in the backpack, then zipped it up, hearing the crunch of dry noodles breaking.

He turned back and saw that Karkat had persuaded Kanaya to her feet, though she was still leaning heavily on him.  
The three of them left quickly, Sollux passcode locking the non-portable computers and shutting the lights off as they left.

The journey to Kanaya’s was slow and anxiety-inducing, every shadow seeming to appear as Mindfang’s silhouette. They arrived safely, however Kanaya was being half-dragged in by Sollux and Karkat. They re-entered her overwhelmingly green room and laid her on the bed.

“We’re safe here. As far as I know Mindfang doesn’t know where Kanaya lives,” Karkat said after they had dumped their stuff in a corner and settled on the couch.

“But she knew her.” John said quietly, still not feeling like talking. Karkat looked concerned.

“I don’t know what that was about, Kanaya had never mentioned knowing her.” John nodded, exhausted. It wasn’t even midnight yet and he had already had a run-in with a serial killer.

Sollux sighed and kicked at one of the many green carpets adorning the floor.

“This sucks. When the hell did you say Redglare was going to help?”

“I don’t know. She just said when she felt like it. I wasn’t going to press her in case she changed her mind. Hopefully she’ll show up in a day or two.”

A day passed. Nothing. Then two, three, seven, thirteen whole days passed before there was any sign of the mysterious Redglare. On the fourth day John woke to several grey patches on the back of his right hand. He held it in front of his face and stared for several seconds, trying to suppress the nauseating feeling that squirmed in his stomach. After about a minute, he quickly got out of bed and ran into the other room, shoving his arm in Karkat’s face, who replied with something along the lines of “Congratulations dipshit, you’re a man now” and then rolled over back to sleep.

Kanaya recovered quickly, the gruesome burn marks becoming fainter and fainter by each day, until all that remained were slight distorted patches of skin. Tension was running a little high at the candy shop, mostly because of the fact that there were four people staying over and only two beds. Kanaya kept hers, Karkat instantly leaped on the other one when they arrived, leaving John and Sollux to wrestle over who got the couch. Sollux won.

By the seventh day John’s entire hand was grey, and he noticed a small patch on his face. He tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal. Near the end of the two-week long stretch, all four of them tried to spend as least time in the candy shop as possible, but most of all Sollux. During the last week he was hardly seen at all, only to occasionally drop by for meals and for a few hours of rest. When asked where he was constantly disappearing to, he would just shrug and shake his head. Karkat and Kanaya knew better than to pester him, when the older boy didn’t want to share something, no one would ever hear it.

John, who had taken to spending long hours alone on the roof of a nearby apartment building, was more focused on himself. By the tenth day both of his hands had filled in and the grey patches were advancing up his arm. He started avoiding mirrors, ducking his head every time he went into Kanaya’s room to try to avoid freaking out. He was trying hard to pass this new development off as no big deal, but to be honest it was terrifying him. He had tried to distract himself by climbing, the apartment building roof could only be accessed by scaling the many ramshackled terraces, but that meant he was constantly looking at his alien-like hands.

His new skin was rougher, a bit like sandpaper, and the hair on his arms had become much more sensitive, standing on end at the slightest sound of a footstep. He now understood how quickly and soundlessly Karkat and the other trolls moved in the dark, it was a natural reflex when your body told you there was something nearby.  
And so, two weeks later John lounged on the roof, his back flat and legs dangling haphazardly off the edge.

“Hey! Egbert!” John sighed and sat up, pushing his hair out of his face. Kanaya had been the only one to call him by his first name this whole time. He leaned over the edge to see Karkat standing on a rusty terrace several stories down.

“What?” He called down.

“She’s here.”

That could mean one of two things, John thought, but the lack of panic in Karkat’s voice pointed towards Redglare being the ‘she’. He slid off the edge, landing in a crouch on the closest balcony. Karkat sighed, visibly annoyed that he had to make the four-story journey to get John’s attention, and started back down. John followed, mirroring his smooth movements. Hand on the handrail, flip the legs over, swing down in an arc, let go, repeat. Descending was much quicker, he made it down in under ten minutes, then followed Karkat back to the candy store.

She appeared as a tall, slim silhouette, leaning casually against the window of the candy store. She turned when she heard the two approach, her eyes blocked by angled red glasses, reflecting the moonlight. She grinned, her mouth opening far wider than John expected it to, her neatly pointed fangs glinting silver.

“Is this the new kid you wanted to show me? He smells great!”

“Don’t lick him,” Karkat muttered and pushed past her to enter the store. Redglare wasn’t that much taller than John, but she seemed to dwarf him all the same. She was dressed in teal and red, and clutching a white and red dragon-headed cane behind her back. John couldn’t see her eyes through the glasses, but the skin around them was oddly discolored. She gestured that he should enter first, which he did. She followed closely behind him, John could hear her breathing deeply and shuddered slightly. He opened the trapdoor and jumped down, then turned around but he did not hear her land.

“You coming or not?” A voice said from behind him. He jumped and turned, and there she was, halfway down the tunnel. He followed and entered, the fairy lights strung across the ceiling throwing his patchy skin into focus. Karkat was sitting alone in the middle of the couch, Sollux and Kanaya were nowhere to be found.  
Redglare inhaled deeply and crossed the room, settling on a green patterned chair. John sat next to Karkat.

“So,” she said. “You said you needed me to kill Mindfang?”

“...yeah.” Karkat replied. Redglare looked disgruntled.

“You know our history as well as anyone.”

“Yeah, that’s why I thought you could…”

“It’s more complicated than that.” John knew he was missing out on a huge part of the story but felt that it wasn’t the time to ask.

“Terezi she is going to kill us. All of us. Well, not Kanaya I guess, or maybe not John but I know she is going to kill me. It’s only a matter of time. Please tell me you don’t value her life more.”

“You know I don’t. But I’m not just a random hitman. I take out the bad guys, the ones that really deserve it. I restore justice.”

“She killed Tavros. And tons of other people, I mean look what she did to you!”

“I can’t.”

“That’s my fucking point. It--”

“Let’s talk later ok? I’ll think about it. But I want to hear about this new kid! Who are you?” She turned to stare at John.

“That’s John. He’s only been here a couple weeks.”

“You don’t smell very grey.”

John had no clue how to respond to that.

“Thanks…?”

“No problem!” She was silent for a moment.

“Is that why you’re called Redglare?” He asked.

“Is what?”

“Your glasses.”

“These? Oh, no.” She grinned again, and then lowered her glasses. John visibly recoiled, but he knew that she didn’t notice. The discolored skin he had noticed around her glasses earlier was, in fact, scar tissue. White scars covered the entirety of her upper face, crisscrossing and distorting her skin. That wasn’t anything, however, compared to her eyes. Her eyelids were gone, or otherwise fused to the skin around her eye socket, leaving her eyes wide and permanently open. They were a deep red, not unlike one of Sollux’s, but unlike his, they were not smooth and glassy. Her eyes were mottled and crusted, no pupil, iris or white visible. They were sunken back in her head,like scabs in place of eyeballs. The left eye had a large dent, making her overall appearance grotesque. Thin cracks were visible in them, and out of each trickled a tiny bit of tar black substance, which slowly made its way to pool in her lower eye socket.

“H-how?” He asked weakly.

“Childhood skirmish,” she answered. “But I have a better way of seeing now. By the way, where’s Sollux? He’s usually skulking around you.” She addressed Karkat.

“I don’t know. He’s become really fucking shady lately.”

“I smelled him over by the mansion the other day.”

“Fuck, really?”

“Yeah! I don’t know what he keeps doing over there but I can guess,” She smiled provocatively.

“Wait, you think that him and--?”

“Yeah!” She laughed. Were they talking about Feferi? John wondered. The two of them did seem close when he was there, but he had been under the impression that Sollux wasn’t over Aradia yet.

“Well this has been nice,” Terezi said, “But I can’t stay for long. Duty calls.”

“Wait, you’re leaving already? We waited two weeks!”

“I said I’ll think about it. And nice to meet you John! Hopefully we will see eachother soon.”

And with that she stood and exited so quickly that neither John nor Karkat had enough time to even open their mouths.

“I can’t believe her,” Karkat said, collapsing back on the couch.

“You two had a thing?” John asked, remembering Sollux’s comment from a few weeks ago. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the thought, Terezi was so commanding.

Karkat blushed, “Don’t remind me.”

John stood up and left the room, heading back up the ladder and out the candy shop. He walked the half block to the crumbling apartment building and started climbing up, but knew that unfortunately he could never achieve the same comfortable position as before.

After about twenty minutes of climbing he was about to flop down again, when he spotted someone in a dark hoodie far below. After a second of squinting, he saw that, to his surprise, it was Sollux, whom he hadn’t seen in two days.

He was walking backwards, and he wasn’t alone. There was another figure, one John only vaguely recognized from his brief visit to the mansion. The kid was wearing a ridiculous purple outfit, but was toting across his back what was unmistakably a large gun. The two of them seemed to be having some sort of argument, Sollux had stopped backing up and was tensed. Their body language was hostile, and John wondered if he should intervene.

He jumped back down to the highest balcony and peered over the edge. The two had started slowly circling, still shouting at each other.

Fast as lightning, the kid in purple whipped the machine gun around and pointed it directly at Sollux’s chest.


	13. Broken Eyes

John knew he was too far up for them to hear him, so he lept into action, swinging over the side of the railing. His feet hadn't even touched down on the concrete before he heard the gunshot. His stomach lurched as he landed in a crouch and turned slowly around, expecting to see Sollux lying on the pavement.

However, as he squinted down into the blackness of the street, a different scene met his eyes. Sollux was on his knees, a girl draped over him. Her hands were clasped to her chest, head down, facing towards Eridan, as if to protect Sollux from him. She was wearing a white shirt that John could see was rapidly becoming fuchsia. He recognized her, as the peppy, sweet girl that Karkat had introduced him to a few weeks ago. She must have run between them, John thought, a pit growing in his stomach. Sollux had his arms around her, his hands moving to cover hers, his face buried in her hair.

Eridan had not moved, but the gun had fallen from his hand and onto the pavement. He didn’t seem to notice.

John felt his knees slowly give way as he slid to the ground, pressing his face forward against the rusty bars of the balcony to see. Sollux was rocking back and forth, slowly, Feferi’s hands fluttering against her chest. The blood had covered the front of her shirt and was running down her side in small rivers, pooling on the dark ground.  
And then, as quickly as it had happened, it was over. Sollux lifted Feferi’s body gently off his lap and stared at it. Eridan seemed to come out of a daze and slowly turned, walking back towards where they both had come. He made it barely five steps before Sollux was upon him, tackling him to the pavement and starting to throw punches. He was yelling something intelligible as the two boys wrestled and fought, until suddenly Eridan reached for something in his jacket, moving too fast for John to see, but half a second later Sollux started screaming.

John was eleven stories up, but he heard the strangled yell loud and clear. Without a second thought, he lept up and over the edge of the railing, trying to get to the ground as quick as possible. The screaming didn’t stop until John was two stories from the ground, he didn’t know what was happening, didn’t have time to spare even a backward glance.

Several frantic seconds later John’s sneakers hit the pavement and he spun around. Eridan was gone and Sollux was curled up on his side, surrounded by a pool of mustard yellow blood.

John darted past Feferi’s body to kneel by Sollux. His hands were pressed over his face, covered in blood and he was whimpering softly. John’s breath was coming quickly, he didn’t know what condition Sollux was in and he knew he couldn’t lift him by himself.

“KARKAT!” John yelled, straining his voice as he raced towards the candy shop.

“John?” He skidded to a stop to see Kanaya exiting an alleyway in front of him, looking concerned. “What’s wrong?”

“Sollux--he--I need help, come on!” John said quickly, sprinting back towards the apartment building. Kanaya followed, looking confused but matched his pace nonetheless.

“Oh my god,” said Kanaya, before John could even see the bodies through the darkness. She ran straight to Sollux and immediately hoisted him to his feet by his left elbow, John grabbing his right. He cried out but still didn’t remove his hands from his face. Blood was dripping down his chin and running down the front of his shirt.

Together the three of them stumbled down the dark street, Kanaya and John focusing on moving as fast as they could. Sollux’s hands were still firmly clasped onto his face by the time the candy shop came into view, and standing outside of it, looking confused, was Karkat. He quickly being replaced by pure terror. He held the door open for the three of them to stumble in, at a loss for words.

After the short but difficult trapdoor ordeal, they had hauled Sollux into Kanaya’s house, laying him down on the couch. Sollux was panting, his hands firmly pressed over his eyes and groaning every few seconds

“What happened?” Karkat asked weakly, staring down at Sollux.

“Eridan. He killed Feferi too and then---I don’t know what he did, I couldn’t see.” Karkat shook his head and looked at Kanaya.

“What do we do?”

“We have to figure out what’s wrong with him. Get him on the table, I’ll be right back.”

Karkat and John ran over to the large, wooden table in the corner of the room, sweeping the piles of fabric and half-finished clothing off the edge in a big pile. Karkat lifted Sollux’s upper body, while John grabbed his feet, and they shuffled over and set him down as gently as they could on the flat surface. Kanaya returned with a bright lamp, which she sat by his head.

“We need to get his hands away from his face--Karkat, can you—“ Karkat reached over, a hand on each wrist, and yanked them both away. Sollux screamed again, but Karkat pulled his hands to his sides and pinned them down.

Karkat made a horrified noise as he looked up at Sollux’s face, Kanaya’s eyes widened. Sollux’s face was the last place John wanted to look right now, but even so he found himself peering over Karkat’s shoulder. He could taste bile in the back of his throat. Blood covered Sollux’s face, trickling down his cheeks like golden tears and falling into his gaping mouth, all of it coming from his eyes. Or what used to be his eyes. He had half expected them to look like Terezi’s, crusted and dented, but instead they were gone.

Gone was the wrong word, it would imply a clean, black, empty eye socket. A sliver of Sollux’s blue eye remained intact, the rest of it was piled in chunks and slivers. One piece was hanging out, dipping down towards his chin, still attached by a string of flesh. His red eye was in pieces, several of them seemed to have fallen out, so small black holes littered the crisscross of red chunks. Sollux strained, trying to break free of Karkat’s grasp, John was horrified as to how he could still be conscious, looking like he did.  
Kanaya was very still, staring down at the struggling boy with the broken eyes.

“I need to get them out,” she said quietly.

“Wh..?” Karkat breathed.

“His eyes don’t work anymore. I can’t leave them in there. They’ll get infected, it would kill him.”

“You can’t possibly…we don’t have anything that would work…”

Kanaya’s jaw was clenched.

“John, can you please go and boil some water. Karkat, try to keep him calm.”

John walked unsteadily away from the table towards Kanaya’s camping stove on the other side of the room.

“No. Fuck no we are not doing this, we don’t have any fucking drugs or equipment it’ll kill him.”

“Karkat we don’t have a choice. I’m not letting him die of another fucking infection of all things.”

“And if he dies during the process?”

“Then I’ll know that at least I tried to save his life!” John had never seen Kanaya riled up before, she looked angry extremely dangerous.

Karkat exhaled sharply but ceased arguing, turning back to Sollux. Kanaya disappeared to her room, and John could hear drawers opening and closing. She reappeared a few minutes later with several towels and small tools clutched in her hand. She laid each down on the table and pulled up a stool next to Sollux’s head. Karkat groaned again, looking at the array of objects she had procured.

Sewing scissors, several needles, tweezers, a kitchen knife, a fork and a spoon lay on the graying towel.

“We don’t have anything better.” Kanaya snapped before Karkat could speak. There was a bubbling sound, the pot had come to a boil. Kanaya got the pot and carried it over, then carefully dipped each of the tools in the heated liquid.

“It should sterilize them a bit. Now,” she said, addressing John and Karkat, “This part is not going to be pleasant for anyone. I need both of you to hold him down. John, come to this side of the table. Karkat has his arms, so I need you to hold his head steady.” John nodded shakily and moved to the right side of the table. Kanaya lifted the graying towel from under the tools and then shoved in Sollux’s mouth, effectively silencing him.

John moved his hands on either side of Sollux’s head, keeping it steady. Kanaya was taking several deep breaths. Karkat looked like he was about to either kick the table over or cry and couldn’t decide which. John still felt nauseous. Sollux had stopped squirming and lay still. Kanaya picked up the tweezers, slowly bringing them towards the former blue eye. She moved slowly, but her hands were steady. She brought it down and had barely touched the bit of dangling eye when Sollux arched violently, his back flipping up and head turning to the side. Kanaya’s arm recoiled.

“John!” She yelled, “Keep his head steady!” There was a muffled yelling through the gag. John took a deep breath and positioned his hands back, Karkat and climbed up onto the table and was digging his knee into Sollux’s chest while maintaining the grip on his wrists.

Her hand retraced the path, when she touched the eye John strained his muscles, fighting Sollux’s urge to snap his head and kept it steady. He averted his eyes to what Kanaya was doing, instead focusing on his own task.

Sollux’s torso twisted and shook, jostling Karkat side to side, but he managed to keep him relatively still. Every time Sollux cried out Karkat flinched, as if the pain was being inflicted on his own body as well. Kanaya wore a cold mask of determination, her eyes never straying from her own hands.

It was by far the worst experience in John’s life. Even seeing a girl murdered in cold blood had no compare, there was no way to describe the agonizing few hours that followed. Bit by bit, struggle by struggle, Kanaya cleared and cleaned the blue eye. John’s muscles protested, but fear and adrenaline kept the grip on the boy’s head strong.

Sollux still struggled every time an instrument touched him, but his responses were becoming weaker. Karkat was biting his lip so hard a trickle of blood ran down his chin, and John was just hoping that it would be over, and done until hallway through the cleaning of the red eye Sollux abruptly shuddered and went still. Kanaya paused, her hand halfway to his eye, in surprise. Karkat gave a sharp intake of breath, then immediately pressed his ear down to Sollux’s chest. After a few seconds he sat back up.

“He’s alive.” John exhaled in relief, and turned back. The operation went quicker from there on out, John only having to maintain a loose grip to keep Sollux’s head straight, and Karkat sliding off the table to collapse in one of the chairs, but still not letting go of one of Sollux’s wrists.

And then it was over. The yellow stained chunks of flesh lay in a pile on the old wood table. The gag was removed from Sollux’s mouth and the blood washed off his face. His eye sockets were black holes, empty and vacant.

John wanted to cry, puke and scream all at the same time. He walked over to the couch, his legs trembling violently, and then collapsed onto it, curling up and pressing his face down into the cushion. He felt the tears come, hot and wet, sliding around his face down the smooth material of the sofa. Someone put a blanket on him, but he didn’t raise his face from the comforting blackness.

Kanaya walked unsteadily back towards her room, waves of exhaustion washing over her. She never wanted to see so much as a paper cut again. She fell asleep before she was aware of reaching her bed, physically and mentally drained.

Karkat didn’t move from his position next to the table. He fell asleep with his head in his arms, his legs draped haphazardly over the stool, and one hand still clutching the wrist of his best friend.


	14. Recoil and Revenge

John stirred. He blinked his eyes blearily open to find that his face was still firmly planted in the corner of the couch cushions. He slowly sat up, his face sticky with dried tears. John quickly tried to rub them off before anyone noticed, but the room was silent aside from quiet breathing. He turned to his left and saw the fuzzy image of Karkat slumped over the table, asleep.

After a moment of scrambling to find his glasses, which had drifted between the couch cushions, his vision sharpened and he saw that Sollux remained motionless, in the same position that they had left him in.

He heard soft footsteps from behind him, he turned around and saw Kanaya tiptoeing out of her room, buttoning a long, black coat. When she saw him staring she froze, her eyes wide. John blinked but didn’t say anything, confused as to why Kanaya looked so startled. She carefully lifted a finger to her lips, then indicating Karkat’s sleeping form with a jerk of her head. John nodded and sank back down to lay against the various throw pillows scattered around the couch. Kanaya crossed the room, grabbed something that was standing by the door, quickly concealing it in her jacket and left.  
Karkat woke less than a minute later, shaking his head groggily.

“You up?” He croaked to John.

“Yeah. How is he?”

“I don’t know. Are you hungry or anything?”

“No.”

“Yeah me neither.”

John slid off the couch and slumped on the floor, his head hanging down. His arms were crossed in front of him and he did what he had been trying to avoid and studied them closely. There were only two spots that his original pigment remained, but even those patches had seemed to grow smaller overnight. His fingernails were slightly thicker, and, as far as he could tell, had darkened.

“You okay?” A voice asked from asked from John’s left. He looked up to see Karkat standing over him. The troll then sat down next to John, curling his knees up to his chest. John shrugged.

“Yeah me neither.”

“Is he gonna be okay?”

“I think so. He’s gonna be pissed for sure but I think we can handle it.”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I was right there, I could’ve, I should’ve--”

“No. Don’t beat yourself up about it, it already happened. Besides, you probably would have gotten killed if you had gone down there earlier. No one blames you okay? It’s just another shit thing that happened in our crazy little world.”

“They keep happening.”

“Yeah, I know, you can never catch a fucking break without someone being stabbed in a clichéd dark alleyway.”

“It’s stupid.”

“Yeah.” John groaned and stood up, his clothes wrinkled and smeared with dirt, then walked into the bathroom, leaving Karkat sitting against the couch. He didn’t mean to be rude, but John was feeling overwhelmingly guilty and didn’t want to talk.

Kanaya’s bathroom was a tiny room blocked off by an old mildew-covered shower curtain. The shower itself was nothing more than a large, metal basin and a shower head strung up on the ceiling. In the middle of the basin was a drain, that was there when Kanaya had arrived and no one knew where exactly it went. Sollux had singlehandedly gotten the running water working again for a small part of the city, it wasn’t extremely clean but it was good enough.

He turned the lever and water began sputtering out, banging against the tin of the basin. He peeled off the shirt he was wearing, it was black with a yellow symbol of the roman numeral two. It wasn’t his, but he no longer cared, him, Karkat and Sollux kind of shared clothes interchangeably now. John looked up, then almost jumped, as it seemed someone else had entered the bathroom.

He inhaled shakily, and again met his own eyes in the mirror that was hung on the wall. His face was entirely grey. His lips were darker than his face, but only slightly. He had been expecting it to happen, but he couldn’t help but feel a certain sense of finality. There was no going back now. Even by the strange, miraculous change that he somehow escaped this place, he could never go back to his old life. His breathing started to quicken, he closed his eyes.  
Inhale. Count to three. Exhale. Count to three. Inhale. It’s fine.

After seventeen carefully regulated breaths John turned away from the mirror and back to the shower. He pulled the rest of his clothes off and stepped in, cringing at the temperature. He had gotten used to cold showers, but it didn’t mean he enjoyed them.

When he had endured as much as he could, he stepped out, shutting the water off and grabbing one of the fraying towels, determinately staring at the ground. He exited to Kanaya’s room, shuffling through the large pile of clothes by the side of her bed until he found a few things that looked like they fit him.  
He walked back into the living room, towel slung around his shoulders.

“Karkat?”

“Yeah?” Karkat was back over by the table, sitting in the stool again.

“How long have I...been like this?”

“Hm?” John gestured to his face.

“Oh..a few days. You didn’t seem like you wanted to think about so I didn’t say anything.” John nodded.

Just then, Sollux shifted and groaned. Both Karkat and John jumped. Sollux blinked a few times, his eyelids collapsing slightly inward when closed, then bit his lip.  
John and Karkat exchanged a panicked glance. Did he realize? Could he remember what had happened? John jerked his head to show that Karkat should speak first, who narrowed his eyes as if to say _What the everloving fuck am I supposed to say in this situation?_ John indicated that he should just _Suck it up and get on with it!_ and Karkat cleared his throat.

“Um...” he started.

“I know.” Sollux answered. John and Karkat exchanged another look.

“This is kind of a stupid question but how are you feeling?”

“How you would expect. Can I get off this goddamn table now? I want to fucking sleep on something that isn’t a shit piece of wood.”

“Yeah, yeah of course.” Sollux sat up slowly and slid off the table, stumbling to the side. Karkat jumped forward and caught him, hoisting him back up by his arm. He guided Sollux to the couch, keeping a tight grip on his arm the whole time. Sollux flopped on the couch, turned over, and was asleep a few seconds later. Karkat stayed, staring down at him for a few more seconds before moving to the campstove in the corner of the room. He put up a pot of boiling water and ripped open a few packs of instant oatmeal.

“Where’s Kanaya?” He asked.

“I don’t know. I saw her leave early this morning.” Karkat stiffened. He got up, abandoning the steaming pot and ran towards the door, looking to one side of it.

“Why can’t anything ever go smoothly!” he snarled, stomping back.

“What is it?”

“Her chainsaw’s gone. I think I know where she went.”

“What do we do?”

“I don’t know, go after her I guess? I didn’t think much of Eridan before but..” He gestured to Sollux’s sleeping form.

“I’ll go find her, you need to stay and watch him,” John said.

“What? You’ll get lost twenty feet out the door. You’ve barely been here a month remember?”

The door banged open, interrupting the brief argument. John and Karkat both turned, John’s mouth fell open.

Kanaya was framed in the doorway, a chainsaw in her left hand. Her coat was ripped and hanging in shreds, and purple blood was splattered violently across her entire body, staining her clothes and streaked in her hair. She smiled, blood dripping off her elegant fangs and eyes gleaming.

“Good news,” she smirked. “Bastard’s dead.”


	15. Bartering

“YOU CUT HIM IN HALF?!”

“That’s what I said.”

“In half? Half?”

Kanaya sighed, throwing down the chainsaw and extracting herself from the shredded jacket. “Yes.”

“Well at least he didn’t have any friends,” Karkat said, half to himself.

“No one knows I did it,” Kanaya retorted.

“Thanks, by the way,” mumbled Sollux from the sofa. Kanaya paused, eyebrows raised, clearly not expecting him to be conscious.

“It needed to be done.” She dumped her coat on the now vacated table and disappeared into the bathroom.

“So,” Karkat said, turning to John. “We might as well go out, we’re almost out of food.”

“Ok,” John replied, scanning the room for his hoodie.

“You ok staying here? Kanaya’s in the other room.” Karkat said, leaning down.

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Ok cool, let’s go.” John had found his hoodie and wrapped it around himself, even though he didn’t really need it anymore, no longer having to keep his skin hidden.

The two exited quickly onto the street above, Karkat’s backpack slung over his shoulder. They turned left, heading towards the more populous part of the city. They walked past the apartment building, there were still bloodstains on the pavement.

“I guess Kanaya took care of her.” Karkat commented, noticing that Feferi’s body was gone.

‘Mmhmm.” John said, not wanting to linger more than he had to. They took up a light jog into one of the side alleyways, and this time John didn’t feel so lost. He had been exploring around the city little by little, first with Karkat or Sollux, then on his own for a little bit. After a while they passed by one of the gates into the city, the one that John had come through. He paused in his step, barely illuminated in the slim alleyway and stared. Through the gate he could see the dark purples of the desert splayed beyond, and the outline of the armed guard. It was such a short time that he had been pushed through that gate himself, yet so much had happened. For a moment he briefly considered running at the gate, scaling it and sprinting into the desert. Just to see the wide open space, to feel the wind whipping through his hair.  
However, he knew all too well that if he ever managed to escape in the desert, he would be burned by the sun long before he reached any sort of shelter. Would it be better to go that way? He wondered. To at least be free?

He was startled out of his thoughts by a hand on his shoulder, Karkat looked at him with a sad, sympathetic look, then pulled him out of view. They continued on, John shaking his head, until they reached what Karkat commonly referred to as the crossroads.

It was a courtyard of sorts, which once had been a parking lot. Faint smears of paint were visible under years of accumulated grime and graffiti. Flashes of yellow eyes were all that were to be seen, indicating groups of people milling about. Everyone spoke in whisper. There were at least ten adjoining alleyways and streets to the parking lot, so it was a common meeting and trading place. Karkat stepped up to the nearest group, John trailing behind like a reluctant shadow. Most of the inhabitants of Haven still terrified him, to be honest.

“Whatcha got?” One of them asked, a female troll with long, skinny braided hair. Karkat slid the backpack off his shoulder and opened it in one fluid motion.

“Noodles mostly, a few crackers. Water.” The girl took off a pack of her own and showed Karkat the contents.

“Oh no way is that candy?” He asked, sounding a bit like a kid. The troll grinned, showing shark-like teeth.

“Hell yeah. Two waters, four noodles?”

“Three noodles. They’re not that old.”

“C’mon kid you’re killing me. This is probably the last candy you’re ever gonna taste.”

“Fine, I’ll throw in a pack of crackers.”

“One?”

“One. It’s like ten pieces, not even that much.”

“Fine kiddo. Got yourself a deal.” Karkat reached eagerly towards her pack, the troll’s hand shot out and grabbed his wrist. He sighed and forked over the food, then she proceeded to dump several brightly wrapped pieces of candy into his bag. Karkat bade farewell with a nod, then turned back to John, a huge grin on his face.

“Man, you have no idea how cool this is! I haven’t had candy in years, holy shit.”

John chuckled at Karkat’s enthusiasm, then they both moved on to the next group. Karkat managed to barter several packets of instant oatmeal for one ramen. The troll they were dealing with was a tall, heavily tattooed troll with matted hair and a permanently surprised expression. He never spoke a word, just gestured to various food items and indicated lower or higher value with his thumb.

As part of his “training regime” as Karkat liked to call it, John had to barter with the next person. They moved around the group until he found a guy leaning against the brick wall of a nearby building, a cigarette burning in his lips. He was pleasant enough, but spoke in a weird accent that John couldn’t quite place. He ended up trading two more ramens for several twinkies and some more crackers. When he rejoined Karkat, who had been standing off to the side and looking faintly annoyed, Karkat reminded him to actually barter because “It’s your life on the line, you can’t just hit the fucking supermarket around here, get as much as you can.”

John sighed and agreed, but was still getting used to the whole system, not entirely expecting people to always be exploiting him. Karkat assured him that yes, they were.  
However, by the end of the excursion, the backpack was well stocked with food other than chicken-flavored ramen, and they decided to head back.

Karka was silent, he jogged a few steps ahead of John. They reached the gate fairly quickly, and out of the corner of his eye John saw movement. He reached forward and grabbed Karkat’s shoulder, pulling him to a stop. Karkat spun around, confused, and John raised a finger to his lips and crouched.

A truck could be seen in the distance, bumping along the otherwise empty road and then, after about thirty seconds, skidding to a stop. The back door was opened, and two white suited guards stepped out. John’s stomach flipped as he experienced a terrible feeling of deja vu.  
However, the person in the back of the truck was putting up far more of a fight than John had.

“Let go of me! Get the fuck off!!” A girl shrieked from inside the truck. The guards had each lifted her up by one shoulder, but she was flailing and kicking. Her hands were cuffed behind her back. John’s ears perked up. He knew that voice.

The black-suited guard was opening the gate, and Karkat made a noise of longing in his throat as it slid open, but made no motion. The two guards were shoving the girl forward, one of them removing her handcuffs. She twisted and turned, her hair flailing this way and that, screaming and digging her feet into the gravel. Just before they shoved her inside she made a last, desperate move, attempting to wrestle the gun from the guard standing by the gate. He rebuffed by striking her on the head with the butt of the rifle. John winced, hearing the dull thud. She staggered, and the guard shoved her inside and closed the gate, then pointed the gun at her face.

She proceeded to spit in his face and start to run, still clearly addled, towards where John now knew was main street.

“We have to get her!” He whispered to Karkat, who looked at him like he was crazy, gesturing to the the guards still milling around the gate.

“She’s my friend.” John said, then lept up.

“No wait!” Karkat hissed, but John was sprinting, staying low to the ground and fevrently hoping that no one was looking his way. He caught up to the girl, who had slowed down to a limp, then grabbed her by the shoulder and spun her around.

She caught him with a right hook, punching the side of his face so hard he staggered backwards. She was breathing heavily, clearly terrified, then turned and started running away from him.

“No, come back! Jade!”

She stopped, ten feet away, then swiveled around. She had a bruise across her left cheek, her eyes were wide behind her glasses.

“John…?” She said, half-whispering. “Is that you?”


	16. A Familiar Face

John didn’t say anything. Jade was still for a few more seconds, head slightly cocked to the side, intently staring at his face.

“I--” John began, but Jade lept at him, wrapping her arms around his own and pulling him into a tight hug.

“I knew I’d find you,” She spoke into his shirt, her voice muffled. John relaxed into the hug, his nose buried in her hair, letting relief wash over him. He thought he would never see them again, nothing could describe how good this felt, just to have another body pressed against his.

She finally pulled away, her eyes once again traveling to his face, her arms still entwined in his and expression sad. The aura of warmth that had grown in his chest faded slowly as he realized why she was looking at him that way.

“I know I don’t look much like myself anymore…” he trailed off.

“It’s okay.” She said. “I guess that’s going to be me too.” John suddenly felt horribly selfish, he had been so excited to see Jade he forgot what it meant.

“I’m really sorry,” he started.

“No, it’s really okay. I’m just glad to see you, I missed you so much. We all missed you so much.” She smiled, showing her still crooked teeth and John managed to smile back. His face muscles were stiff, the smile felt out of place on his face. He couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed, it hadn’t been for a while.

“Hey, we need to go.” Karkat said, appearing at John’s shoulder. Jade’s eyes bugged out and she lept backwards, pulling John’s wrist and yanking him away from Karkat. The troll stopped and raised his hands, clearly startled.

“Careful, they’re dangerous!” Jade hissed to John out of the corner of her mouth. Karkat shifted his gaze to John, looking hurt.

“No, he’s my friend! That’s Karkat, he saved my life.” Jade look astonished, her eyes travelling back and forth between their faces.

“But he’s...you know...fully turned.” She said to John. Karkat scowled.

“Ok listen here dipshit--” he started.

“Whoa, whoa easy!” John said, pulling his hand out of Jade’s grasp and leaping between but she had already let out an indignant gasp.

“Dipshit? At least I’m not a monster!”

“Ok, no that’s really not necessary,” John said while pushing back Karkat as he attempted to leap forward.

“What makes me a monster you’re just the same as me!”

“I am not the same as you! Look at you!”

“Guys! Stop!” Jade had lept forward too, John used his left hand to keep her at arms length, he struggled keeping the two apart.

“Look at me? You’re here! You’re in this fucking city you’re gonna look like me In a month tops.”

“I’m still a normal person! You’ve already progressed too far and probably started killing people who knows you probably have a pile of bodies stored up in your--”

“SHUT UP I DON’T KILL PEOPLE.”

“LOOK AT THIS PLACE, EVERYONE IS DEAD, TELL ME THAT THIS DISEASE DOESN’T MAKE YOU KILL PEOPLE.”

“HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT YOU’RE JUST LIKE ME YOU’VE GOT THIS TOO YOU’RE NO BETTER.”

“GUYS KNOCK IT OFF!” John shouted, pushing hard and sending both parties staggering back where they stood, glaring at John.

“Ok Jade I know you’re just scared, but please stop being an asshole.” She opened her mouth, about to reply but John stuck his hand up, silencing her.

“Karkat, I’m really sorry, but can she still stay?” Karkat sighed.

“I’m not going to kick you out Egbert. But can it wait like an hour? I’ve got a recently blinded best friend and a chainsaw wielding maniac to deal with back home.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” John said. Karkat shrugged and left, quickly vanishing back into the alley.

John turned back to Jade, who looked slightly sheepish.

“Let’s walk?” He said.

“Yeah.” He turned and entered an alley that would take them the longer way back home. Jade ran to quickly catch his step, linking her arm around his.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’s kind of a lot to deal with, I know.”

“How have you been?” She smiled. “This seems so weird, it feels like you just left yesterday.”

John almost returned the grin, then began speaking. He started from the beginning, with the almost being murdered, and then Karkat and so on. She interjected every few seconds with gasps or “really?”. By the time he had finished recounting his story they were nearly at the bunker, which John hadn’t stepped in in several weeks. He showed Jade the inside of the clothing store, but no farther.

“Can we go up?” She said, staring at the top of the building once they had gone back outside. It was a clear night, the stars were visible and the street was bathed in moonlight.

“C’mon!” He said, running back inside.

The climb was slightly more perilous this time, with the wind being much stronger than it had the first day he had climbed. Already the idea of being out in the sunlight was strange to John.

They reached the top in hardly any time, Jade scrambling up easily, used to climbing trees and buildings back home. It had been a pastime of the four of them, to scale tall structures and just sit at the top, sometimes not even speaking. He vividly remembered one time when they were sixth graders and John was sure they were going to get arrested after being chased off the roof of the local elementary school. Half of them were missing, but sitting side by side with Jade made John feel more whole than he had in weeks.

“How are they?” He said after several minutes of aimless stargazing.

“They...I don’t know. It was hard, we all missed you so much. I think they’ll be all right. We’re all gonna feel better knowing that you’re not alone.” She paused for a moment and continued. “These past few months have been really weird. When you were...diagnosed I guess, they didn’t really say anything. We didn’t realize until the end of the day, Dave went back inside to look for you after class, but your locker had been cleaned out already.”

“He went in my locker?”

“We all know your passcode.” She smiled, but it faded away fast. “And then finally the principal told us. We went in and made a racket and they finally told us. And after that it was very quiet. Dave stopped talking altogether. Rose got kinda weird and dark. We would hang out like normal and stuff but it would be so different. We’d spend hours just sitting there, staring at stuff. Sometimes we’d go and see your dad.”

“My dad?” John’s voice caught in his throat, he’d avoided these kinds of thoughts on purpose.

“Yeah. He would bake us stuff still, but didn’t talk that much either at first. But then he moved in with Rose and her mom.”

“Rose?”

“Yeah. She was a bit weirded out at first, but him and her mom mostly stayed out of her way. I think Roxy is good for your dad personally, he always seemed a bit happier when she was around.”

John felt tears prick up behind his eyes, he took off his glasses and hastily wiped them.

“Oh no, John…” Jade said, seeing him.

“Fuck,” he muttered, trying futilely to stop them from coming.

“No, no, it’s fine,” She reached out her arm, placing it over his shoulder as John began to shake.

“I--I just--” And then the sobs came, huge wracking sobs that had been carefully repressing the whole time. Jade squeezed him close and rocked gently back and forth and John sobbed into her shoulder. Tears were flowing freely down his cheeks as he inhaled in shuddering breaths. Every emotion that he had been feeling flowed out in a senseless rhythm. His dad, his friends, slowly morphing into a monster. Seeing kids his age murdered. Burying Tavros. The sickening scent of troll blood. Mindfang. Being so scared all the time, not being able to do anything, not being able to exalt the slightest control. The ever growing feeling of being an animal, trapped in a cage, unable to see daylight. Jade just slowly rocked him back and forth, leaning her head against the top of his. She was here too, now she was going to die and change and become different. John wailed and coughed, unable to articulate any of this into words.

But Jade understood just as well.

After several minutes John eventually quieted down, sliding down until his head rested in Jade’s lap, eyes squeezed closed. She absentmindedly began combing his hair with her fingers, tears dripped off the end of his nose, making spots on her skirt. Whether John was asleep or just very still Jade didn’t know. She sat that way for a long time, until her legs began to go numb. She thought about what John had told her, both about the people he had had the luck of meeting and of what was going to happen to both of them.  
She was terrified, and even though she had convinced herself in the ambulance journey here that she was not, it was true. Nothing would be the same again, she thought. But at least I’m not alone.


	17. Hatching Plans

John woke up a few hours before dawn, his head still planted firmly in Jade’s lap. He sat up, rubbing dried tears off his face for the second time that day.

“Let’s head back?” He asked, and Jade nodded. The journey back was silent, Jade contemplating what John had told her. She was a little nervous to meet the other trolls, seeing Karkat again was going to be especially embarrassing considering her previous outburst. They arrived at the Candy Shop, Jade slowly stepping inside with a look of wonder on her face.

“This is so pretty! It’s the coolest place to have a secret room underground.”

“You think so?” She nodded. John shrugged, he himself had found it kind of creepy when he first arrived, but then again Jade had always had the strange talent of seeing the good side of things.

They reached the end of the hallway below the trapdoor to find the door locked. John knocked once and yelled, “It’s me!”. There was a shuffling of footsteps and the door was opened a moment later by Karkat. He saw Jade over John’s shoulder and scowled, turning away and leaving the door standing open. John sighed and followed him inside, hoping the two would start getting along soon.

Sollux was sprawled on the couch, head tilted upward and was fiddling with a faded rubiks cube without looking at it. Kanaya was perched on one of the armchairs, water dripping off her cropped hair and onto the shoulders of a ratty sweater.

John pulled Jade, who had been hovering around his shoulder, in front of him.

“Guys, Karkat probably already told you, but this is Jade. She’s my friend from before I came here.”

“I’m Kanaya,” she said, smiling briefly.

“Sollux.”

Karkat, who had gone to stand by Kanaya, muttered something under his breath. Kanaya socked him in the arm, then turned to Jade.

“Are you hungry? We were just putting up some food.”

“Yeah, thanks,” she said. She crossed the room and sat on one of the wooden chairs near the table. John copied her, but pulled his a little farther away. He didn’t want to have anything to do with that table for a while. In fact, the entire place was becoming more and more claustrophobic by each additional person moving in. They were now short two beds, John longed for the Bunker, which had at least three times more space and at least ten spots to sleep.

“So any news on Terezi?” He asked. Karkat looked up.

“Haven’t heard from her. I don’t even know if she’s gonna do it.”

“I just wanna get back to the Bunker. This place sucks.” Sollux interjected. “No offense.”

“It’s a little small when you all take refuge here,” Kanaya answered, rolling her eyes.

“I just wish she would stop trying to be so fucking elusive...I mean shes a teenager like the rest of us, she just is a little crazier.” Karkat groaned.

“Water’s ready…” Sollux said. All four of them turned to the camp stove in the corner, sure enough a pot of water was bubbling rapidly.

“How did you…?” Karkat asked.

“I smelled it using my new blind guy nose powers.” He said, sitting up and running a hand through his hair so that it stood on end. He turned over the back of the couch to face the general direction that John and Jade were sitting, eyes closed.

“Sup Egbert? Just waltzing around picking up chicks I hear,” He grinned, and John could see with a pang that several of his teeth were missing or broken.

Jade made an irritated noise in her throat, but didn’t say anything else.

“Oh, Jade,” he continued, “I’m sorry in advance for how stupid I look right now, but as you probably know I nearly just got murdered.”

“Yeah, John told me,” She said quietly. Sollux then opened his eyes, and she recoiled back in her chair. John only flinched slightly as the two gaping holes stared at him. They seemed bigger than his eyes had been, deep craters sunk in the boy’s slightly scarred face.

Sollux chuckled slightly, imagining Jade’s reaction, and closed his eyes again, sinking back down onto the couch. Karkat had joined him now that he had sat up, and all five of them sat in silence, the only sound cooking noodles.

“Did you eat the candy already?” John finally asked as Kanaya began dishing out noodles in chipped bowls.

“You kidding?” Karkat answered. “I’m saving that shit. It’s gold man, gotta lock it up. Here, careful, it’s hot,” he added in an undertone as he placed a steaming bowl into Sollux’s hands. John got up and moved toward the camp stove, grabbing two bowls of noodles for him and Jade.  
She accepted the bowl and began slurping the noodles down ravenously, John remembering that it had probably been the first time eating anything all day.

“Sorry, I should have gotten you something to eat earlier.”

“S’okay. This is good,” She said in between bites. Karkat was the first to speak a minute later.

“Hey, Jade was it?” She nodded. “I’m sorry about earlier I shouldn’t’ve said that stuff.”

“No, it’s okay. I started it.”

“Did you guys brawl or something?” Sollux interjected.

“They were trying but I kept getting in the way,” John answered.

“Good. Kk would’ve gotten his ass kicked anyways.”

“Hey!”

“I agree with Sollux.”

“No one cares! I could totally take her anyways.”

“I doubt it. Ya should’ve seen her back home, she was beating people up left and right.”

“John! That was one time…”

“That was at least three times.”

“You beat up three people?”

“Hey, that’s coming from the girl with the chainsaw.”

The melee of voices rose, jumbling together along with giggles. John smiled, despite the crazy things that had happened not that long ago, everything seemed pretty okay. Kanaya did look a little strained still, and Karkat was glancing at Sollux a few times more than necessary but they still laughed along with Jade and himself.  
Everyone finished their meals quickly, and the bowls were gathered by John who dumped them in the shower. He couldn’t remember whose turn it was to do the dishes, but he was pretty sure it wasn’t his.

When he got back, Jade tugged on his sweatshirt.

“Can I sleep somewhere? It’s like, three in the morning.”

“Oh, yeah I forgot, sorry. Kanaya?” She looked up.

“Where should she…?” he said, gesturing at Jade.

“Oh, she can take my bed.”

“Really?” Jade said. “Thanks!”

“Oh, so she gets a bed,” Sollux grumbled.

“Dude, I’ve been sleeping on the floor for the past like month,” John reminded him.

“Follow me, I’ll show you where it is,” Kanya said, standing and gesturing to Jade, who rose from her chair.

“By the way, thank you! All of you, you guys are really awesome,” she said then followed Kanaya to the bedroom.

John, now by himself in the corner of the room, got up and joined Sollux and Karkat on the couch.

“So is she hot?” Sollux said after a moment. Karkat rolled his eyes.

“You’re such an asshole.”

“Yeah, yeah I was kidding.” he replied, sounding slightly deflated. Kanaya returned, shutting the door behind her.

“Scoot over,” She said to Karkat, who slowly wiggled to the right. Kanaya flopped down and brought her knees up to her chest, resting her forehead on them.

“Are you okay?” Karkat asked. She shrugged.

“What you did was justified,” Sollux said. “You don’t need to feel guilty about it.”

“I know. But still…”

Karkat struggled to extract his arm from between them, John, Kanaya, Sollux and Karkat were wedged together quite tightly, but he managed to wrap it around Kanaya’s shoulders.

“Hey, it’s--”

BANG!

The door crashed open, causing the four of them to jump and Sollux yelp “Who?”

“I’ll do it!” Terezi stood framed in the doorway, dragon-headed cane clutched in her fist, glasses glinting dangerously.

“Fucking shit Terezi you could’ve just knocked…”

“I’ve decided,” she continued, ignoring Karkat, “that based on all the evidence and through careful consideration that Mindfang is guilty, and I will help you dispose of her.”

“Well that’s a relief at least,” Sollux said. Terezi bounded to the armchair and sat down, crossing her legs and staring intently in their general direction.

“The investigation starts now,” she said. “The first thing we have to do is locate the perpetrator, now this isn’t going to be easy because I’m pretty sure there isn’t a soul in Haven who knows where she resides. We only know of two locations that she’s for sure visited. The first one is the Bunker, we know that she’s been there at least twice, maybe more, but we don’t know that she will return now that she knows you haven’t been there in weeks. We could wait around, but probably won’t be worth the time or energy.”

“So what’s the second place?” Sollux asked. Terezi grinned and held up her left arm in response. Sollux raised his eyebrows questioningly, waiting for a response.

“Her arm,” Karkat said hastily.

“Ahh.”

“Her what?” John asked, confused.

“Mindfang lost an arm, many years ago.”

“She had both arms when I saw her.”

“Yeah, that’s because it’s robotic. A very intricate, complicated prosthetic that you could only find in one spot. Which means we have to see….”  
Sollux nodded in response.

“Zahhak.”


	18. The Cat Girl

“How long do we have until the sun comes up?” Karkat asked, looking up at the greying ceiling.

“At least three hours. Plenty of time. Sollux, you know where he is?” Terezi replied.

“...Yeah.”

“Well then you’re with me. Let’s go.”

“Yeah I don’t think that would work out too well. You know what they say…”

“Huh?”

“About the blind leading the blind.” There was a very awkward pause.

“Wait you’re not….?”

“It was Eridan. A few days ago. Kanaya killed him after.”

“Oh,” Was all she said for a moment.

“I can still find it though. Zahhak’s place.”

“Good. How are you doing with it?”

“I’m managing.”

“That’s good to hear. Hang around me a little longer, I’ll show you what you need to know.” She grinned, and then stood up.

“What are we waiting for?”

“Wait, what about Jade?” Kanaya asked, jerking her head in the direction of the bedroom.

“We can’t bring her, she hasn’t changed and it would just draw attention,” Karkat said rather grumpily.

John turned and walked to the bedroom, pushing open the door to find Jade sprawled across the bed, face smashed into the pillow. He shook her shoulder.

“Wha’sit?” She asked without opening her eyes.

“We’re going out for a couple hours...stay here okay? There’s food in the cupboard if you’re hungry or whatever.”

“Mm’k.” She turned over and was snoring within ten seconds.

John found a black and grey striped sweatshirt lying on the floor and pulled it on, then exited the room, closing the door softly behind him. The group was waiting for him, Sollux’s arm wrapped around Karkat’s, Terezi with her ridiculous teal and red ensemble and Kanaya in a long black coat that John suspected held several concealable weapons.  
They exited the candy shop and began walking to the right, per Sollux’s directions. Terezi kept sighing as she had to slow down her extremely fast paced jogging so John, Karkat and Sollux could catch up. Other than that, they kept the noise to a minimum as they would their way through alleyways, buildings and around the city. John was impressed by Sollux’s memory, he knew that he could never remember this many turns and twists without seeing them, but, without fail Sollux led them to the right spot.  
They stood in the middle of what was probably once a textile factory of some sort, the rusted and ancient machines looming over them. The air was thick with dust and, though there was no one else around, John swore he could hear faint clinking noises coming from somewhere below. Sollux stood in the middle of the room.

“Is the door behind me?”

“Yeah.”

He pointed to his right. “That way.”

The group advanced, weaving through the still machines until they reached the back wall. There was a set of double doors, which Karkat and Terezi pulled open. There was a rush of musty air as the doors opened to reveal a staircase leading down into inky blackness. Sollux reached out and grabbed Karkat’s wrist again, tugging him forward.

“Let’s go. But be quiet.” The look on Karkat’s face made it all to clear that he thought going down the shady-looking staircase was a very bad idea, but he proceeded anyway. John was the last to enter, sparing a glance at the dusty room behind him, which suddenly seemed much more friendly and welcoming, but still turned and followed his friends as they began their descent. John was on the fifteenth step when the doors slowly swung shut. Everyone paused, it was suddenly pitch black.

“What?” Terezi said, as she nearly ran into Karkat.

“The door closed, we can’t see anything.”

Terezi giggled. “Well that’s no excuse to stop. Here, grab on, all of you.” John could hear jostling as Terezi switched positions with Karkat to take the lead. John reached his hands forward until he came in contact with Kanaya’s shoulder, then grabbed on.

“Everyone here?” Terezi asked.

“Yeah.”

“Ok, let’s go. Those who are overly dependant on eyes careful not to trip.”

They continued awkwardly down the stairs in, as Karkat put it, “like a fucking conga line on a stairway of death”. John managed to only trip twice, which was a major achievement considering how he normally functioned without vision, and thankfully Kanaya was quick enough on her feet not to stumble forward into Sollux. A domino effect would be of even less help than usual in this particular situation.  
After about fifteen minutes of muttered “fuck” and “that’s my foot dumbass” and “don’t trip don’t trip”s, the five of them stood at the beginning of a long, dark hallway. The clinnking and tinkering noises John had heard earlier were now more pronounced. What was it Zahhak did again? John wondered, thinking back to that conversation with Karkat on the roof several months ago. Oh yeah, he remembered. Robotics.

“We go down this hallway.” Sollux said, and they all began walking forward. Their footsteps echoed around the walls, The ceiling was high and crisscrossed with rafters. They were halfway down the hallway when Sollux suddenly stopped.

“Watch out for the cat girl.” He whispered.

“What?”

“The cat girl. She’s going to come. Be careful.”

“What the hell are you--?” Karkat began but then abruptly stopped, because a figure had just dropped from the rafter above to land in a crouch in front of him. Karkat leapt backwards into Kanaya, who pushed him back upright. John could see the silhouette of the figure over Karkat’s head as they straightened up, but it was hardly a difference in size, they couldn’t be more than four feet tall.

“Who are you?” Her voice was soft and whispery, yet childlike.

“It’s me,” Sollux answered. “We’re here to see him.”

The girl giggled, but it wasn’t a sweet sound, more like the kind of giggle that you would hear echoing around an empty house in a cliched horror movie.

“It is you, but you’re very different! There’s something missing.” All John could see of here were the glowing eyes. They moved closer.

“Who stole your eyes? Was it the prince? Did he take your eyes? You deserved it you know, messing around with her, who do you think you are, you know that everyone you touch dies, did you not learn your lesson the first time around? I know why you come here.”

Sollux’s hand was laced around Karkat’s arm and he was gripping so tight his knuckles had turned white.

“Hey, back off!” Kanaya had stepped between the two of them, looming over the cat girl.

“I know about you too!” She crooned. Judging by her voice she couldn’t have been more than seven or eight, but what she was saying was beyond what a normal child could. “I know that you killed him, you sliced him to bits and the worst part about it was that you liked it. That’s what’s scaring you, you actually liked it.” Kanaya’s face had paled, and she swung out at the child with her fist, but suddenly the girl was swinging by the rafter above.

“You can’t catch me!” She said in a singsong voice. Terezi scowled and placed a hand on Kanaya’s shoulder. “Leave her alone. Let’s keep going.”

“Let’s keep going!” The girl echoed, swinging back and forth from, not her arms or legs, but what seemed to be a mechanical tail protruding from the back of her jacket.

“She’s not usually this bad,” Sollux said, shaking slightly. They continued on, trying to ignore the presence of the girl, who was now standing and running lightly on the rafters above their heads. John could tell that Karkat was nearly reaching his breaking point as the girl began to hum a string of insults. He finally stopped, wheeling around and staring up at the ceiling.

“Ok freak, listen up. You need to shut the fuck up or get down here right now, what is your problem?” She did a dainty leap and landed in front of him.

“My problem? I don’t have a problem, but you do, I know your secret, I know that you’re going to--”

“SHUT UP!” Karkat screamed, his face becoming flushed, hands balling into fists.

“We’re almost there okay? Just ignore her,” John said, pulling at Karkat’s shoulder with one hand and dragging Sollux forward with the other. Kanaya was wide eyed and silent, Terezi grim.

John charged forward, breaking into a run as they reached the end of the hallway, then turned into a large room. The cat girl scuttled past them and ran forward until she was out of sight. John’s eyes were wide as he took in the room, it was dimly lit by flickering fluorescent lights, and they entire room was filled with rows of metal tables and benches.

Each table was piled high with metal parts, hundreds of screws in neat boxes, scrap metal and carefully welded joints discarded left and right. The group moved forward, weaving through the tables until they reached the source of the noise.

Zahhak was in the center of one of the tables, gently tapping at what looked like a kneecap with a huge mallet, using precision that would seem impossible for someone his size. He was the tallest troll that John had seen so far, even though he didn’t look too much older than any of the others. His arms were bulky, and his hands huge but gentle. His hair was pulled back into a sloppy ponytail and wore cracked glasses. Just then the cat girl appeared, leaping lightly onto the table.

“What is it Nepeta?” He asked.

“We have guests. Do you think they would like tea?” Equius looked up.

“I thought I told you the deal was off, Captor.” Sollux stiffened.

“That’s not why we’re here,” Terezi answered instead.

“We need information on Mindfang."


	19. Zahhak

“Mindfang? Why are you coming to me?”

“Don’t patronize me. I’m the reason she lost her arm, you know.” Terezi retorted.

Zahhak smiled, his black lips opening to reveal rows of broken teeth.

“I am aware. Quite the pair you were. Things got so quiet after the two of you...matured a little.”

“Where is she?” Terezi’s glare was cold.

“What, you can’t find her?” Nepeta crooned, lightly hopping onto the table and crossing her legs. “The great bounty hunter can’t even find one little--” Equius held up a hand, silencing her.

“I am not at liberty to reveal her location. We have a deal, and it would be within our best interests to hold up our side of the bargain.”

“Oh?” Terezi said, as she began pacing slowly in front of the table. The rest held back, watching her. “What’s she offering you?”

“Safety. Secrecy.”

“Everyone knows you’re here.”

“Not necessarily. This is the largest crowd we’ve had in years. And besides, I owe her my life.”

“I thought you’d repaid that debt already. You saved her. You gave her an arm. You let her loose again.”

“I did not--”

“Don’t tell me that you didn’t know exactly where she was going. You let her loose on me, remember? If it’s anyone that you should still owe a debt to it’s me!”

“I have yet to create robotic eyes, unfortunately for the both of you, but is this really about my arrangement with Mindfang anymore? I thought you were stone cold, Redglare, but I see you still harbor resentment.”

“We can see right through you,” Nepeta added, tilting her head to the side and smiling. “You’re too scared to do anything. Too scared to fight back, too scared to even take her arm, you made Megido do it and it killed her! It messed everyone up that’s what it did, all because you were scared of spilling a little blue blood.” Terezi had stopped pacing, her hands were clasped firmly behind her back.

“H-hey,” Karkat said, stepping forward. “I think we should go. If he’s not gonna tell us, he’s not gonna tell us lets not fuck with stuff anymore.” He reached forward, grabbing Terezi’s elbow, and pulling her back.

“Yeah, let’s--” Kanaya began but Sollux stepped in front of her.

“Wait, what did you say about Aradia?” John saw a startled glance pass quickly between Kanaya and Karkat, then both of them turned to Sollux. Nepeta didn’t reply, just stared at him.

“I said,” Sollux repeated. “What did you say about Aradia?” His stare was blank, not quite facing her, but John could see that he was tensed up.

“Just something I hearrd,” Nepeta said, softly rolling the rr’s. “You wondered why it happened right?” Sollux gave a slight nod, his jaw clenched.

“Megido was the one who took the spider’s arm. It wasn’t pretty but Mindfang had already killed too much. Megido and Redglare were a team for a while. It was Redglare’s idea, initially. The whole plan, involving two people. Seamless, but with slight chance of retaliation. Redglare was all set when she got scared. Tripped up a little.”  
Karkat squeezed Terezi’s elbow, obviously telling her not to interject.

“She backed out, ran away and left Megido.”

Terezi was shaking her head slowly, but making no noise.

“And your precious Aradia wasn’t stupid, but she was headstrong. Thought she could pull it off without repercussions. Well she went ahead with the genius little plan and before you know it Mindfang’s lying in a pool of blood.”

“She wouldn’t kill anyone.” Sollux said, beginning to shake slightly.

“It was never meant to kill. Just to hurt a teeny bit.” Nepeta giggled, clearly enjoying every bit of storytelling. Equius was stone faced and silent.

“Mindfang lived. And she wasn’t stupid, Aradia being the only one who carried out the plan made it painfully obvious what would happen next. A warning was sent to Redglare.”

Terezi’s hand shot up to cover her eyes.

“Aaand I think you know the rest.”

“That is enough.” Kanaya stepped forward and yanked Sollux away from the table, pulling him down the hallway. John quickly followed, Terezi and Karkat behind him.

“There is someone who has the information you need.” Equius said, just loud enough for Terezi and Karkat to hear. They turned.

“The Sylph knows everything.” Karkat pulled Terezi out of the room. A faint tinkering sound could be heard as Equius got back to work.

 

The journey back was in complete silence. John felt like an outsider, having nothing to do with any of the events that had been thoroughly examined back in that horrible, dank room. They arrived back at the candy shop just in time, the sky becoming slightly lighter. Jade was still asleep on Kanaya’s bed, and John was exhausted but he knew that it wasn’t the right time to check out. Sollux had disappeared into the side room the moment they had arrived, and Terezi was sitting on the edge of the couch, head in her hands.

“That’s-that’s not what happened. That’s not how it happened I didn’t just run away I didn’t think she would go through with it.” She was saying quietly. Karkat was sitting next to her, looking visibly upset but had also no clue on how to deal with her.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Kanaya said, her voice calm. “Aradia was being rash, she should have waited for you.” Terezi shook her head, hard enough to cause her glasses to fall to the floor.

“I’ve killed a lot of people. I thought it was okay, growing up here, but I never meant to kill my friend.” Karkat reached over and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She remained with her head in her hands, not saying a word. John got up and wandered into the other room, trying to clear his head of the fact that most of the people living with him had killed other people at some point in their short, teenage lives.

What he found instead of a break was Sollux, sitting in the corner with his legs drawn up to his chest. John froze, could he leave discreetly?

“Is someone there?” Sollux asked, his voice muffled.

“Y-yeah, it’s just me, I’ll go if…”

“Nah it’s fine. I don’t want to be around them either.” He raised his head, turning it to about the general direction John was standing.

“Piece of shit tear ducts still work…” Sollux muttered.

“Yeah…” was the only thing John could think of to reply.

“You can sit down if you haven’t already I seriously don’t care.” John slid into sitting position, his back against the wall.

“If you don’t mind me asking, how long ago did she die?”

“Aradia? That was about two years ago I think. I don’t really know, time seems to mesh all together in here. This is just the first time it’s been mentioned.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.” There was a pause. John stared at a crack in the off-white ceiling.

“I don’t think I can talk about it yet. Maybe when Mindfang is--I don’t know. I’m sorry I sound stupid right now.”

“It’s fine. I’m still getting used to the fact that you guys all kill each other here.” John said, sighing slightly.

“It’s kinda fucked up isn’t it?” Sollux chuckled. “Ya know, in my short time I spent thinking about my future, I never even considered that I would end up here.”

“Yeah,” John said. “Me neither.”


	20. Chores

John woke the next morning pissed off, having accidentally fallen asleep scrunched up in the corner of the concrete and mildew-covered bathroom, and being subsequently woken up by Karkat slapping his face with a dishrag.

“Up and at ‘em princess,” he said, throwing the rag to cover John’s face. John groaned in response.

“Yeah, I know,” Karkat replied, “but Kanaya’s pissed at the state of this place, she says we have to clean up and also that it actually has been your turn to do the dishes all week so if you would please stop just placing them in the shower for someone else to do that would be nice.” Karkat said, in a near perfect imitation of Kanaya’s eloquent tone.

“Ah,” John said, taking the dishrag off his face and pulling himself to a standing position. He exited the side room in the hopes of finding food, but instead ran into Jade carrying a huge stack of dirty bowls.

“Hello! You missed breakfast.” She grinned, pushing past him to the shower. John sighed and looked around, Kanaya was bustled past him with a huge pile of clothes in her arms, Terezi had an old broom that she was using to sweep, but really just kicking up more dust than necessary.

“John!” Kanaya called from behind him. “Dishes!”

“Yeah, I’m coming.” he said and retreated back towards the basin that was now full of dirty dishes. He reached up and pulled the chain, cold water began splattering down.

“Need help?” Sollux’s voice said from next to him.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll wash you rinse.”

John picked up a bowl and started washing half-eaten noodles out of the bottom.

“So about yesterday….”

“Yeah?”

“I was wondering, what was up with the girl?”

“There was a lot up with her.” John handed the soapy dish to Sollux who ducked it under the thin stream of water.

“It’s like she was a kid, and also wasn’t. Like she didn’t sound how young she looked.”

“She isn’t.”

“What do you mean? She couldn’t have been more than, like, eight.” John picked up a handful of bent forks. Sollux cleared his throat.

“It’s like this. You know that the disease kills us, yeah?”

“Yeah. It takes over, the physical changes are half from the disease itself, half from the body trying to fight it off,” John said, quoting a school pamphlet.

“Yeah so one of the effects is that it...slows down the aging process? Like just physically, mentally it doesn’t really do much but after a few years, mostly around when your horns grow all the way in, you stop aging normally. Like for example I’m probably not gonna look much older than this.”

“Do you die after you stop aging?”

“No, not necessarily. It’s different for everyone, a couple of other factors correspond to when you die, some people can last for ages. Like the girl for example.”

“So she stopped aging?”

“Yeah. Shitty story for her too.”

“How?”

“Ok well just take Terezi for example.” John glanced over his shoulder to see Terezi now swinging the broom around, whacking it against the couch and then on Karkat’s head.

“She came here when she was eight,” Sollux continued. “She’s seventeen. Hasn’t aged in four years.”

“Wow, really?” Karkat was trying to wrestle the broom from her grasp, she grinned and treated it like a challenge, hitting him over the head again.

“Yeah. So if she’s been here that long and she looks like that imagine how long Nepeta has been here.”

John thought back to the strange, small girl with the wide eyes and unsettling grin.

“She was just a toddler.”

“Yeah, from the little I could gather from Equius. Youngest ever diagnosed, she grew up here. At least its a valid reason why she’s so fucked up.”

“No kidding.” John shuddered, trying to picture a child having to live in this place but failed. They finished the rest of the dishes in silence, John quickly leaving the gray concrete room to the jumble of voices outside. The broom incident between Karkat and Terezi had turned into a wrestling match that had caused two chairs to be overturned and a pissed-off Kanaya restricting the two to separate corners.

“What happened?” Sollux whispered to Jade as he walked out of the bathroom, fingertips lightly brushing the wall for guidance.

“They were hitting each other with the broom?” She answered, half smiling and carrying an armload of wet clothes, which she proceeded to hang from the makeshift clotheslines that had been strung haphazardly from wall to wall across the room.

“So Terezi are you just moving in now or what?” Kanaya asked, removing the broom from her hands.

“If you don’t mind. I think it will make it easier if we’re all in this Mindfang thing together.”

Kanaya sighed and turned around to see everyone else. “Ok I call a team meeting right now. Everyone get on the sofa.”

“Oh, are we a team now? What’s our mascot?” Sollux said sarcastically, shuffling forward to reach the sofa.

“I vote Karkat as mascot!” Terezi answered.

“Shut up,” muttered Karkat from the corner. Jade finished hanging all the laundry up, the room now resembled a chaotic jungle of wet tshirts and pants.

“Ok everyone be quiet.” Kanaya’s voice said. John couldn’t see her from his position on the couch, an obnoxiously red shirt blocked his view but he was pretty sure she was sitting on the armchair.

“So last night sucked. That’s kind of all there is to say on the matter, we tried to get information and we ended up just getting generally humiliated.”

“But we did get a clue,” Terezi said, now sounding serious. “Equius mentioned that the Sylph could help us.”

“I don’t think that would be a wise move.” Kanaya’s voice was clipped.

“She knows everything that happens, she would know where Mindfang is. I don’t know why we didn’t go there first.”

“You know why. I just don’t think we should go to the West side and poke around.”

“We wouldn’t be poking around, I know where to find her. You don’t have to come.”

“Are you serious? Like you would survive in the west side alone.”

“That’s where I grew up if you haven’t forgotten.”

“I’m coming too,” Karkat said.

“Me too!” Jade added. “And John.” John turned and glared at her, going into gang territory was not an idea of a fun night out in the city, but she shrugged and jerked her head to say ‘well why not?’.

“You guys aren’t leaving me here alone…” Sollux added.

“Fine. You can all come under one condition,” Terezi said.

“Which is…?”

“You have to listen to me. If you thought main street was bad, you haven’t seen anything yet.”

“Meeting adjourned?”

“We leave in half an hour.”

Everyone got up, pushing through the lines of clothes to try and find sweatshirts and sneakers that fit. Kanaya had gone to the wardrobe and pulled out a huge piece of paper that had been turned into a homemade map.

“So where exactly are we headed?” She was asking Terezi in an undertone.

“The 8ball. It was an old nightclub, located around here.” She pointed to a section in the map.

“Ah. This is going to take a while, isn’t it?”

“Yeah especially if we want to avoid any trouble. Staying off the direct routes would be best in a group like this." The two girls got up and walked to the door, Terezi picking up her dragon-headed cane that she had flung there earlier. She pulled on the top and it came apart, a concealed blade hidden inside. Kanaya was poking back around in the wardrobe and a minute later pulled out her chainsaw. Thankfully the purple blood had been washed off of it.

“Is that...really necessary?” Karkat asked, glancing uneasily at her.

“This might save your ass, so yes it is. And everyone, come here a moment.” Kanaya reached behind her and pulled out a handful of blades, wrapped in cloth or sheaths. She handed the first one to John, he took it, it was about as long as his forearm.

“I--I can’t really be around knives right now,” Sollux was saying, shaking his head as Kanaya tried to press one in his hand. John tucked the weapon into his jacket, the weight of it pressing down onto his chest. He locked eyes with Jade, who looked nervous yet determined, a black hoodie thrown over her face to try and conceal her non-gray skintone.

She gave a quick smile, fleetingly reminding John of the olden days where she would show up at his house at one am, climbing his tree and knocking on the window saying “Come on sleepyhead! Let’s go on an adventure!”


	21. Dick Alleyway

“So where exactly are we?” Sollux’s whisper floated through the darkness.

"Beats me," Karkat answered.

"We're about to go down that alley covered in dicks." Terezi said from the front of the small group

"Oh, okay," Sollux chuckled.

"Great place." Jade glanced at John, who shrugged. They'd been walking for around two hours, this was farther than he'd ever been. They had passed main street a while ago and now were in an industrial looking area, filled with crumbling high risers and rusted cars. They had encountered several people at first, passing by in small groups, wearing dark clothing, eyes the only illumination of their faces, but less often now.

Kanaya and Terezi took up the lead, occasionally referencing the homemade map or glaring back when anyone talked too loud. The borrowed knife still felt heavy in his jacket pocket, reminding him just enough that where they were going wasn't a desirable place to be. Jade was nervous as well, John could tell as she hadn't spoken a word since they left the candy shop, only stared ahead with her jaw locked, sparing an occasional glance at him.

"Ah, here we are," Karkat said as they turned left. "Dick Alley." John couldn't help but giggle, it wasn't always clear that Haven was mostly inhabited by teenagers, but the alley was a large indicator. The backs of buildings that enclosed the alleyway were completely painted over with nothing but caricatures of penises left and right. Nobody could keep a straight face as they walked along, Jade even breaking out a smile as Kanaya visibly rolled her eyes.

"Do you see ours?" Sollux asked, grinning.

"Umm...yeah! Right where we left it." He pointed proudly at two dicks drawn among the others, in red spray paint.

"There's mine!" Terezi said, gesturing to her left. They could see several abstract lines scrawled in teal that didn’t resemble anything seen in the material world.

"That one looks like a tentacle," John laughed, pointing. Karkat and Sollux instantly quieted.

"What?" He asked. Sollux turned to face him.

"Didn't I tell you? It's a side effect." He said solemly as Karkat nodded. John instinctively grabbed his crotch.

"What?!" Sollux and Karkat remained straight-faced for about three more seconds before bursting into bouts of laughter, Karkat even doubling up.

"You--should've seen your face."

"Did he grab his--?"

"Yeah!"

"Oh my god I can't believe that worked." John rolled his eyes and stepped back to fall in line with Jade, who was giggling. Karkat and Sollux didn't stop laughing until they reached the end of the alleyway, even though John didn't think it was all that funny.

After another hour they all ducked inside an abandoned bus station, sitting along the molding benches and eating some crackers and dried fruit. Kanaya lay out the map, staring intensely. John scooted over to join her on the floor, having just fallen through his bench due to the wood collapsing.

"So where are we?" He asked, looking at the network of lines and words written in Kanaya's slanting handwriting.

“About here,” She said, pointing at a spot around the middle of the map.

“That reminds me, I should draw this station it. Could be useful, not for the daytime but maybe storm refuge or something,” She said, glancing up at the plastic roof. She reached down the front of her jacket, pulled out a pencil from somewhere, and began drawing. She drew a little box, marking in the benches and overhanging in precise detail, then neatly lettered “Bus Station—storm refuge”. John observed the rest of the map and noticed that the buildings and various streets were drawn with equal precision and detail.

“You’re really good at this,” He said. Kanaya smiled sadly.

“It’s what I did before I came here. Made maps.”

“As a job?”

“No, it was more like just a hobby. I wouldn’t make them of actual places, I would make up fictional lands and worlds and make maps of them. Sometimes I would even paint them on scrolls. I got all this fancy calligraphy stuff too.” She laughed. “That was a bit of a waste of money.”

“How old are you? I mean, you don’t look that much older than me, but just something Sollux said and I was wondering.” Kanaya paused in her writing.

“I’ve almost lost track,” She said quietly. “But I think I’m 19.”

“Oh. Wow.”

“Yeah I still look fourteen don’t I?”

“…yeah.” Kanaya shrugged.

“It used to bug me but I think I’ve gotten used to it. Won’t be around for too much longer so all in all not a big deal.”

“Okay,” Terezi said, bounding to her feet. “We’ve got a long way to go, back on the road.”


	22. Endings and Beginings

As they traveled farther and farther east, the streets began becoming dingier and dingier. It started off as litter, a few empty cans or ancient newspapers tossed here or there, then escalated. Mounds of crap were piled everywhere, from old toys to broken glass to bits of paper and food wrappers. The whole area began to smell increasingly vile, everyone but Terezi resorted to breathing through their hands as they stepped through pile after pile of trash. It wasn’t the only thing stinking the place up, but John tried to avoid thinking of what else the dark lumps in the street might be. He definitely had seen blood, however, crusted and dark but of blue and green color. 

Jade’s hand was clenched to his arm, above his elbow, and had been for some time. Karkat and Sollux both looked uneasy, they group had stopped talking over an hour ago. 

Only Terezi looked unfazed, stepping over piles of muck with precision, as if she could see them. She had mentioned that she grew up in the East side, John was admiring her more by the minute. Every instinct he had told him that it wasn’t a safe place to be. It had grown eerily quiet, the only sound was footsteps and quick breathing, they hadn’t seen anyone else for quite some time. From what he had gathered from Kanaya and Terezi talking quietly earlier, the East side was more populated, people just tended to stay out of sight. 

John looked up at the sky, and the multitude of stars and was thinking how, looking up, he could almost forget where he was when a scream tore through his ear. His head snapped as he turned to Jade, whose grip had become vice-like. She was gasping and looking down to her right. Kanaya pressed forward, her eyes wide and knelt down next to Jade, staring at something that at first glance John mistook as a pile of rags until it moved. 

Looking closer, John could now see that it was a troll, with long pointed horns and wild, matted hair. She was covered in dirt, her clothes torn. She extended a shaking arm, which John could see Jade had just bumped into. 

“Help...me…” Her voice was a wavering whisper. 

“How long have you been out here?” Kanaya said quietly. 

“Days,” She said, “Shade...so burns not that bad...but I don’t want to die here.” 

Karkat knelt beside Kanaya, putting a hand on the girl’s forehead. “How far along are you? Can you walk?” 

 

She shook her head. 

“Where do you live?” 

“It’s...not far. Just around the corner...in the basement...that store.” She pointed, her hand shaking, ahead of them. 

“Ok,” Kanaya said, “We’re gonna take you home.” 

She then pulled the girl into a sitting position and, with Karkat, pulled her upright. She was the same height as John but looked almost hollow, her cheekbones and collarbones protruding sharply from her skin. Kanaya reached below her and scooped her up, bridal style. The girl’s head lolled forward as Kanaya walked easily, the girl seemed to weigh  
almost nothing. The rest of the group trailed behind her. 

“What’s wrong with her?” John whispered to Karkat. 

“She’s dying.” Karkat answered, staring at the ground. 

“But why? What happened?” 

“Nothing happened. She just got old and now she’s gonna die.” 

A pit formed in John’s stomach. 

“What part of fatal disease didn’t make sense to you?” Karkat continued. “None of us are sticking around for long.” 

John didn’t answer. What had seemed so distant was now coming into focus. Forget the skin color and the eyes, he should have been worrying about the dying part, which had seem so glossed over by everyone else. 

They reached the corner, which used to be a jewelry store, and went inside. The glass counters were all smashed, but the shards of glass had been swept away. In the back there was a staircase down, and they took it. They reached a small door, which everyone ducked through and emerged into a good-sized room. The floor was concrete but covered in throw rugs, a couple of ratty pieces of furniture sat in the middle. In one corner of the room were two beds, each with quilts that looked to be sewn out of pieces of old drapes or carpet. Kanaya crossed the room and gently laid the girl down on one of the beds. 

“Thank you,” She said. “I had to get water...two days ago….but I couldn’t make it back.” 

“But don’t you live with someone?” Kanaya asked, gesturing to the other bed. “Why couldn’t they get it.” 

The girl gave a sad smile. “He didn’t make it either...a few months back...that bastard always said he’d outlive me….liar.” 

Terezi slung her backpack forward and removed one of the water bottles, coming forward and pressing it to the girl’s lips. She drank greedily, slurping it up. 

“Do you need food?” Jade asked, coming forward. The girl shook her head. 

“It’s a little late for that, I think. But I do have food.” She pointed across the room to a cupboard leaning against the wall. 

“We had a lot...please take some.” 

“No, we couldn’t possibly--” 

“I’m going to be dead very soon. I won’t eat it. You’re good people...please.” 

Karkat crossed the room and quickly began stuffing the contents of the cupboard into his backpack. 

“What’s your name?” Kanaya asked. The girl’s eyes fluttered. 

“Mierfa.” 

“I’m Kanaya.” 

“Pretty name...but I’m afraid I can’t stick around...so tired.” 

“She’s advancing stages,” Sollux muttered out of the corner of his mouth. Kanaya nodded, then gently tugged the quilt out from under Mierfa and pulled it over her. 

“You go to sleep now, all right? It’ll all be fine when you wake up.” Mierfa’s eyes were already closed, but she nodded and smiled. 

“Night,” She slurred, then fell silent, asleep. Karkat returned and Kanaya gestured to leave. 

“We have to come here on the way back. To bury her.” She said to no one in particular, then turned toward the stairs. 

Just as John was about to leave, he heard Mierfa softly cry out. He turned around, but her eyes were still shut. Karkat grabbed his arm. “They all make noise, there’s nothing left we can do.” John felt sick to his stomach as an image of Jade flashed into his mind, Jade in the bed with the closed eyes and emaciated face and tangled hair. 

“Is...is that what happens every time?” He asks, not wanting to know the answer. 

“Yeah. Dying’s not pretty,” Sollux answered, “Sometimes it takes weeks.” 

Somehow John had always pictured dying of the disease like you just suddenly fall over and you’re gone, something of that nature, not anything like what he had just seen, and to hear that the process was drawn out. 

“I don’t--I can’t--” he stuttered, trying to articulate his feelings into words. 

“Yes, it’s terrifying, we get it. The life we got dealt sucks ass, but we can’t do jack shit about it,” Karkat answered. “It’s just better to try not to think about it.” 

“I’d rather be killed,” he said, half to himself as the walked along the dark street several silent minutes later. 

“Right there with you,” Karkat replied. “But sometimes you just don’t get a choice.” 

“Quiet,” Kanaya said suddenly, as Terezi paused. “We’re here.” 

John stared up. “Here” turned out to be a building, low and flat, the windows blocked by black curtains and lettering that read “8Ball”. 

“She’ll have guards,” Terezi said. “They already know we’re here.” 

“So?” 

“So we’d be dead if she thought we were a threat. Let’s pay a visit, shall we? Stay close.” The group clumped together, Kanaya turning and bringing up the rear, John ending up shoved between Sollux and Jade. Terezi pushed the smooth wood door, it opened soundlessly. 

The interior was dim, a few flickering lights lit up the several abandoned chairs and tables. A pool table could be seen in the corner, the color on the balls faded. In the middle of the room a staircase down could be clearly seen. Terezi started forward, but just as she was about to step down an arm swiped in front of her. 

She stepped back and a man dressed in all black seemed to melt out a chair. At least John thought he was a man. He was tall, and by the little he could see under the man’s wide-brimmed hat he looked older than anyone in Haven so far. Only one of his eyes glowed, the other was covered in a dark patch. 

“What business do you have down there?” He asked. His voice had a smooth, casual tone. 

“I need to speak to the Sylph. Who are you anyways?” 

“The name’s Slick. And who might you be?” 

“Redglare. You’ve heard of me.” Slick bared his teeth in a grin. 

“Yes I have. Good little bounty hunter you are, then. Are you armed?”

“No.” 

“Yes you are. You don’t live here by being dumb. Leave your weapons on the table. All of them. If we find one while you’re downstairs, consider your throat slit.” Terezi shrugged and threw her cane on the table. 

“Do as he says,” she addressed the rest of them. John removed the knife from his jacket with shaking hands, dropping it on the table. He could feel Slick’s eye boring into him. 

“Allright. You can head down, but I don’t expect any trouble.” 

“Oh, you know me, Jack.” Terezi said pointedly. “I like to lead a quiet life.” 

She started down the stairs, Slick settling back down in his chair. The rest of them followed. The staircase curved as they descended, John could begin to hear what sounded like soft jazz music. 

“Well, I guess this was a nightclub,” Karkat commented nervously. The bottom of the staircase arrived quicker that John would’ve wanted it to, and they walked into the spacious room. It was dark and hazy with smoke, half of the room covered in round tables and chairs, the other was just floor. A fragile-looking piano sat in the corner of the room, and jazz music was playing out of unseen speakers. 

“What do we have here?” A woman’s voice said. John could see her outline, someone in a wide-brimmed hat and jacket sitting with her feet on the table, legs crossed. “Some more of your...servants?” An elegant spiral of smoke poured out from her mouth as she spoke. Her eyes glittered from beneath the brim of her hat. 

“That’s enough Snowman,” Another voice said, coming from what looked to be a large, ornate chair in the middle of a small stage in the center. 

Terezi stepped forward to the woman lounging in the chair. 

“Aranea, it’s been so long.” 

The woman smiled, showing long, pointed teeth. 

“If it isn’t my adopted little sister. What brings you here?” 

“You know why.” 

“Yes. And I do agree, it’s high time we discussed the matter of Mindfang.”


	23. Dealing With a Sylph is Dangerous Business

“How long has she been at this?” Karkat muttered grumpily, tipping his chair back so it stood on two legs. 

“Beats me. Like half an hour I guess,” Sollux answered from next to him. John exhaled, staring at the figures of Terezi and Aranea deep in conversation across the room. He turned to Jade, who had removed her glasses and was polishing them on the corner of her sweatshirt. She looked up, catching John’s eye and giving a quick grin. 

The atmosphere in the room was tense, Snowman sitting just a table over, glaring at them beneath her hat and occasionally exhaling a puff of smoke in their direction. Kanaya was twitchy, turning to glance at Terezi every few seconds, subconsciously reaching her hand into her jacket, probably in search of some form of weapon. The thought of all of the sharp objects upstairs made John feel slightly more at ease, but it clearly terrified Kanaya. 

“Why did she say ‘adopted sister?’” Jade asked after another moment of silence.

“Terezi and Vriska used to live down here, when they were little. I think Aranea took them in at some point. Arguably too late, however.” Kanaya answered quietly, leaning forward. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well, you’ve seen how unstable she is. She has her whole gimmick of doing what’s right and restoring justice but in reality she’s killed almost as many people as Mindfang has, I would say that she’s even more dangerous considering she doesn’t understand herself.” 

“Understand herself?” 

“She grew up here, you can’t survive on this side of main street by being even relatively sane. From what I could gather, had her first kill at age seven, and developed her persona as Redglare not long after. Aranea did take her in, but it was too late.” 

“Too late for what?” Terezi said, appearing suddenly over Kanaya’s shoulder, who froze. 

“Nothing. Are you done?” 

“Almost, I need the map.” Aranea stood a few feet behind Terezi, arms crossed. She was dressed inn skintight black material that looked like leather, from boots to long gloves. Her hair was wavy, cascading down her back and horns looking like a slightly longer version of Vriska’s. Her lips were blue, from lipstick John supposed, and pressed together. An aura of power radiated off her form, making her seem taller and powerful. John’s first instinct, seeing her up this close, was to back away slowly. 

With a rustling of papers, Terezi produced the map and handed it backwards. John noted that, like Mindfang’s, Araneas nails were filed to appear as claws. She unfolded and  
quickly glanced over it, smirking. 

“This is exquisite detail. Very nice work.” Her words sounded like a teacher praising a particularly good homework assignment, out of place in the basement of a nightclub. She then beckoned Terezi away again. 

“Why can’t we know what they’re saying again?” Sollux asked, fiddling with his hoodie string. 

“Because we’re “untrustworthy”” Karkat said, adding air quotes. Sollux made an irritated noise in his throat. 

“All right,” Terezi said, walking back towards the table with the map folded in her hand. “Let’s get out of here.” 

“Fucking finally,” Karkat muttered, jumping up. 

“Redglare.” Aranea said just as the group reached the stairwell. “It would be most wise of you to comply with our agreement.” 

Terezi nodded, then turned and started up the stairs. Karkat and Sollux, then Jade and Kanaya and finally John followed suit, rising away from the smoky room with the soft music and intimidating females. 

They exited the stairs to find Slick in the middle of the room, swinging Kanaya’s chainsaw around and making explosion noises. 

“Psssh! Boom! Gotcha!” 

Kanaya cleared her throat loudly. Slick jumped and dropped the chainsaw, it clattered to the floor. Rolling her eyes, Kanaya strode forward and collected it. 

“Sorry about that,” he was saying, “I didn’t think you’d come back. Most don’t. They just go down wantin’ to see her about some problem or another and then next thing ya know I’m hauling ‘em out to the dumpster.” He chuckled. “Guess you guys are pretty lucky. Your stuff’s on the table over there.” 

“Yes, thank you,” Terezi said pointedly. Slick fumbled with his hat for a moment then sat down where he had been earlier. 

“Let’s get out of here,” Terezi hissed. “I’ve got a spider to squish.” 

They stepped back out into the moonlit street, John inhaling deeply. The air still stank, but it was a relief from all the smoke. Terezi had quickened her pace, knuckles clenched around her dragon headed cane and lips pursed. 

“So where exactly is she? Tell me you know at least that,” Karkat asked. 

“Somewhere no one would think to look. Up.” She answered without looking back. 

“Allright? Whatever that means…” Karkat muttered but she didn’t respond. 

“What agreement did you two have?” Kanaya was saying quietly. Terezi shook her head. 

“Nothing important.” 

“Please tell me there aren’t going to be repercussions from this. That’s the reason we have to get rid of Mindfang in the first place.” 

“No, I’ll be fine. It’ll be fine.” 

“You’ll be fine? What exactly did you promise her in exchange for Mindfang’s location?” 

Terezi whipped her head around, the lenses on her glasses flashing in the moonlight. 

“Lay off me, okay? I’m doing this for you. For all of you, so you don’t get killed. This had nothing to do with me in the first place, but I choose to help you. Don’t complain  
about how I do it.” 

Kanaya opened her mouth, then closed it again without saying anything. Expressionless, Terezi turned and began walking again. Everyone followed suit, exchanging glances. 

They walked for another hour. As they got farther and farther away from the 8ball, more people started appearing, passing the group in the street or simply skulking around in corners and alleyways. Usually these shadowy figures made no sound, just stared from glowing eyeballs that hardly illuminated strange and dirty faces. Kanaya, Terezi and Karkat melded the group into a circle form, shoving Jade, John and Sollux in the middle of them. All three were brandishing knives, Kanaya and Karkat had thrown hoods over their heads, but Terezi remained in her red and teal. 

“Nobody should try anything...Redglare’s known well enough around here...but just in case,” Kanaya whispered out of the corner of her mouth. “Jade, keep your skin covered. John, try to not let them see your eyes.” They nodded and flipped their hoods up, Jade ducking her head. 

Sollux had switched to grabbing onto John’s arm when Karkat moved to the back of the group, he clenched tightly above his elbow, clearly tense. 

“It’s usually me on guard too,” He whispered into John’s ear. “Kinda nice this way...I just wish I could see if one of them was gonna jump.” 

“They aren’t doing much,” John answered quietly. “Besides, I’d probably scream or some shit so you’d be able to tell.” 

“Thanks.” 

“I’m glad my weenie-ness is convenient.” 

Sollux chuckled, then winced as Karkat socked him in the back. 

“Shut up! Both of you!” 

Terezi turned to the right, skittering down a thin, slanting alleyway. 

“Okay,” She said, “We’ve gotta stop, the suns’s gonna come up soon and there’s still a ways to go. There’s a couple of buildings around here we could crash in.” John glanced up, the sky was an alarming shade of purple. 

They ended up sleeping in the corner of a shop, squished together in a large pile of teenagers and weapons. John had uncomfortably realized this. having awoke in the middle of the night (day, he reminded himself, middle of the day) to find Kanaya’s chainsaw an inch from his face. He gingerly extracted his hand from the pile of limbs and torsos to grab the handle, and push the chainsaw out to the middle of the dusty floor. Sunlight was streaming behind the curtains, casting two thin rays of light across the floor, but thankfully not reaching the corner. It had been a gamble sleeping in here, as they really didn’t know how far the sun would creep in, but everyone had elected Jade sleep the farthest from the corner and everyone else make do. 

John sighed, he still wasn’t completely used to sleeping when it was so bright out. He stared down at Jade, who looked innocent and younger without her glasses, which were in the center of the room with John’s, Terezi’s and the chainsaw. She lay slumped on the floor, hair moving ever so slightly with every exhale. She looked so human, so out of place, but it was still a relieving sight. 

Kanaya’s legs were thrown over Jade’s, dark slim jeans with elegant boots. Her torso lay overlapping John’s her body moving with every one of his exhales. John lay on Karkat’s back, who in turn was curled over Sollux’s. Terezi lay slightly apart, the tip of her horn linked in Kanaya’s, which would probably be entertaining when they woke up to find themselves accidentally latched. She slept on her back, a knife clutched to her side. John looked at it sadly, reminded of what Kanaya had explained earlier. 

However, for now at least, while the sun streamed outside, they were protected by a fortress of heat and light. Just for a few hours, they could all just lay and breathe as one creature, one who was dreaming and unafraid. 

John closed his eyes, letting the breath slowly escape for his lips. His problems would return, but they belonged in a world of purples and blacks, not this strange yellow and orange state. For just a few more hours, they were safe.


	24. Spider

“Ow, fuck.” 

“Just pull it out!” 

“No--it won’t--” 

“Ahh! Stop jostling.” 

John opened his eyes quickly, turning his head. Terezi and Kanaya were both looking highly uncomfortable, trying to separate Terezi’s horn from the loopy bit of Kanaya’s. John didn’t exactly see why it was a big deal, but every time the two horns touched in the slightest big both girls winced. Horns were really sensitive, he guessed? Time to add that to the list of stuff to look forward to. NOT. 

After several more quiet curses and stomach shuffling, Terezi managed to extract her horn. It was dark out, the store retaining its gloomy feel. John turned his head back to the ceiling, enjoying his position on the small of Karkat’s back. Karkat, he assumed, was still asleep judging by the steadiness of his breaths and the not shoving John over. 

“What’s going on?” Sollux muttered, arm thrown over his eyes, Karkat’s face planted on his stomach. 

“Horn stuff,” Kanaya answered. 

“Oh.” Sollux said. “So would you say you were….horny?” He grinned slyly. 

Kanaya groaned and chucked a tube of lipstick at him. It bounced off his arm, rolling down to hit Karkat in the nose. 

“Wha..?” He said, blinking his eyes open. “I know I’m not the fashion expert but my lips are fine without this shit all over them,” He spoke, his voice muffled by Sollux’s shirt. 

“Oh, are we up now?” Jade asked from next to John. 

“I guess?” John answered. “It’s dark out at least.” 

“Yeah,” Terezi said, standing up, “We should get moving.” 

After several seconds of shuffling and wiggling, and a few misplaced hands, everyone was on their feet, picking up glasses and discarded weapons. Terezi picked up the bottom part of her cane, sliding the top part with the knife into it until it clicked. Her expression became serious. 

“It’s not far now,” She said quietly as they headed out the door, “But it would be best if we didn’t talk.” 

The group shifted back into the formation they had been in before, Terezi, Kanaya and Karkat serving as the perimeter. John kept his eyes trained on the back of Terezi’s neck, watching as her hair bounced slightly against her grey skin, trying not to think about the amount of slinking figures that dotted the streets. It was several minutes of this ceaseless marching when they passed it. 

It was unclear whether the body was male or female, the face was slashed across and disfigured. Blood was caked across their face and chest, which were oddly bloated. The  
blood was green, a shade darker than Kanaya’s and stained the surrounding pavement as well. 

John began to inhale and exhale rather quickly, Karkat prodded him in the back. 

“Don’t look. Just keep your eyes forward. Keep walking.” 

“We’re close,” Terezi said. 

Jade grabbed John’s other arm. 

“Maybe this wasn’t the best idea,” She whispered, “Coming along.” John only gulped and nodded. He was still breathing too quickly. Just look ahead, he told himself over and over, look ahead. Keep walking. It’s okay. 

“We’re here.” 

She said it quietly and calmly. John stopped and stared up. They stood at the base of a huge building, at least twenty stories. It was gray and crumbling, the metal skeleton exposed in a large portion of the right side. 

“She lives here?” 

“Way up there. This is the correct building, Kanaya?” 

“That’s what Aranea marked on the map, if she hasn’t led us astray.” 

“No, the map is right.” 

Kanaya looked like she wanted to question Terezi further, but stopped herself, remembering the earlier outburst. 

“So do we just...walk in?” Karkat said. “No offense but that sounds like a pretty bullshit plan.”

“She’s not going to be expecting us. Or anyone for that matter. I know her.” Terezi answered, walking forward to where the doors stood ajar. 

Karkat sighed and followed, keeping his knife in the air. 

They entered the lobby, John gingerly stepping over broken marble tile. The room was large and looked like it had been elegant at one point, but was covered with a layer of grime. There were remains of a fountain in the center, whatever statue had been in the middle was gone, but the chipped basin remained. John stepped forward to the edge of it, looking down to see piles of dirty coins. He picked one up, an odd pang in his chest. 

Who threw this penny here? He wondered. Were they alive when all of this started? What happened to them? 

“Hey, Egbert, c’mon.” Karkat was saying. John turned to see that the group had made it all the way across the lobby. He turned and jogged towards them, slipping the penny in his pocket. Everyone was gathered by the back wall, a hallway branched off, leading to a stairwell. 

“So no elevator?” Sollux said. Terezi grinned. 

“Nothing wrong with a bit of exercise.” She started up the steps, taking them two at a time. 

“A bit of exercise”, however, turned out to be eighteen flights of stairs. Everyone but John seemed content with this, taking the steps at a light jog. He assumed that living in Haven for extended periods of time had strengthened the endurance of several of the trolls, and he knew that Jade did a lot of cross country back when that sort of stuff was normal, but he didn’t realize exactly how out of shape he was until now. 

“Geez Egbert, how are you not dead yet?” Terezi called down to John, who once again was lagging a full flight of stairs behind the rest. 

“That would be thanks to me,” Karkat answered. “But seriously pick up the pace.” 

Jade, taking pity, turned around and lightly skipped down the steps. 

“C’mon! You can do it!” She said, grabbing his arm. “Just remember that time when me and Rose signed you guys up for that half marathon.” 

“That--was--not what I---thought you had--signed me up for,” John said between breaths. 

“Yeah, that was the point silly! But you and Dave ran the whole thing.” 

“I was--trying to avoid--my dad and--Dave’s bro.” 

“Yeah, that is a good incentive for running. The whole town was there that day, that sure was interesting.” 

Surprisingly enough Jade’s chatter did help keep John’s mind off running up the flights of stairs, but not in the thinking about endurance kind of way. He remembered that day, Jade showing up at his house at eight in the morning in jogging clothes telling him that he better get dressed in something athletic quick. He had gone upstairs, kind of confused, reappearing a few minutes later in old sneakers, finding Jade sitting at the breakfast table with his dad. 

He remember showing up at the race, thinking it was just some weird sprint thing and then seeing the words “Half-marathon.” He had tried earnestly to back out but Rose and Jade had each grabbed his arms and pulled him forcibly to the starting line. Dave was there too, wearing really short shorts and looking sullen. He gave a sort of shrug to John and the race started. 

And then they reached the eighteenth floor, stopping suddenly. John’s legs ached. Terezi’s joking demeanor that had been apparent before was gone. She held her cane in both hands, walking out of the stairwell. They were in a hallway with faded and tattered carpet that once looked to be red. Terezi took a deep breath and turned back towards the five of them. 

“This is where I leave you. Mindfang is my responsibility and mine to kill. I’m not having any of you become collateral damage.” 

“Are you serious?” Kanaya said, “Why even bring us along then?” 

Terezi shook her head. “It was a momentary lapse of judgement. I need to fix these, do not follow me.” She turned and walked down the hallway. No one moved. 

The hallway was long and full of doors, the building had probably been a hotel at some point. Terezi walked for a few feet then stopped, turning to face a door on her right. She took another deep breath, then raised her foot and BAM. She kicked out at the door, but it didn’t open. She raised her foot again. BAM. BAM. BAM. With each kick she lashed out harder and faster until the door finally swung open. Terezi straightened, tugging her hair back from her face and re-adjusting her glasses. She held her cane behind her back and walked slowly into the room. 

The only thing John could hear was his own breathing as he stood, frozen in place. Karkat and Kanaya, however, had no such problem. They moved right after Terezi had entered, walking lightly down the hallway, weapons drawn. Jade, with a half-glance at John, grabbed Sollux’s arm and followed. They approached the door, which was slightly open. Moving to a crouch, John could clearly see inside. 

Mindfang’s room was dark, the windows covered in heavy, black fabric, the floor dark and covered in various items: clothes, books, knives, what looked like broken glass. Mindfang stood among it all, in jeans and a tshirt, her hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. She was standing with her legs slightly apart, clutching a knife in her metal fingers. 

“Well if it isn’t my little sister,” She sneered. “What a delight it is to have you drop by.” 

“Aren’t you the slightest bit curious as to how I managed to find you after all these years?” Terezi’s voice was steady, and betrayed no emotion. She had removed the concealed knife from her cane. 

“Well I was a teeny bit curious, but you’re not that stupid and I knew you would find me eventually.” 

“You probably know why I’m here then.” 

“What, because I killed Taavros?” She said mockingly, rolling out the a. “He totally had it coming though, you can’t blame me for that.” Vriska stepped slightly to the left. Terezi mimicked her. 

“That’s not all of it. You threatened my friends.” Terezi and Vriska had begun slowly circling, eyes fixed on each other, knives pointed ahead. 

“That idiot in the bunker was your friend? You didn’t even know him, he thought I was you!” 

“That’s irrelevant.” 

John mentally hit himself in the forehead for being such an idiot that day. Who in their right mind would just let a random person into their house right after someone had been murdered there the day previous? 

“Oh, did you mean I threatened your little boyfriend? Little being the literal sense.” She giggled. Karkat stiffened. Terezi remained silent. 

“Didn’t think I knew about your little fling, huh? Well you were wrong, little sister. I saw how you thought you could be normal. Be in normal relationships.” Vriska picked up her pace, Terezi matching her, each girl leaning forward and sinking down in their steps. It was like watching two wild animals stalk their prey, the sister’s movements were fluid and graceful. 

“You knew this disease didn’t make us monsters,” Vriska continued. Terezi’s grip on her knife handle tightened. “But you knew that you still were. You were always afraid of that, weren’t you?” 

“I’m not the monster, you’ve always been the monster.” 

Vriska’s voice grew quieter. “Not always, hermanita.” Terezi froze, back to the door and Vriska lunged forward, leaping across the short space. 

“Ahh!” Karkat yelled and burst into the room, shoving Terezi out of the way onto the floor and ducking under Vriska’s knife. Terezi landed in a crumpled heap, Vriska in a crouch. 

“Oh so that’s the way it is,” She said, hair falling into her face as she straightened. “We’re gonna play the game aren’t we? A little bit of cat and mouse?” Her eyes had widened, mouth gaping in a grin, she looked deranged. She lunged and Karkat again, who, always quick on his feet, jumped backwards toward the door. 

“Fast one aren’t you?” She said, then before anyone could move a muscle, she chucked the knife she was holding forward. Karkat let out an anguished scream as it buried itself in his left shoulder. He fell backward, eyes bugging out. Vriska reached down and picked up another knife, advancing. Kanaya pushed past John and ran into the room. 

“Enough,” She said in a tone that was quiet, yet commanding. Karkat was whimpering quietly, hands fluttering at his shoulder. 

Vriska stopped mid-step, looking surprised. 

“Kanaya what are you--” John had noticed from the corner of his eye the red and teal figure slowly moving but he didn’t think it’d be so-- 

Vriska gasped, just a slight “ah” as she looked down and the slim blade now protruding from her chest--and then blue was spreading across her shirt and moving way too quickly--she swayed alarmingly--Terezi didn’t move her face was grim and emotionless her hand still clutched on the back of the knife now through her sister’s chest and John was breathing way too fast again and Karkat was on the floor and Kanaya’s eyes were wide and-- 

Vriska fell forward onto her hands and knees, a spray of blue blood falling from her mouth. She made a choking noise. Terezi stood without moving, her hand still extended in front of her. Kanaya fell to her knees, crawling forward and pulling the bleeding girl into her lap. Vriska buried herself in Kanaya’s chest and Kanaya grabbed her hands and held them far too tightly for Vriska to ever have been just a friend. And there were very quiet voices, one of them was whispering, their heads just masses of black hair tangled together. 

Cobalt blood dripped onto the dark floor. Kanaya rocked back and forth, but it was over.


	25. Aftershock

John stared at the body. Kanaya had gently lifted Vriska off her lap several minutes ago, and was now leaning over Karkat along with Sollux and Jade, but John was having trouble moving his legs. Her eyes were still open, yellow and wide. Her mouth was slightly ajar, and stained blue with blood that trickled in a thin stream out of her lips. Terezi had fallen to her knees with a thump about twenty seconds ago and sat, motionless. John began to shake slightly, Vriska had been awake just a few minutes ago. She had been awake and jumping and-- 

John exhaled slowly, then glanced at Karkat. His jaw was clenched, Kanaya carefully dressing the wound while Jade and Sollux applied pressure. He knew he should be over there, at least for support if nothing else but his feet remained planted in the same spot. 

Surprisingly, several seconds later he found his knees firmly planted to the floor. The impact had jarred him, causing his view to shift to the window that overlooked the city. There was a thick black curtain pushed aside, to block out sunlight when the time came, but it was not needed now. The stars twinkled aimlessly over the crumbling tops of buildings. 

He heard a soft exhale. John looked back down to see that Terezi had slumped forward even more, her head nearly reaching the bloodstained floor. John moved closer to her, his hand raised, unsure of whether a friendly gesture would be helpful. He slowly put his hand to her shoulder lightly. She responded by collapsing, head landing solidly in John’s lap, the rest of her body curved. She wasn’t crying or even shaking, just utterly still. 

Just then a sound ripped through the night, one John hadn’t heard in so long. 

“Is that...helicopters?” He croaked. Kanaya stiffened. Sure enough she heard the humming rhythm of propellor blades above them. 

“Shit.” She muttered. “Not now, not now, we’re too close.” 

“Kanaya--is it?” Karkat asked. 

“It’s a sweep.” She said. “Supply drop, doesn’t happen that often. And when it does all hell breaks loose let me tell you.” 

Sollux groaned loudly. “This is really fucking terrible timing. They drop the goods not that far away and that means that as soon as those fucking copters leave there’s gonna be a mob of starving people fighting over the good stuff.” 

Just then there was a loud crackling sound, then a male voice echoed throughout the city. It wasn’t unlike a school announcement, John thought offhand, but on a much greater scale. 

“Attention inhabitants of Quarantined Sector SW-79 under Project Haven. We are here to inform you that the Haven Project is being shut down under orders of the United States Government. This will be the last remaining supply drop to be deposited in the city.” 

There was another crackling noise and the voice faded. The helicopter blades were louder, they seemed to be passing just above the ceiling. No one said anything for several seconds until Jade spoke. 

“Shut down? What does this mean? What about us?” Her voice hung in the empty air. Kanaya shook her head, without an answer. 

“They won’t tell us anything.” Sollux said irritably. “There must be a good reason they’re cutting us off even more.” 

“But what is it?” Kanaya finished. 

John swallowed, a lump in his throat, and stretched his neck once again to look out the window. 

In that same moment, hundreds of miles away, Rose Lalonde awoke with a start.


	26. A Day in the Life of Two Completly Normal Teenagers

Three weeks earlier 

 

The melancholy sound of a violin pierced through the early morning air. Rose opened her eyes slowly, the classical scales blaring uncomfortably loud in her right ear, and stretched her hand out without looking. Her fingers scrambled across the small table beside the bed, her hand eventually coming in contact with her phone. Barely glancing at the touch screen she shut the alarm off and turned back to flop her head on the pillow. Her ceiling became so much more interesting when there were things she needed to do. 

After another three minutes of forcing her eyes to look at the ceiling the alarm went off again, and this time Rose slid out of bed, grabbing her phone to slowly walk across the cold floor and out to the kitchen. The phone was blinking yellow already, Dave must be up early she guessed. She quickly unlocked it and opened Dave’s snapchat of his coffee cup while entering the kitchen to grab her own. She picked a mug out of one of the many cabinets and filled it with piping hot coffee, set to start brewing ten minutes ago. There was no way her mom would be getting up anytime soon. Holding the cup with one hand, she quickly snapped a picture of it, sending it to Dave with no caption. 

It had become a sort of routine between the two of them after Jade had left. It was a way to reassure each other that they had kept their promise, that they had in fact gotten out of bed and were going to try their best to go through whatever the day had in store. There had been several times where Rose was tempted to quit, to just wallow in the tangled sheets and old stuffed animals in her room for hours, but didn’t want to feel the shame of letting down the one person she trusted. 

Sipping the black coffee slowly, she headed back to her room to get dressed in some sort of black and purple ensemble. School hadn’t even started that long ago and she was already known as the weird kid who sat in the back, wore strange clothes and didn’t talk to anyone. That was the way she liked it. Most of the time. 

At 7:20 she applied the last coat of dark lipstick, tucking the small tube in her sweatshirt pocket and headed out the door, locking it behind her. Thankfully no one else was outside this morning, the whole neighborhood was coated in a thin layer of mist and general unpleasantness. She hated when the neighbors stared, it wasn’t her fault that she lived in the huge, weirdly shaped mansion. Two blocks and five minutes later she sat in the cold seat of the school bus, staring out the window with earbuds eliminating the annoying background chatter. 

They arrived at the school after another fifteen minutes, pulling up in front of the large brick building that served as both the middle and high school for the area. Just one more year until she could be in the high school part of the building. Rose exited the bus silently, joining the masses of students milling around the front entrance, laughing and talking with friends. She spotted Dave fairly easily, he stood apart from the crowd looking slightly uncomfortable and leaning against the base of a large flagpole. She walked over and bumped her arm with his, a sort of non-verbal greeting. Just then the bell rang, causing Rose and Dave to sigh in unison. They turned and began walking towards the open doors, Dave removing his shades to slip them in his pocket. Back in sixth grade he used to argue with teachers when they insisted he take them off, but could never actually give a good reason why he needed to wear them. After a while he just gave up. 

Rose had considered bringing up her hypothesis as to why Dave felt the need to wear dark glasses as a way to feel secure, she knew that no one would take her seriously as a middle schooler wearing an impressionable amount of dark makeup. 

She continued down the hallway on the way to English, looking up to see that Dave had drifted away without her noticing. He had developed a recent tendency for slipping away when no one was paying attention. Rose often missed when Dave had been always chattering about something, even to the point of extreme annoyance, but was still better than nothing at all. Rose allowed herself to be carried along with the tide of chattering middleschoolers, their conversations blurring so that individual words could no longer be heard when she realized she was going down the wrong hallway. The very wrong hallway. 

It was too late to turn, and trying to fight backwards through the mess of teenagers would be far too much effort, so she continued ahead, trying to fight the nauseating feeling that always seemed to appear inside of her when she glanced at the door to the testing room. It was white and plain, nothing out of the ordinary. It was currently empty, as the next testing date was not for a few weeks, but Rose could still hear the woman’s voice. 

“All right, this will sting a tiny bit,” She had said. Rose rolled her eyes, it was the same dialogue every time she came in. The nurse acted like this was her first blood test. She turned to watch the small sample of red liquid weave its way out of her inner elbow to the syringe. The nurse quickly removed the needle, dabbing at the small prick of blood and applying a band-aid. 

“Now wait just one moment dear,” She said, turning towards the machine that sat next to Rose on the table. The blood sample was inserted. There were a few small beeps, then a light on the machine flashed green. 

“All right, you’re free to go. Glad this isn’t becoming a trend,” She said, the last bit to herself. 

“What was that?” Rose asked. 

“Oh, well one of the students actually tested positive for contamination. I was afraid that there would be more, but everyone else seems clear.” 

“Oh.” 

Rose left the room, walking down the line of kids waiting to be tested on the way to seventh grade math. Someone barreled into Rose, knocking her sideways into a locker. 

“Ahh! Sorry!” Jade said, grabbing Rose and pulling her back up. “You just never respond to your name.” 

“It’s too common,” Dave was saying from the other side of Jade without glancing up from his phone, “We need to re-name you something cooler.” 

“Yeah! You need a nickname,” Jade said excitedly, “Like a cool alter ego.” 

“Well why don’t you guys work on that,” Rose said, smiling, “But I have to go take a math quiz.” 

“Oh shit yeah. Math quiz,” Dave said, glancing up. Rose turned and led the way into the classroom that they had just reached, Jade pausing a moment to squeeze Dave’s arm before running down the hallway yelling “Tell me what it’s on at lunch!” 

They entered the classroom and sat in their usual spots in the back of the room. Everything was normal until they got to lunch and couldn’t find John. 

“He’s probably studying or something, right?” Jade said. “He occasionally acts somewhat studious.”

“Yeah, that huge nerd,” Dave replied, but Rose didn’t say anything. There was a sinking feeling in her stomach that she had tried so hard to repress. 

Everything got worse when, after 6th period Rose ran into a worried-looking Jade who nervously said that John hadn’t shown up to math class either. 

“Maybe he had to go home? His dad might have called in or something,” She said quickly. They met Dave at his locket, which was next to Johns, quickly delivering the news. They waited until the entire hallway had cleared, leaving behind only scattered pieces of paper and making halfhearted excuses as to why John wasn’t there. 

Finally, Dave opened John’s locker with the code that John had always tried futilely to keep secret. The door banged open to an empty cavity. Everything had been taken out. Rose’s chest was tight, heart beating faster than normal as they raced to the principal’s office, sneakers squeaking on the hard floors. 

It couldn’t have been John, not him, contamination was something that happened to other people, in other schools, in other places, not here and especially not one of her friends. 

And then, three months later it happened again. The short period when Jade was still here and John was gone was strange, to say the least. Jade filled the air with empty words that spilled quickly out of her lips but didn’t mean a thing, and Rose’s mouth felt like it was zipped closed. 

There were two tests in between the one that took John and the one that took Jade. Rose no longer took them lightly as just another inconvenience. Her breath quickened when she stepped into the room, arm shaking as they tried to get a clear view of her vein. She couldn’t look, not at the needle, not at the blood that once fascinated her, and especially not at the machine that had condemned her friend to what she knew was a short and hellish life. 

And when the third time happened, and the light blinked green once again Rose exited into the hallway. She heard whispers that it had happened again, that someone was taken. Her pace had quickened, changing from a fast walk to a sprint, her eyes darting across the sea of unfamiliar faces until she ran headlong into Dave’s chest. The collision knocked them both backwards, Rose locked eyes with his strange red ones, which were wide with worry.

“I thought it was you,” He said. Rose shook her head, unable to say anything else. The school had learned to not keep what had happened a secret. They announced it over the P.A. system ten minutes later and Rose ran. 

The lockers bordering the edge of the hall turned into a blur as she ran, bursting out of one of the side doors of the school to drop to the ground. She fell forward on her knees, face pressed down into her hands. There was a hand on her shoulder, and then arms encircling her and then Rose and Dave sat pressed against the side of the school, smudged in dirt and facing the dumpster for a long while. It wasn’t like with John, where they all had tried to avoid showing a visible reaction for the longest time possible. Rose sobbed into Dave’s chest, because there was nothing else to do. He said nothing, but held her tighter. 

“Oh, excuse me,” Someone said, and Rose was snapped back into the present, moving slightly to the right so that someone could pass her by. She reached her class and flopped down in her desk. Reminiscing on painful memories was a particularly shitty way to start the day. 

“All right, let’s get started,” the teacher was saying. Rose tapped the edge of her pencil on the desk, not really paying attention. 

“Now before we begin today’s lesson there’s good news that has actually just been announced a few minutes ago regarding the disease that has been hitting our country as of late.” Rose’s head snapped up. 

“They announced just this morning that an immunization has been developed, tested and is now ready for public use.” The entire class gasped. They had been trying to develop a working immunization for the better part of twenty years. 

“The school will be responsible for the immunization of all of you, so it’s imperative that no one misses school next week. Eighth graders will be immunized on tuesday with the freshman. 

“What’s going to happen to the rest of them?” Rose found herself asking. The entire class turned around in their seats. 

“You know, the ones already in Haven.” 

The teacher gave her a stern look. Rose’s heart was pounding, Haven was a taboo subject nowadays, with nearly everyone knowing the horrific living conditions but no one doing anything about it. The fact that there was hardly any research for a cure to the disease was an indicator that the government, almost like a small child, preferred to shove a problem out of sight rather than deal with it. 

“I urge you to take that up with our local representative,” The teacher said stiffly. “I believe they are already debating what to do with those left in the cities.” 

The teacher turned back to the class and started talking about the lesson plans for the day. Rose stared down back at her desk, trying to ignore the whispers that floated in her direction. 

“Yeah that’s her….her friends were the ones taken….” 

“...oh no way! Do you think she’s infected too?” 

“...she can’t talk about it like that….” 

The rest of the class passed quickly, and afterwards Rose walked at a brisk pace down the hallway to find Dave standing next to her locker. 

“You heard?” She asked. 

“Yeah. We should leave. I want to see what’s actually going on.” Rose nodded and grabbed her backpack out of the locker. The walked swiftly down the hallway, out the double doors and skirted quickly out of view, heading down the street on the way to Dave’s apartment just as the bell for second period rang.


	27. Resolution

Dave’s sneakers hit the pavement in an identical rhythm to Rose’s as they walked along at a brisk pace. It was silent save the far-off hum of cars on the freeway or the occasional birdsong. Looking around, Rose observed that it didn’t really seem like a crisis was happening. It was so easy to just look at the blue sky, and the buildings with their shiny glass windows and forget that anything bad was happening to anyone. The fact that a cure had been created after all these years marked the end of a panic which seemed to leave no visible traces. 

If you looked closer, Rose noticed, you could see it. It was in the empty desks at school, and the numerous For Sale signs in homes. It was in the faces of many of the people, putting on a faulty mask, attempting to go along with what everyone else was doing but you could see right through it. She could see it in Dave and she could see it in herself, sometimes, when she dared to look close enough. 

They passed out of the school area into downtown, the buildings becoming slightly larger, streets filling with people. It was fairly obvious the two of them were skipping school,   
no way they could pass for college kids yet, but no one really seemed to care. 

“Is your brother home?” Rose asked after several minutes. Dave shrugged, staring ahead. 

“Probably not.” 

She exhaled, turning her gaze from his face. He was so apathetic nowadays, it was almost unbearable. They turned down his street without thought, Rose seemed to spend more time here than her own home. His building was nearly identical to the ones surrounding it, they entered and immediately made for the elevator, miraculously working. The countless times it had broken down and they were forced to climb thirty odd sets of stairs were not among the happiest of Rose’s memories. 

They reached his door, Dave fishing the key out of his pocket and they entered, throwing their bags by the door. Dave’s room of organized chaos was familiar to Rose’s not unlike her own, but the colors here were much louder. 

“Okay,” Dave said, flopping down on the futon and grabbing the TV remote, “Let’s see what this shitstorm’s about." 

“And now,” The reporter said “We tune back into the live debate currently happening in D.C. For those just joining us now, release of an effective immunization now sparks the question: What should we do with the disease victims currently residing in quarantined cities? Project Haven, which was launched in 1978 currently extends to more than 100 abandoned cities around the U.S., with an estimated 10 million citizens still affected. Marina Peixes, former Head of CDC and powerhouse behind Project Haven has been unavailable for comment about the current debate.” Dave made an irritated noise in his throat. 

“She’s the reason that they’re there. Even if they’re just kids.” 

Rose slipped her shoes off and joined Dave on the couch, curling her feet up beneath her and leaning against his chest. The camera on screen panned to show the whole debate room and the audio tuned in. They watched the debate for over an hour, making a few comments or noises of disgust. The main points Rose could gather was that they were planning on doing one of two things: Cutting off all supplies and leaving the remaining people to wither away, or going in and wiping them all out. The debate on whether disease victims were human or not seemed obsolete, they clearly weren’t regarded as such. 

Not once were they mentioned as “people” or the fact that 80% of those affected are under 18 was spoken aloud. 

“This is sick.” Rose finally said, “This is terrible, I can’t watch this.” Dave’s mouth was a thin line as he switched it off. 

“They’re going to kill them. Either starve them to death or shoot outright.” 

“How can they do this?” 

The words hung pointedly in the empty air. Neither of them had an answer. 

And a week later, Rose’s last chance to see John or Jade again went slithering into her bloodstream in the form of a clear liquid. The nurse hummed happily as she let Rose out the doorway, everyone seemed to be smiling. It was a cause of celebration, she knew that, but the debate about what to do with the others was still going strong. There had been a huge push for instantanious genoicide. They didn’t call it that though, they referred to it instead as “extermination”.   
Rose took the picture of all four of them that had been taped to the inside of her locker down, shoved it under a science textbook. It was too hard looking at them now, knowing that they might be just days from being dead. 

The days passed quickly. Snapchats of black coffee whizzed between two phones. Rose spent most of her time out of the house, she would get home and John’s dad would be glued to the TV, watching politicians debate whether they were going to kill his kid or not. She couldn’t be in that kind of enviroment, not with her mom trying not to cry as she sat on the sofa, not with trying to hold back silent tears herself. 

Dave and her began leaving reguarly during lunch or break, several times she just walked to his house with her backpack in the morning, not even bothering to sit through the first period. They would sit on his roof, side by side and sometimes he would even talk. 

“I wonder what she’s doing right now,” he would say, and Rose would try to imagine Jade painted grey, running through a dark alleyway filled with shady characters. She was sure that they were still alive, there was no doubt in her mind. She knew that John had survived and Jade had found him. They were together, and it would be fine. 

They debated for three weeks before the resolution. It was seven pm, Rose lay on her bed staring at the ceiling when her phone started to ring. She picked it up and held it to her ear. 

“Yeah?” She asked, not bothering to think up a proper greeting. 

“Five years.” Dave’s voice answered. 

“What?” 

“They just announced it. They’re giving them five years and then they’re going in. They won’t have supplies or anything they figure it’s about enough time for the rest of them to” --he gulped-- “be gone by the time they come in with weapons.” 

Rose sat with the phone up to her ear for over a minute in silence, Dave’s breathing on the other side faintly heard. 

“We’d be seniors,” She said quietly after a while. 

“Yeah, we’re graduating high school just as John and Jade are actively being killed.” 

“Dave…” 

“Sorry.” 

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“Rose that was a shit thing to say I’m--” Rose hung up. The phone slide from her hands and dropped behind the bed. She curled over on her side and closed her eyes. 

Two hours later, after having the strangest dream involving girls with red eyes and sharp objects, and two people that seemed very familiar, she woke with a start.


	28. Escape

Kanaya stood up quickly, hoisting Karkat to his feet. 

“We have to get out of here. Quickly. John, can you--?” She gestured to Terezi, still unmoving. John turned back to her, out of the corner he saw Jade grab Sollux’s hand and start out the door. 

“Hey, Terezi? We have to get out of here, Kanaya said--” 

“I don’t care.” Her words were quiet, yet forceful. 

“No, come on, we have to get out of here!” Just then a huge boom echoed throughout the city. The building shook. 

“That’s the drop!” Kanaya snapped, “We have to move, we’ll be swarmed in minutes.” 

John tugged on Terezi’s arm, but her body was limp and heavy. Kanaya made an irritated noise. 

“Snap out of it!” She yelled, quickly dropping Karkat, and running over to Terezi. Karkat wobbled for a moment before John caught him, slinging his arm over his own shoulders. Karkat leaned against him heavily. 

Kanaya pulled Terezi to her feet by the front of her shirt. 

“You know what happens when there’s a drop! Use your fucking brain we’re not leaving you here!” She shook Terezi, whose head lolled in response. Kanaya let go of her shirt with one hand and slapped Terezi’s cheek with a resounding crack. 

“I know you’ve lived through much worse than this, you’re the strongest person I know! We need you now, with your wits about you! You can do whatever you want after this, but we need to get out of here first.” 

Terezi’s jaw clenched as she straightened up almost mechanically. She pushed past Kanaya and followed Jade and Sollux out the door. Kanaya glared after her but said nothing, picking up her chainsaw from where she had stowed it behind the door. 

“Why do we have to leave?” John asked, half-dragging Karkat into the hallway. 

“What you just heard was a supply drop. Food, blankets, clothes, everything to last about two years. Or for how long we can make it last now. The drop point isn’t more than a mile from here, which is highly dangerous. Everyone’s swarming, trying to get the best supplies first. There’s people in here starving, people so desperate that they won’t hesitate to kill for a scrap of bread. It’s a bloodbath, and we need to get back to the East side of the city.” 

They started down the stairs, watching Terezi’s back disappear around the first landing. Karkat was stumbling but managed to keep upright due to a tight grip on John’s elbow. They could hear movement down below, hundreds of feet pounding past, muffled voices. Kanaya was breathing fast, but remained composed. The stairs took significantly less time on the way down, and then they were back in the lobby with the cracked fountain and the dusty relics. 

Jade and Sollux were standing nervously in the corner of the room, waiting. Terezi stood a few feet apart from them. Her expression hadn’t changed. Jade locked eyes with John, her expression grim. Outside the doors, herds of people ran past, a flow of grey with patches of yellow. There were noises, shouts and screams and footsteps surrounding them. Jade’s glasses were smudged and slightly off-kilter, her sweatshirt too big and hair tangled. 

She had only been here two days, John thought with a lurch. His first two days had been spent crying and running off to hide on top of buildings, he could barely look at Karkat without freaking out, but here she was, in the midst of all this crazy shit she didn’t know anything about, completely keeping her cool. 

“John, do you still have that knife I gave you?” Kanaya asked, staring warily at the crowd outside the door. John nodded, pulling it out of his jacket uneasily. 

“Keep that out. If someone runs at you, use it. Don’t think, just strike first.” John swallowed. He didn’t know if he was even capable of stabbing someone. He held the knife in his right hand, steadying Karkat in his left, and walked behind Terezi and Kanaya towards the door. 

They burst outside, and were immediately buffeted left and right as the crowd surged past them. They moved to the right, trying to stay out of the way of the moving people.   
There was shouts surrounding them, John felt walled in, trapped. He was the furthest left, being hit by shoulders every few seconds. They moved as quickly as John could drag Karkat along. 

They heard yells from behind them, the only thing John focused on was his frantic breathing. He was staring at the blur of grey rushing past him, hoping that no one would notice, that no one would care----A figure burst from the crowd and erupted in front of them, a man about six feet tall with huge, spiraled horns and maniac eyes sprung forward at Terezi. 

She froze, blade hanging loosely at her side, her face tensed but her body made no movement. Everything sped up and slowed down at the same time, Kanaya grabbing Terezi’s limp wrist and pushing it upward, shoving the blade through the man’s throat. 

Deep purple blood splattered out of the wound, falling onto Terezi’s hair and glasses and John gagged, almost dropping Karkat. Jade screamed, a far off echo. The man crumpled to the ground, twitching and gasping but there was no time and Kanaya was yanking him forward, he stepped over the body, pretending it was just an inanimate obstruction and raced blindly forward. 

His breath caught in his throat, arm ached with the weight of Karkat leaning heavily on him and gasping. The bandage tied around his shoulder was a deep scarlet, something that stuck John as odd, to see an ordinary blood color here. 

They fought their way down half a block more of insanity, the next time someone lunged out of the crowd it was at John, and he thrust his left hand out without looking, only hearing the strangled groan and feeling the slippery liquid between his fingers. He dropped the hilt of the knife where it lay buried and dragged Karkat forward again, not looking at his fingers until several minutes later. 

They reached an alleyway, and took a hasty exit. There were people in here too, but far fewer, and each with a more prominent goal then lunging at the group passing them by. John had been crying for the past several minutes without noticing. Kanaya’s face was splattered with blood, a gruesome rainbow engulfing her delicate features. 

The trickle of people slowed each time they turned into a new alleyway. The pace of the group grew slower and slower. 

“Where are we going?” Sollux asked at last. 

“Home.” Kanaya said. “Your home at least. I can’t have six people living in my one room.” 

They were going to the Bunker. John’s chest expanded at the thought, he hadn’t spent much time in the Bunker, but enough to regard it as a home of some sorts. And he wouldn’t have to sleep on the floor. That would be a contrast to the last few months. 

“We’re going to the Bunker,” he explained to Jade. 

“Was that where we climbed up?” She answered, her voice a little shaky. 

“Yeah.” 

The rest of the noise that accompanied them the rest of the day was breathing. They walked for hours, feet thudding in a heavy rhythm. When the sky began to hint at morning, Kanaya gestured to an empty shop. They slept in a pile once again, except this time there was no squabbling or friendly bickering, no nudges or pokes or whispered giggles. The silence sat heavy on all their chests, pressing even the thought of speaking from them. 

John slept fitfully, waking several times to the brightness of the world outside the window. He thought he heard far-off screams, but perhaps it was just his imagination.


	29. Sn0wman

“Thank fucking god,” Karkat said feebly as the storefront that housed the Bunker came into view at last. 

John exhaled in relief. The better part of the night had been spent lugging Karkat through various sketchy streets, having to deal with Terezi’s unresponsiveness, Kanaya’s stony silence and his own aching limbs. 

Terezi tugged the trapdoor up with more force than was necessary, expelling clouds of dust into the air. She jumped down and took off down the corridor. John jumped next, landing on the dirt floor, then looking up to help Karkat stumble down the ladder. 

The door to the Bunker was open, John couldn’t remember if they’d left it that way or someone had come in, but either way he was far too tired to care. They entered, the lights flickering dimly from the ceiling, everything was pretty much how they’d left it. The two couches sat perpendicular in the center of the room, the coffee table with the battered TV between them. And there were beds! So many beds, more than enough for the entire company of people. 

“We need to get that out…” Kanaya said, gesturing to the knife still firmly implanted in Karkat’s chest. 

“Do it in the bathroom,” Sollux interjected. “I don’t want blood all over the floor the first day back.” 

Kanaya grabbed Karkat by the upper arm, dragging him into the bathroom. 

“Okay well I don’t know about you guys but I’m going to bed,” Sollux said, then stood still. John, picking up his cue, walked over and led Sollux to the upper right bunk bed in the wall. 

“You can take that one,” He said to Jade, indicating the bunk below Sollux. Jade nodded, slipping her sneakers and glasses off, then crawled beneath the faded brown blanket. 

“There’s a couple of beds in the other room, or you can sleep on the couch or whatever,” John said to Terezi, still standing silently at the doorway. She walked slowly onto one couch, sitting down. Muffled groans came from the bathroom. 

John pushed off his sneakers and sweatshirt. His left hand was still stained from another troll’s blood, but he was too exhausted to care. He slid under the red blanket, taking his glasses off. Terezi was slumped down on the couch, the only things visible were the tips of her sharp horns. They were vibrant and strangely in focus… 

John looked down at the glasses in his hands, then back up at the room. He held his glasses up to his eyes, then away from them. There was no difference in his vision. He looked down at them, a strange sensation forming in his stomach. He let them drop from his gray fingers onto the floor with a clatter. In the blank reflection of the TV he saw himself, just another pair of yellow eyes floating among the darkness. 

He didn’t sleep, just lay facing the wall for quite some time, calmly. He heard Karkat and Kanaya softly bickering, then after a while they quieted down too. There was no noise despite the soft electric hum of the lights, and the light breathing of Sollux and Jade. Then, soft footsteps. They neared closer to him, the back of John’s neck beginning to prickle alarmingly. He willed himself to stay still and silent. 

“Hey,” Terezi said, barely making any noise at all. John flipped around, sitting up. Terezi had abandoned her full costume for just a raggedy tank top and pants. she wasn’t wearing her glasses, the scars covering the top half of her face fully visible. 

“Hi.” John said. Those had been the first words she had spoken in two days. 

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I kind of shut myself down.” 

“It’s alright,” John said. You did kill your sister after all, he didn’t say. 

“You smell more yellow,” She said, almost smiling. John still didn’t understand why she said she could smell colors. 

“I think my eyes are glowing.” 

“You should get that checked out.” 

It was a strange, quiet banter that passed between them, spoken barely above a whisper. And then, as if they belonged to the same mind, John scooted back and Terezi came forward, climbing into the opening in the wall and under the covers. She sighed very deeply, and John fit himself where her arm connected to her shoulder and they breathed very slowly as one. 

Neither of them did anything more, just lay pressed together, watching the rise and fall of their chests and listening to the static hum of the night. 

John fell asleep at some point, laying on Terezi was like an ocean going up and down and up and down until nothing persisted except the unyielding rhythm. It was dark, and warm and safe and for once, not alone. It was all right, for a little bit. 

John’s eyes bolted open as Terezi was suddenly yanked out from beside him. He sat up quickly, crashing his head against the top of the bunk. Someone was in the Bunker, Terezi was yanked up from the floor and shoved against the wall. He smelled acrid smoke, stumbling out to see none other than Snowman pinning Terezi to the wall by her throat. Terezi hadn’t made a sound, not even when yanked from sleep. 

“H-hey!” John yelled. Snowman, towering over him in a black trenchcoat and heeled boots, ignored him completely. 

“You backstabbing little bitch,” She said softly to Terezi. “Thought you could get away with that, huh? Thought we would be too dumb to notice?” Snowman leaned in, face to face with Terezi, lips annunciating clearly every syllable. Terezi, face stormy, spat in her face, a glob of teal salive landing clearly on Snowman’s jaw. The woman leaned back,  
punching Terezi in the face. She stumbled to the right, and Snowman caught her again on the other side. Neither Terezi nor Snowman betrayed any emotion. She struck again, and John yelled. Kanaya came running into the room, followed by a limping Karkat. Snowman delivered another blow, holding Terezi up as she slid down the wall, then another, and another until Terezi’s eyes flickered. Snowman loosened her grip, letting Terezi crumble. Her nose and cheek were both gushing blood, dripping down the front of her shirt.  
Snowman knelt, one foot planted into Terezi’s chest. 

“Now you listen to me, Redglare.” Terezi gasped. “I am under orders not to kill you, since some in this wonderful city of ours care to actually keep to their word. But the conditions are as followed: you will in no way make yourself known under your former pseudonym Redglare. You will not kill anyone else, guilty or otherwise. If you do any of these things, or step over the line to the West side of the city, I will personally slit your throat.” 

She paused, spat in Terezi’s face, then stood up and turned towards the door, sparing a glance at everyone else, standing in stunned silence. She gave a simpering smile, then walked towards the door, lighting a cigarette on the way out. 

“I hope you all die peacefully,” She said and then, as quick as she came, Snowman was gone. 

Terezi was breathing very quickly, blood still flowing freely from her nose into her open mouth. John knelt down next to her, unsure of what to do. She batted his helping hand away, clawing herself to a sitting position against the wall. Her head moved into her hands and Terezi Pyrope, even with scorched tear ducts, began to cry.  
John sat on one side of her, Karkat the other, Jade, Sollux and Kanaya around them. There were still a few hours until the last of daylight vanished, and they spent those together, in perfect silence.


	30. Time Skip

The rest of July passed quickly. The piles of clothes and miscellaneous junk was collected from below the candy shop and brought to The Bunker in droves, carried mostly by John, Jade and Kanaya. Terezi ditched her teal and red ensemble, swapping it for wearing John and Karkat’s t-shirts. Karkat remarked that they really needed to find a clothing store that someone hadn’t raided yet, because there were several people who had to continually go shirtless on laundry day. 

“I mean, I’m not really complaining” Karkat said, hanging upside down off the couch, “It’s hot as fuck in here and the suns out for at least a few more hours, but we really need a wider variety of clothes”. 

“Yeah, tell me about it,” Terezi said, walking over wearing nothing but cutoff jeans and a sports bra. “I didn’t know it could get humid underground.” 

“Wait, I thought it was your shirt day,” Karkat said, confused. 

“Eh, it’s hot in here. Do you want my shirt? You can have it…” She tossed a black heap of fabric at Karkat’s face, who swiped it away. 

“Ew gross, it’s probably all sweaty and shit”. 

“Yeah it is,” Kanaya interjected, coming in from the side room, looking her usual elegant self except without pants. “And that’s why you need to give it to me, I’m doing   
laundry.” 

“You, umm, missing something?” Karkat asked, grinning. 

“I’m gay, Jade’s not and Terezi’s blind,” Kanaya answered curtly. 

“Daaaaamn,” Sollux yelled, poking his head out of the side room. Kanaya rolled her eyes. 

Just then Jade came through the door in a white shirt and shorts, but wearing a scrap of fabric around her right forearm. 

“It’s really nice up there,” she sighed, unwrapping the fabric to reveal her first gray patches of skin. “I found some food scraps at the sight of the drop...not much but better than nothing I guess?” She shrugged a dirty blue backpack off her shoulder and opened it, removing the array of cans and plastic bags of food, placing them in the cupboard over the oven. “The place is pretty cleared out though...if it was the last drop then we’re gonna have to rely on something else to get food.” John walked over to help her, a pit growing in his stomach, which he tried hard to suppress. They were fine now, it was all fine. 

August 

“Okay, now take your left hand, and raise it directly above you.” 

“I don’t like this Egbert.” 

“It’s fine, only a few more feet, trust me it’s gonna be awesome.” 

Sollux swore under his breath as he reached up and grabbed the ledge above him. 

“Okay, now move your left foot up.” 

“I didn’t like this shit when I could see.” 

“C’mon it’s so dark right now I can barely see anything either.” 

“Bullshit.” 

John laughed, swinging down a few feet to Sollux’s level on the outside of the building. He had scaled this building enough that he was comfortable enough to hold on with just one hand. Besides, the wind was pushing them towards the building. 

“We’re really close, I swear.” 

“If I wasn’t dying already Egbert, there’d be no way you would have ever convinced me…” Sollux trailed off. 

John laughed and looked up again, to see the stars clearly shining in the cloudless night. 

After ten more tedious moments Sollux collapsed over the edge of the roof. 

“I knew you could do it!” John said, pulling him to his feet. “Now just one quick ascent more…” John grabbed Sollux’s arm and ran with him to the middle of the room, Sollux grumbling audibly. There stood an elevated box, where the door to go down in the building was , but there were also stairs around the side, which he took two at a time. They now stood on top of the box, elevated another ten feet above the roof of the building. The warm wind whipped through John’s hair, he looked over the vast landscape of ruined buildings and dark alleyways, then beyond them to the calm flat of the desert. 

Sollux was grinning, wider than John had seen him of late. 

“We’re on the top of the world aren’t we?” He said, and John knew that he could feel it too, the exhilaration of being up so high, of being above everything. 

"Yeah," John replied, laughing slightly. "Top of the world." 

He reached unconsciously to the top of his head, brushing his fingers against the two small nubs that had so recently appeared. The headaches were nothing compared to the alarm that swept through his stomach every time he felt them, a tiny little voice saying "you're closer to dying now". But he couldn't worry about that yet. 

September 

 

“Are you ready?” Karkat’s voice drifted through the mostly-empty Bunker. 

“I’m taking a shower!” John yelled back. 

“Well hurry up then! I’m hungry!” 

John sighed, shutting off the flow of cold, slightly dirty water and grabbing one of three graying towels laying nearby. He toweled his hair off, wincing gingerly as the fabric came in contact with his budding orange horns. The bathroom floor was, as usual, covered in various clothes. He pulled on his pair of underwear, that was pretty much the only thing they didn’t share, then cargo shorts and a white shirt covered in large pink flowers. Looking down at his patterned chest, he considered changing shirts, but then again it was fairly dark outside. 

“We’re dying here” Karkat yelled from the door, a recent saying that they’d all been using. Nothing like a terminal illness. 

Karkat looked at John’s shirt choice, seemed to struggle with himself for a moment, but didn’t say anything. He, after all, had worn that shirt the previous week, much to the amusement of Kanaya and John. 

They left, shutting the door on the empty house behind them. They exited the old clothing store and ran into Kanaya, her arms full of bags and eyes hopeful. 

“We found something--Terezi and I, it must’ve been a storage place of someone who died, and there’s quite a bit of food there.” 

John whooped and followed Kanaya, all three of them tearing off down the dark street. He was now used to having as good vision at night as he used to in the daylight, thanks to the yellow eyes. Every detail of the cracked buildings and pavement were illuminated. His stomach grumbled, but no matter, they were almost there. 

October 

 

“Trick or treat!” 

“What the fuck.” 

 

Sollux stood in the doorway of the Bunker, staring just above Jade’s head with a bemused expression. 

“Trick or treat...halloween, remember?” She said, laughing. Her face was mostly grey, though spots of her original skin color were speckled here and there. Her arms and legs were similarly splotched with grey. She clutched a plastic bag in her hand, holding it up. 

“Well yeah but I don’t have anything for you?” Sollux said. 

“But I have something for you! I guess this is more like reverse trick or treating,” she said, reaching into her bag and pressing two brightly wrapped objects into Sollux’s hand. 

“No way, is this what I think it is?” 

“Yup!” She said happily. “Me and Karkat found that stuff he traded for a couple months ago….when I first got here. We forgot about it, but I figure it’s around Halloween, right?” 

“I haven’t had halloween since I was ten,” Sollux chuckled, unwrapping the first piece. 

“Hey losers,” Jade greeted John and Terezi, sprawled on the couches. “Do you guys want some candy?” 

“I don’t even remember the last time I had some,” Terezi said longingly. Jade tossed her two pieces, which promptly bounced off the side of her head and into her lap. 

“So what’s your costume?” John asked as Jade settled next to him. 

“I dunno...an alien I guess? We kind of look like them already.” 

“Oh my god. How did I not realize this.” 

“Like if a baby saw us it would totally think we were aliens!” 

 

November 

“I think we’re going to need to start rationing food.” 

December 

“I think my eyes turned.” 

“Whoa weird.” 

“They did? Does it look bad?” 

“No, just different. Weird.” 

“What if they could see us now?” 

“Hm?” 

“Dave and Rose. What would they do?” 

“Probably run. The opposite direction, and fast.” 

“Merry Christmas.” 

“Fuck Christmas.” 

January 

 

“Jade?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I think something’s wrong with Karkat.”


	31. Karkat

Jade exhaled slowly. “I know. He’s been hiding something...I just didn’t really want to acknowledge it I guess.” 

John clenched his teeth. This was the opposite reaction he’d been hoping for. A simple “Really?” would have sufficed, or anything other than a confirmation of his suspicions. 

“What are we going to do about it then?” 

“Nothing I guess. When he wants to tell us he will. There’s nothing we can really do about it.” 

“It doesn’t make sense! He says he’s only been here for about three years. That’s way less time than Sollux said before you start dying.” 

“He said it depends on blood color. About that, have you checked what yours is yet?” She posed it as a simple question, but it was far from it. John hesitated. 

“I can’t. Not yet...I don’t even know if I want to know.” John looked down uneasily at his forearm. He hadn’t spilled any blood in a long time, it remained a mystery what color coursed inside his veins, one that hid his destiny. He couldn’t stand knowing, knowing he was going to die first, or outlive the rest of them. 

“Hey John, were we gonna go?” Karkat’s voice called from behind them, both John and Jade jumped. 

“Yeah, of course.” John stuttered, jumping to his feet and trying not to look guilty. 

“Okay cool. Meet you outside.” Karkat exited. He was wearing dark jeans and a striped sweatshirt, he looked normal. Maybe John was just imagining things. But no, Jade had noticed something too. With a sick feeling in his stomach, John pulled on his sneakers and followed Karkat out the door. 

The night was windy, John’s hair was whipped back as they started jogging at a light pace out of the neighborhood. It was a nightly routine for the two of them, trying to find any supplies they could since people had become very possessive of supplies, rarely trading. 

“Kanaya was telling me about a group of people that live about half hour from here. All jade-bloods who had been here awhile, so they’re probably gone now.” 

“Okay, you lead.” 

John concentrated on Karkat’s figure in front of him. At first John hadn’t been able to run far at all, getting easily winded and embarrassingly slow compared to the others. Now, however he had to consciously slow down to keep behind Karkat, barely out of breath after fifteen minutes. At first he thought that maybe he was just getting better, but it was more than that. He remembered the first night he met Karkat, how swiftly and quietly he had moved, dragging a gasping John in his wake. He was definitely getting slower, his breathing more apparent. When John tried to drop hints about taking breaks Karkat generally just glared at him. 

And then it happened. One moment they were moving, the next Karkat was sprawled forward on the ground. 

“Whoa, are you okay?” John skidded to a stop and fell on his knees. Karkat was visibly trying to cover up how hard he was breathing. He nodded. 

“Fine...just tripped.” John stood up, pulling Karkat to his feet. Was is his imagination or what Karkat...lighter than before? He’d always been small, John now had about six inches on him, but he felt too light. Karkat set off again, even slower this time and John, forehead creased in worry, followed. 

They kept on about five more minutes while John tried to think of excuses that would allow them to return without Karkat getting pissed. John being tired wouldn’t do it, they usually completed longer loops than this one. He could say he forgot something, but what is there to forget? None of them really owned anything. Maybe-- 

“Augh!” 

John skidded to a stop once again. Karkat was on his hands and knees, bent over after falling yet again. His chest was heaving, and he looked alarmed. 

“Dude, what’s going on? Are you okay?” This time Karkat shook his head. John’s stomach sank as he sat down on the jagged pavement. Karkat took a minute to regain his breath, finally sitting up but refusing to meet John’s eyes. 

“I’m an idiot. I thought...I thought I would have more time.” 

“What do you mean?” John already knew the answer, but he had to ask. 

Karkat took a deep breath, pulling something from his sweatshirt. He flicked it open, revealing a small blade which he quickly sliced the top of his forearm. Candy red blood spilled streamed out of the cut and dripped onto the ground before he spoke. 

“It never changed. It’s supposed to--it’s a sign of your body trying to fight off the infection. I guess---I guess some people just don’t have a defense. It’s really rare…” He trailed off. 

“Can you--?” John began to ask, then cut off. “Let’s go back okay? I’ll ask Jade or someone to check out the houses.” 

Karkat stared down at his bleeding arm for a moment before nodding, slowly clambering to his feet. 

They walked the entire way back, it took about half an hour and neither of them spoke a word. John kept glancing sideways, trying not to seem too concerned that Karkat might suddenly collapse, but he maintained a steady pace, blankly staring ahead. They ducked into the clothes store and down the trapdoor. 

“Back already?” Jade asked as they walked through the door. “Did you find anything?” 

“No,” Karkat said curtly, exiting to the second room. John remained hovering by the doorway for another second before collapsing next to Jade on the couch. 

“What?” 

“I was right. He’s dying.” 

“Did he tell you?” 

“He couldn’t even make it to the houses. Fell over twice. And yeah, I guess his blood never even changed colors.” 

“Fuck,” Jade exhaled, almost silently. They sat for a moment. 

“Where’s the others?” John asked. 

“In that old mall on 31st street.” 

“I should tell them...I guess.” 

Jade nodded as John got up and exited the Bunker again. Running at his own pace John made it to the mall in ten minutes. It was three stories, and mostly looted except for a few storage rooms that Terezi had opened with a combination of lockpicking and kicking. He pushed open the dusty once-automatic doors and bolted up the stopped escalator. He found Terezi easily enough, she was behind the first door to the right, surrounded by open shoeboxes. 

“Oh hey John!” She said as he entered. “If you see anything your size take it, we’re running low on shoes without holes. Most of the good ones are gone but if you have big enough feet maybe you’ll get lucky.” 

“I just wanted to talk to you for a sec.” 

“Okay. Shoot.” 

“It’s just that Karkat’s…” 

“Dying? I know.” She paused in frantically unboxing shoes. “I may be blind, but I’m not stupid.” 

“But you didn’t say anything!” 

“Of course not. It’s not what you do...he’ll act normally until he can’t anymore, and then we’ll take care of him, and then he’ll be gone. That’s how it goes.” Her tone remained light, but her body had stiffened. 

“But Sollux and Kanaya--” 

“They know too. Look, we’ve been around here a lot longer, we can see the signs, so to speak.” 

“It just doesn’t feel right.” 

“Nothing does, when you think about it.” She turned back to the boxes. “Look, if you really want, all of us can go back now.” 

“No, we can’t afford to.” 

“Yes we can, it’s okay.” She got up, shoving several shoeboxes into John’s arms, then stepped out of the room. 

“HEY!” She yelled, her voice echoing in the grimy space. “WE’RE HEADING OUT!”. Sollux and Kanaya backed out of a room a floor above them, each holding a pile of various clothes. 

“We’re gonna have to was these a shit ton, but we have more clothes!” Sollux said, carefully stepping down the escalator. They all sounded so casual, John thought, but Terezi said that they knew. 

The rest of the night was uneventful. Everyone sorted through the new clothes, then began the arduous process of trying to get the dirt and smell out of them. Karkat still didn’t directly acknowledge John, but otherwise behaved normally. John felt as though tape had been stretched over his mouth, he couldn’t talk, couldn’t laugh, not while the disturbing thought of his friend dying was so close at hand. 

He crawled into his bed that night, pretending not to notice that Karkat and Sollux had switched bunks. It’s so Karkat won’t fall when trying to climb in the top one, his brain concluded, the answer to a question John was trying not to ask. He shoved his pillow over his head, trying to block out any more stupid thoughts before he drifted off to sleep. 

Three average days later John woke up to Karkat softly walking by his bed. He opened his eyes to the door swinging as he left. John pondered going after him, but barely a minute had passed before Karkat slunk back inside and sat on the couch, dropping his head into his hands. John closed his eyes again, turning away from the center of the room. 

“Hey get up. Breakfast.” Sollux jabbed John’s shoulder, who rolled out of bed, having been awake for a while already. Kanaya was passing out granola bars, which he saw Karkat refusing. 

“We’re gonna go check out those old jadeblood houses,” Sollux said. “Kk, you feel up for it?” 

“I can’t,” Karkat answered a little too quickly. He hadn’t moved since John had seen him get up. 

“Okay,” Sollux said before shoving his granola bar in his mouth. Jade grabbed his arm and led him toward the door, looking back at John as if asking him if he wanted to come. John shook his head and she nodded and left, Kanaya gently touch Karkat’s shoulder before following in their wake. 

John rolled out of bed and made a beeline for the shower, taking as long as he possibly could. Toweling his hair off after, he paused in the doorway, overhearing Terezi’s frantic tone. 

“You couldn’t get up the ladder?” 

“...no.” 

“It’s too early! You should’t be that far yet. It’s almost like everything’s…”

“Going to fast? Almost like my blood didn’t change color at all.” 

Terezi put an arm around Karkat’s shoulders then paused. 

“Jesus Chirst Karkat when was the last time you ate?” 

“What do you mean.” 

“I mean you’re a fucking skeleton. When was the last time?” 

“I--I can’t. It tastes wrong and then I just puke it up five minutes later.” 

“How long?” 

“A week. Maybe more. I just can’t!” His voice broke, and Terezi pulled him closer into her. John sat in the doorway, trying hard not to listen to the broken sobs echoing throughout the room. Half an hour later Terezi tripped over him walking into the room. 

“Sorry!” He said, jumping up. She didn’t respond. He was alarmingly reminded of the several days after she killed Vriska where she refused to betray any hint of emotion. However, that quickly passed after she flung herself at him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. John hugged her back, a little surprised. 

“This is bullshit,” She said, her voice muffled in John’s shoulder. “He’ll be dead within two weeks.”


	32. All Was Still

As each day passed, John noticed a more visible change in Karkat. Three days later, the shadows always present under his eyes had darkened to a racoon-like level. Whatever food the rest of them convinced him to eat was having little effect, he was getting smaller day by day. The size of his eyes seemed to be growing, but that was due mostly to the shrinking of his face. It was a little terrifying to John the rate which Karkat’s body was deteriorating. 

It was on the fourth day, while John was scrubbing clothes in the shower, a crash echoed through the small space. He jumped, dropped the wet shirt, and rushed into the   
main room where he saw Karkat crumpled, having fallen and knocking over the coffee table. 

“What happened?” He asked. Karkat shook his head. 

“Just tripped.” 

“Okay,” John said warily. He pulled Karkat to his feet easily. Karkat took a step towards the couch and swooped forward, and would have fallen if it weren’t for John catching his arm. Karkat gritted his teeth and shook his head again. John, without letting go of Karkat’s arm, walked him slowly back to the couch. Karkat fell back and closed his eyes, not saying a word to John. He was visibly shaking, John tossed him a blanket. 

“Call me if you...get up or anything. Okay?” 

Karkat jerked his head so John retreated back into the bathroom. As the others returned that night, he informed them quietly of the new development. All absorbed the news fairly well except for Sollux, who did a quick U-turn and walked back out the bunker. John made to start after him but Kanaya grabbed his shoulder. 

“It’s okay. He knows not to go far.” 

However, when he didn’t reappear two hours later John decided he needed to go out and check. Karkat was asleep, he tended to start sleeping most hours and Terezi, Kanaya and Jade were all home. He wasn’t even as far as the ladder before John started hearing loud crashing noises. Slightly worried about thieves or something, he edged the trapdoor open and peeked out. What met his eyes was a scene of shabby destruction. Rust-covered clothes racks and odd mannequin parts were thrown haphazardly across the floor, most of them in pieces. Sollux stood in the far corner, continuing to chuck across the room anything that came in contact with his hands. 

His mouth was open, face creased in agony. His movements, usually apathetic, were wild and erratic. John climbed quickly out of the trapdoor, ducking a hanger that went flying over his head. Sollux paused, hearing the thump of the trapdoor shutting. 

“Who are you.” 

“Me. John. Are you okay?” 

“No. What do you think? Everything sucks and is full of shit!” On the last word he heaved the bust of a mannequin towards John, who ducked. 

“I just wanted to make sure you didn’t get lost or something,” John said, backing towards the trapdoor. 

“He’s my best friend!” Sollux yelled. “And I can’t fucking do this! Just sitting here and watching him waste away! And knowing that it’s going to happen to all of us and I can’t fucking handle that.” He slowly lowered his arms, dropping the stray piece of metal. “This is just so fucked up. This is so fucking screwed up and I don’t even know what to say.” He was quivering a little now, but his voice was much quieter. 

“I’m not leaving or anything. At least not now. I’ll wait it out, I’ll sit by while he starts puking his guts up and hallucinating and then keels over but I just--I just--” He stopped talking for a moment, chest heaving. 

“Can you just leave me alone? For a little bit?” 

“Yeah, of course.” John said, opening the trapdoor. He paused, wanting to say some words of comfort to the grief-stricken figure of his friend but Sollux had said it all, and there was no words that John could think of that would make it seem any better. 

The atmosphere of the Bunker could not have been more glum. Terezi, after failing to act cheerful was frequently just seen lying on the couch with Karkat, stroking his hair absentmindedly while he slept. Kanaya tried her best to take care of everyone, in charge of the little food they gave out, trying to make things seem better than they were, but John could see the strain was affecting her as well, she rarely smiled and instead performed new tasks with extreme intensity. 

Sollux was true to his word, he didn’t stray more than 50 feet from the Bunker, usually attempting to clear the tension with dumb jokes, which made Karkat chuckle, if no one else. Jade spent most of her time outside. 

“You know I love Karkat like we all do. I just can’t be here I start freaking out. I’m really sorry,” She said in a hushed conversation with John. 

“No I get it, it’s okay.” John said. He too had gone through a phase where he frequently ran away to the tops of buildings to deal with his changing body. Now, however the idea of running off and leaving everyone felt strange. He hadn’t been in Haven a year yet, but it felt like a lifetime. 

Karkat stayed confined to the couch, only getting up occasionally while leaning on John or Kanaya. He started shivering even in the humid underground of the Bunker, to the point where they had to pile blankets on him when the rest of them were in tshirts. About a week from his initial diagnosis Karkat croakily called John. 

“I just feel really fucking weird right now.” He said. “Weirder than usual…” John pulled him up from the couch and started walking towards the bathroom. Karkat clutched at John’s arm, his knuckles poking out from his skeletal hand. He moved slowly and swayed when standing. They had reached the bathroom when Karkat pitched forward, vomiting blood onto the grey floor of the shower. The bright red liquid splattered the drain and both of their shoes. Karkat heaved a few more times before stopping, falling back onto John and breathing hard. 

“Shit,” he whispered, staring down at the mess, his voice breaking. John reached his foot out, turning the faucet handle. Cold water spewed from the showerhead, rinsing the red down the drain. Karkat starting shaking, his body spasming with sobs as he sunk to the ground, John with him. His crying sounded like a wounded animal. John, with nothing to say, simply wrapped his arms around Karkat’s now-frail body. He didn’t know how long they sat, shaking together on the bathroom floor before finally getting up. 

John was crying by the time he led Karkat back to the couch. Kanaya came over to him, softly pulling him into an embrace which made John sob even harder. There was something he had to do, he couldn’t stand not knowing. He pulled away from Kanaya, racing out of the Bunker and into the quiet street. 

He traced the familiar path up the building, running up the stairs and then climbing up the outside few windows. However, to his surprise, when his head cleared the top, he was face to face with Jade. 

“John? What are you doing?” 

“Jade we have to find out. I can’t stand looking at him and not knowing--and not knowing who will be next.” 

She understood immediately, her face set. 

“Okay.” She held her hand out, pulling John over the edge of the roof and then sitting down. John reached into his pocket and pulled out a pocket knife. The tears had dried on his face, his heart was thumping in his ears. All he could see was bright red blood spilling from his veins, or worse from Jade’s. 

She had pulled a nearly identical knife from her own pocket and switched the blade open. 

“We have to look together.” John nodded, locking eyes with her. 

“Okay. Go.” John pushed the blade of the pocket knife to his arm, making a quick slice. He saw a flicker of pain across Jade’s face as she did the same. They stayed staring at each other for a brief moment before looking down. 

Mingled relief and horror flooded through John’s chest as he looked to see cobalt blue liquid sliding across his arm. He turned his head, breath quickening to see Jade staring down at the bright green patch across her own. Even though he knew what it meant, John did a quick list in his head. Red, Brown, Yellow, Green, Teal, Blue. The colors of a fucked up rainbow. And John was at the top. He would outlive them all. 

Jade said something, but he didn’t hear it, all the blood, the cursed blue blood had rushed up into his ears, pounding into his head and he didn’t want to think about it, couldn’t think about the years that stretched ahead of him, ones that would be spent without friends, without food, without anyone. And before he knew it, him and Jade were on their backs, entangled and crying so loudly he was surprised the rest of the city didn’t hear them. 

“When I was little,” Jade said quite a bit later, as they lay looking up at the stars. “I wanted to be an astronaut.” 

“I wanted to be a pilot,” John said. “And this is the closest we’re ever gonna get, up here.” 

There was a moment of silence, in which John and Jade both pictured two dark haired happy children, a boy and a girl, eager to escape into the endless sky. 

 

“Can we just, like, watch a movie or something? All of us?” Karkat asked, late the next night. Usually the suggestion of watching a movie warranted Sollux and Terezi screaming “OPPRESSION” and then arguments about what to watch when they’d left and bickering about the characters, but in this case everyone agreed. 

The movie they put on was fairly stupid, something most of them had probably seen before, but it didn’t really matter. Everyone squished in on one couch, and several blankets were thrown over everyone’s legs. Karkat dozed off twenty minutes in, as predicted, looking tiny in between the lanky figures of Sollux and Terezi. The two of them fell asleep next, as they really had little use for movies. And then next was Kanaya, head slumped on Sollux’s shoulder, and then Jade dozed off in the crook of John’s arm. He idly watched the credits of the movie flick by, an old habit of seeing if he recognized any names. He looked around at the faces of his sleeping family, their features thrown into focus by the light of the screen and felt almost happy before closing his eyes himself. 

He woke up the next morning, face pressed uncomfortably into Terezi’s shoulder, to the sound of Karkat puking up blood yet again. He blinked open his eyes to see Sollux and Terezi slumped over in the spaces that Karkat and Kanaya recently vacated. Everyone else woke up soon later with various limbs asleep. Everyone but John, Karkat and Sollux left to look for more food. John shoved one of the couches to be closer to the bathroom on account of Karkat becoming more and more prone to upchucking blood. 

The second time it happened that day, John had become better at pulling his feet out of the way, he didn’t need another pair of blood splattered shoes. 

“Stop hovering Egbert, you’re not my fucking mother!” Karkat finally snapped at John, after he was lingering around the couch far too long. 

“Sorry,” John said, scooting away.

Just then Sollux came into the room and promptly crashed into the couch John had moved. 

“John what the hell?” 

“Sorry!” He said, grabbing Sollux’s wrist and leading him around it to the other couch. Sollux sat back on it, looking disgruntled. 

“Don’t go moving the furniture without telling the blind guy.” 

“I’m really sorry, I kinda forgot.” 

“You forgot?” 

Just then Karkat starting laughing, a wheezy sort of giggle. 

“What?” Sollux said, perplexed. 

“Just look at us! A couple of fucking invalids. Who would’ve thought.” 

Sollux joined in, and the two of them sat laughing for several minutes, troubles beside them if only for a moment. 

However, the next evening John was awoken by the sounds of panicking. Kanaya was swearing under her breath while boiling water, Jade and Terezi were looking for blankets or any other spare items of clothing. 

“We can’t get him warm,” she quickly explained. “He’s shivering like crazy.” Karkat was nestled beneath a cocoon of blankets, teeth chattering audibly. Sollux sat next to him, trying to act as a human space heater, but nothing was seeming to have much effect. 

“Fuck,” He was saying. “This sucks, this really really sucks.” No one could offer words of comfort, what do you say to someone who is painfully dying? They continued trying to warm him up, using a combination of hot water, blankets and people until finally he fell asleep, but not after saying “Dying sucks. It really does.” 

Kanaya was sitting on his other side at this point, she just strengthened her hold on his shoulders and rocked back and forth slowly. 

He slept and slept and slept until, upon waking the other day Kanaya started crying. This should’ve shocked John, she was always so calm and collected, but he didn’t know if he could feel shock the right way again. 

“It’s the last stage, isn’t it?” Sollux asked bitterly and Kanaya nodded. Sollux took her silence as a yes. John thought back to the girl they’d found on the street in the West side all those months ago. They took her back and she...fell asleep. And they told him that she wouldn’t wake up again. 

Kanaya stayed with Karkat’s head in her lap, stroking his hair. He wasn’t still, he tossed and turned and talked and occasionally cried without waking up. His forehead went from ice cold to burning hot and back again in the space of a day, forehead covered in a cold sweat. This lasted three days. 

They took shifts staying with him, sleeping on the couch, trying to keep him warm or cool. At the beginning of the fourth day John woke up to see that everything was still. There was no sound, no water running or pots bubbling or frantic fevered murmuring. There were no quick footsteps or quiet sobs. He looked to see Karkat lying on the couch, Sollux slumped next to him, holding his hand. John saw the image flash of the same position but reversed, Sollux unconscious on the table after the harrowing surgery, Karkat grabbing his hand as the both of them slept. 

Sollux had a frozen expression on his face. It was obvious he hadn’t slept the entire night. Karkat was still, face blank, eyes closed, hand limp in Sollux’s. Kanaya and Terezi were sleeping on the other couch, limbs tangled, oblivious. Jade was in the bottom bunk on the wall. All was still. Karkat was dead.


	33. Aftershock

The whole day was very surreal. There were a few things said, upon waking, upon the wrapping of the body in old sheets, upon leaving the Bunker, but John didn’t really comprehend any of them. He was on autopilot, picking up a shovel, climbing up the ladder, trailing behind the small funeral procession all the way to the graveyard. It looked even smaller and stupider, nowhere near the kind of place Karkat deserved to end up. He didn’t deserve to end up in the ground at age 14. No one did. 

Kanaya was carrying him, almost cradling his body, tiny in death, wrapped in an old sheet. Her eyes were blank, staring ahead. Karkat and Kanaya had always had an odd almost mother-son relationship. She was who found him, and brought him to the Bunker in the first place. She had been in Haven so long, too long not to form attachments. Terezi was in the front of the line, jaw clenched, clutching her cane. She had yelled upon waking up, seeing what had happened, but then clamped her hand over her own mouth and retreated into silence. 

Sollux and Jade were behind her, clasping hands, Sollux’s arm over his face. He was crying, he hadn’t stopped for most of the morning. His echoing sobs were the only sound as the group made their way to the little grave lot. It was like a ghost town, the neighborhood was quiet and empty. 

They took shifts gravedigging. It was as unpleasant as the last time John had dug a grave, but this time he couldn’t think about it, not about who was going in it. The body was just a body under a sheet, it didn’t need a face or a name or anything at all. 

“John?” Jade’s voice was soft and tentative. He looked up. 

“You should take a break, you’ve been going for a while.” 

John nodded and dumped the shovel, clambering out of the hole. His arms felt like they were floating but his palms stung where he had pushed them into the handle. He fell   
backwards, gazing up at the stars as the breathing and groaning of his friends faded into background noise. 

And then it was Jade again, shaking his shoulder. He sat up shakily, and watched as Terezi gently laid his body in the now sizable hole. 

“Thank you,” She said quietly, then climbed out. Nobody wanted to say anything else. John grabbed a handful of dirt from the pile beneath him and swung his fist out to throw it onto the body. the dirt gently cascaded down, speckling the old sheet with brown. He tried to stand, legs wobbling, then fell back. He couldn’t. Couldn’t look, couldn’t stand up, couldn't stand anything. 

The next thing he knew it was Jade, pulling him upright. The grave was a smooth pile of dirt. His knees buckled, but Jade didn’t let him fall, pulling his arm over her shoulders. She held onto him tightly, and pulled John along, all the way back to the Bunker, all the way onto the couch while she held him as he shook and sobbed for what seemed like several days. It was like the time on the roof, the same yet a hundred times worse. 

No matter how much each of them wished it to cease, life, as it always did, went on. They couldn’t afford to get rid of Karkat’s things with supplies so tight, but they put them out of sight for awhile. His bunk was made and remained untouched, couches moved back into their original positions, everyone trying their hardest to act at least somewhat normal. 

They all busied themselves with the ever-growing task of trying to find enough food to feed all of them each day. 

Sollux, who barely spoke since Karkat died, had taken to wandering around on his own again. John was briefly reminded of the conversation between the two of them wherein he’d said that he was only sticking around until Karkat died, but Sollux always came back within a day or two. 

“Anything?” John asked hopefully as Kanaya trudged into the bunker, pulling off her oversized coat and gloves. She shook her head. 

“Just more bodies, looks like they starved to death.” She walked and sat on the couch, looking dejected. 

“I’m really sorry. There’s just no food left over here.” 

“It’s okay, it’s not your fault,” John said, his stomach grumbling. They hadn’t eaten since yesterday morning. “We pretty much live in a ghost town now. And besides, maybe Jade and Terezi found something.” Kanaya shrugged and leaned back, sighing. 

Just then Terezi walked through the door emptyhanded. John groaned slightly. She glared at him, then beckoned with her hand. Kanaya handed John the oversize coat. He slipped it on, following Terezi out the door and up the trapdoor into the chilly night air. 

“What’s going on?” 

“I think I may have found a way to get us food. But I need to talk to you first. Let’s walk.”


	34. Explanations and Goodbyes

“What is it?” John asked, the words spilling out in a fog of cold air. Terezi took a deep breath, her head tilted down. She looked so much younger out of her ridiculous Redglare outfit, and now in an oversized men’s coat and scarf she looked tiny, now far shorter than John. 

“There are people who owe me things...people over on the West side. If I go I can most likely--” 

“No way! Did you even hear what Snowman was telling you? She’ll kill you if you step foot over there.” 

“I’m fast. And quiet. I grew up there John, I know my way around.” 

“Are you kidding? She beat you up in front of all of us and threatened to kill you. They can find us, Snowman found the Bunker easy enough.” 

Terezi stopped, grabbing John’s arm and spinning him towards her. 

“Look around. There’s no one here anymore, do you see anyone?” 

“No.” 

“That’s because everyone’s dead. They’re starving us out, everyone who lived here relied on trade and bartering. The food drop was the last one, so anyone who went and survived it isn’t planning on giving it away for anything.” 

“But--” 

“John we are starving. All the people we used to see or trade with are dead or hiding. There’s no new people coming in, have you noticed? It’s been that way for months now. Even the guards outside the gates are gone. We’re on our own, and it’s my job to make sure you guys get enough to eat!” 

“Why is it your job? It’s all of our responsibility.” 

“It’s because I’m not like you guys. I’m not a good person, I’ve done so many fucked up things and I’m trying to do a little bit of good before I go, okay? I’m the only one besides Kanaya who could possibly survive long enough on the East side to get food, and unlike her I don’t have morals.” 

“Terezi please don’t. You won’t come back.” 

She paused, chewing her lip. 

“I think I can make it. I’m not stupid.” 

“What you’re planning is pretty damn stupid.” 

“John we haven’t eaten in almost two days, and there are six, I mean five of us to feed.” 

“It’s not worth it! We can just keep foraging around here.” 

“Either I go or we all die, both of us know that there isn’t anything left here.” 

“But--” 

“Stop trying to get me to change my mind. I’m going, that’s not why I brought you here.” 

“Why then? Why not just sneak off, like you used to?” 

Terezi ignored the last comment, digging deep into her jacket pocket to pull out a tattered, folded piece of paper, which she shoved into John’s hands. It was soft and stained yellow. He opened it to a picture of two dark-skinned smiling girls, maybe six or seven years old. 

“Me and my sister” Terezi said, “Before everything happened.” John studied the photo more closely. Terezi was the smaller of the two recognizable barely by her wide toothed grin. Vriska was taller, longer hair, sharper features. She was smiling as well, John saw no trace of her older self in the young, innocent brown eyes. 

“I don’t know exactly what Kanaya or anyone told you about me,” she said, looking down again, “But I need someone to know the truth. Just in case something happens. I need someone to know that I never meant to hurt her.” 

She sat down, in the middle of the street and took a shaky breath. 

“My sister was my best friend. We lived in a really poor, tiny town not too far from here. My mother worked all day, so she was in charge of taking care of me, protecting me. It was a bad time everywhere, it was when the disease was most rampant. You wouldn’t know what it was like, you were too young. It was terrible, everyone was scared and confused. Blood tests were required nearly everyday, but no one in our town knew how the disease was spreading, but people were being carted off every day, and least five or six. No one knew what happened to them, only terrible rumors. 

It was like the world was ending. Me and Vriska barely left the house, only to go get food. Schools were shut down, but it didn’t matter, none of us spoke English anyways. I was seven when she was taken. It was less official then, she went to get dinner and never came back. I stayed home. I waited and waited and eventually my mother came back to find me still waiting by the door. She went out and looked for my sister, but came back alone. We knew what had happened and that night I cried and cried and hoped that it was all a dream. 

She was eight, and I knew that even though she was tough, she could never survive in the hell that people spoke of. People were superstitious back then, they threw my mom out of her job, threw bricks and paint at our house. I didn’t step outside for months. We were hungry and afraid and grieving. 

And then a year later it was my turn. I was with my mother. The man at the corner stopped us, grabbing my hand, pricking blood, putting in into the machine. It started   
flashing and in an instant he had grabbed me, forcing a surgical mask over my face and tying my hands behind my back. I screamed, and my mother tried to grab me but the man kicked her to the ground and then spoke into his radio. 

The black van came and I was shoved inside. 

I was in the car for hours. The only thing I clung onto was the slim hope that I would see my sister again, that she would protect me, that it would be like old times again, playing pretend. 

I came to the city under cover of darkness. I was escorted out of the van by men with large guns. They untied my hands and shoved me inside the gate. I didn’t resist, but ran deep into the first street I saw, staying quiet. The dark didn’t scare me, but the people did. 

They were tall, with horns and glowing eyes and they prowled the streets in dark clothing, barely exchanging words. There were bodies everywhere, foul smelling shapes covered in odd colored blood. I hid for many days before I found her. 

My sister wasn’t the same. 

Her skin was grey and covered in filth, hair matted and cut with a knife, it looked like. Her eyes were yellow and constantly filled with fear. The second she saw me walking down the street she pulled me into a side alley and hugged me, but I could sense her still looking around. She was jittery all the time, jumping at the slightest movement, sleeping with one eye open clutching a knife to her chest.” 

Terezi paused for a moment, breathing heavily. John held the silence, waiting until she finally slowed and began talking again. 

“We used to play pretend, when we were little. We were different people, princesses, knights, dragons, always someone fantastic who could easily escape our life of poverty and disease. I realized that she was doing the same thing there. I saw her kill someone for coming within ten feet of me, a girl no more than eleven or twelve. 

She told me it was just like playing pretend. It wasn’t her that killed the girl, it was someone she had become. She told me to do it too, that’s the only way I wouldn’t be dead. 

And so it happened. I was seven when I killed someone for the first time. He was small, and not much older than me. He had tried to take our food. But it wasn’t me, I told myself. It was just like playing pretend. 

We spent years on our own before the Sylph heard of us. She took us in, probably didn’t want to make enemies of us more than anything. We had earned a reputation by then, we were killing just for the hell of it. 

She gave us food, taught us English and taught us to fight. We paid her back by taking care of people she didn’t want around. She ruled Haven, and we were on her side, basking in the riches that came with. 

I was content. People knew me as a bounty hunter, I killed who I was told and was loyal to the Sylph. My sister was different, though. She was crazy. The year she had spent alone as a child had taken a toll, and she wasn’t satisfied. 

When she was sixteen she met Kanaya, who at the time was famous for her brutal chainsaw killings and cold temper. I was a little afraid of her to be honest. But they were in love, and shortly after my sister left the Sylph, and I followed. We were still loyal to her, but she let us go, knowing we had grown up. 

I traveled with Kanaya and Vriska for about a month, but couldn’t stay. We took separate paths. From the rumors I heard, my sister was getting worse and worse. She became sort of an urban legend, murdering left and right, and worse things too. Torture, abuse. Separated from it all, I began to feel remorse. 

I left the West and traveled, and stayed in the bunker for a short time. I met everyone, but most importantly Aradia. She was smart, and we got along well. One day Kanaya showed up looking for me, saying that she had left Vriska because she was getting out of hand, and that she was going to come and kill all of my friends. 

I was so scared of her, you understand. Aradia was fierce and brave, however, and she helped me set up a plan. The plan wasn’t supposed to kill her, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. 

It was my fault she died. I was a coward, too scared to face up to my big sister, too scared to make her punish for the things she had done. We both paid for it. 

After Aradia died I couldn’t return to the Bunker, not after what had happened. I couldn’t face up to them. 

The next time I saw her I was stronger. I killed her. I shouldn’t have. But I just wanted you to know, John. I never meant to hurt her.” 

There was a long pause. 

“I’m so sorry.” Was all he could say. She nodded and stood up. 

“Now you understand why I’m leaving. I caused so much pain. I need to make up for it.” She crouched down, kissing John softly on the cheek, grabbing his hand with her gloved one. 

“I will make it all up, I promise. Don’t forget what I told you.” She stood up, slipping her hand out of his. 

She walked forward, turned a corner and was gone.


	35. The Return

“Did you hear something?” 

“Are you hearing shit now too?” 

“No, no seriously I think someone’s above us.” 

“Who would it be? We’re all here…” 

“Is it Terezi do you think?” 

“She’s only been gone a week.” 

“If it was here she wouldn’t been down here already.” 

“What else would someone want with us? All that’s up there is broken mannequins and shit.” 

“Someone should go check.” 

Jade groaned, sitting up slowly. The room swooped and tilted as she pulled herself to her feet with a shaking arm. 

“Be right back,” she gasped, wincing as a jolt of pain stabbed through her stomach. Leaving heavily on the wall, she crossed the room, past the barely-conscious forms of John, Kanaya and Sollux. 

The space from the doorway to the ladder seemed to multiply by ten as she struggled along the wall, willing herself not to pass out. 

A minute later she reached the ladder, hands shaking so hard she was sure she wouldn’t be able to make it up. The trapdoor opened to the dark interior of the store. A dark shape tumbled down, hitting Jade on the head and knocking her to the floor. Two more shapes followed, smacking down on either side of her, then the trapdoor was slammed shut. Jade groaned. The ground around her was littered with objects of various sizes and shapes, spilling from the bags. She reached for the nearest one, a small cylinder, and held it up, peering at the writing on it. 

Chicken Noodle Soup. 

“Oh my god,” She whispered, sitting up and staring around her. It was food, the ground was littered with packages and boxes and cans. None of them had eaten in over a week. 

“Guys!” She called, tearing open a package of crackers and shoving them in her mouth as quickly as possible. “GUYS!”   
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“There’s a note attached, look!” John said, after they’d finally all eaten their full and put the rest carefully in the cupboards. He lay sprawled out on the couch next to Sollux. 

“Read it, then” Sollux grumbled. John cleared his throat and read the writing aloud 

“Hello! It’s Terezi! Expect a package of food every week from here on out. It’s the least I could do, but now you guys don’t have to be worried about this. I’m afraid that I’m going to have to stay here a little while longer, so don’t expect me back too soon, but I promise that I’ll come soon enough, probably a month or two. Stay safe, love Terezi.” 

“Every week?” Sollux asked in disbelief. John’s face split into a wide grin. They were safe! From starvation at least, but better than nothing. Jade started laughing, a high pitched giggle, and then Kanaya joined in, and Sollux and then John. They were properly full, for the first time in months, and would stay that way. Everything, at that moment, seemed pretty okay. 

A month passed. Then two, then three, then four. Three bags of food were dropped through the trapdoor every week per Terezi’s instruction, but she herself hadn’t appeared. Sweaters were traded for tee shirts which in turn were traded for no shirts. 

Five months. With hardly anything better to do, John sat long periods of times on top of buildings, staring off into the West, looking for a glimpse of red. 

Six months. Kanaya started re-mapping the entire East side of the city, often taking off for days at a time. 

Eight months. Jade began sprouting horns, which were triangular shaped, sort of like animal ears. John called her a furry and Jade smacked his head. 

Eleven months. Sollux noticed he was running out of breath quicker than before. He kept it to himself. 

One year later, John sat on the roof, wrapped in several sweaters to fend off the wind and stared down at the picture Terezi had given him. He glanced off to the West, the jagged skyline filling him with a sense of unease. She was still there, he knew it. The food, though decreasing in amount, was delivered with the same frequency. There had been one more note, about a month back that simply said “Miss you. Stay safe. -T.” 

Most of the others had lost hope, he could tell, but John knew that Terezi would come home soon. He glanced up at the sky, a few wispy clouds lingered around the yellow winter moon. His breath came out in streams of fog. 

They had long given up trying to keep track of the days, but winter meant that spring was coming, and with that would be his next birthday. He hadn’t done anything last year, everyone still fairly shell-shocked from Karkat. How old was he turning again? 15? It didn’t feel like it. He felt he had aged considerably more in the past two years than most people did in twenty. He was an adult now, whether he looked it or not. 

The city was chock full of inhabitants a year ago, but now it resembled nothing more than a ghost town. Occasionally John would see a tower of smoke, remnants of something, hopefully not people, burning. 

Terezi was gone sixteen months. It was spring, the desert sun beginning to return earlier each day, forcing everyone inside for longer hours. Jade woke at dusk, exiting the Bunker to check for new packages. 

The sky outside was still pink and purple, but the sun was down so there wasn’t harm in going outside. The shreds of light that remained cast the street into gray gloom. She stepped outside, a slight breeze rippling through her waist-length, tangled hair. A drop of something splashed on the top of her cheek. 

She wiped it off, confused. The sky was clear. She looked down at her finger. A teal smudge sat on top of the grey. And all at once, her heart seized seemed to drop to below her feet. Another drop fell on the top of her head, she shrieked and stumbled backwards, falling hard on the rough pavement. 

Her eyes raised, staring upwards at the figure strung over the door. Terezi’s throat was slit, teal blood pouring down her front, dripping off the tips of her dangling red boots. Her head was tilted forward and she hung by a rope wrapped around her neck, coming from the second floor window. 

Her breath came quicker, her entire body shuddering. She couldn’t let out more than a squeak, and couldn’t tear her eyes away fromt the body, slightly bobbing from the wind. She heard a noise from inside and looked down to see John’s head emerging from the trapdoor. He looked out, saw Jade and then waved. She shook her head violently, trying to find her voice, he couldn’t come out here---couldn’t see---he was the only one who thought she was still alive. 

John’s smile faded into a look of concern as he started towards Jade. But he was taller, much taller and the tip of her boot hung down too low. It brushed the tip of John’s horn and he looked up. 

There was a brief pause in which everything collapsed. 

John screamed, he ran backwards into Jade. He was on the ground, grabbing her shoulders. 

“No, no no no…” He was saying softly, shaking his head, eyes fixated on her. Jade turned and puked onto the cracked pavement. 

Kanaya came, quickly. She took a glance at the figure and her jaw set, eyes flickered. She walked over quickly, pulling Jade and John to their feet, leading them back inside. 

“Stay here.” Her words were blunt, but her voice wavered. "I'll get her down."


	36. Beginning of The End

Kanaya cut Terezi’s body down from the window, letting it flop against the pavement below, retreating back into the part of herself that was impervious to pain. They tried to clean her up as best they could, straighten her crudely snapped neck and wash the blood off, but she went into the ground looking battered.

They buried her next to Karkat. It took a long time. With every shovel stroke, John felt more and more like he was digging his own grave. It was only a matter of time, now. The thing about Terezi was that she had seemed so invincible, from the moment he met her it was clear that Redglare was a powerful force to be reckoned with. She wasn’t supposed to have ended up like this, dangling over the doorway of her own home, beaten. She was supposed to have come home whole.

“Why can’t anything ever go right for a change?” John yelled angrily, throwing down his shovel. Everyone paused.

“I mean it’s fucking ridiculous!” He threw his hands up. “We can’t get one good thing around here? Not without digging another freaking grave.”

“John…” Kanaya said softly. He shook his head violently, tears starting to prick up in his eyes.

“I mean we got food but so what? I’d rather have her here and safe.”

“We’d be dead.”

“So? We’re all gonna be dead soon anyways why does it fucking matter when. It’s a lost cause in here, we all died the moment we stepped through the gates.”

“John maybe you should go back.” Jade said after a moment. “We can finish.”

John picked up his shovel, hands shaking.

“No...we gotta finish this before the sun goes up.”

Three Days later

“John?”

“Yeah?”

“The food didn’t come today.”

“I know.”

“It isn’t coming anymore, is it?”

John took a deep breath .

“It’s over.” Lose-lose. Terezi gave them what they could, but it wasn’t enough. Jade slumped back on the couch. They had enough food saved to last them maybe a week or two, but not more.

“What do we do?” She asked no one in particular.

“We go West.” Kanaya answered curtly.

“But--” John objected.

“We almost starved waiting for Terezi last time. This time there’s no one to wait for. We’re going to die here if we stay.”

There was a long moment of silence. Then,

“I’m not going.” Sollux sat in the back of the bottom bunk, almost out of view in the dark room.

“What?” Said John and Jade and Kanaya said “Look, I know it’s dangerous but--”

“I’m next on the dying order, and I’m already blind. There’s no point in me coming along. I’m just gonna slow you down.”

“Sollux, you’re not slowing us down. We’re not leaving you, you’re our family.”

“Please, I already don’t have enough energy to run. My breath is short and I get super dizzy and--I just don’t want to be the cause of your guys’ death.”

“We’ll take care of you! You’re not gonna make us die,” Jade said, looking concerned.

“Look, the West is awful, and worse right now. I guarantee that you’re going to be running from fucking psychopaths ten times a day. I’d slow you down, and we’d get murdered within half an hour.”

“Sollux please, you have to come. We’re not leaving you here alone.”

He took a deep, shaky breath.

“You don’t have to. I’m leaving.”

“Leaving?” John exclaimed. “This is quarantine city where the hell are you going?”

“Outside. Out of the city.”

“What? You’ll die. There’s nothing but desert for a hundred miles at least.”

“That’s the point.” There was another pause. Then Kanaya spoke up.

“Oh no. Fuck no. You are not ending this by killing yourself.”

“Kanaya, please try to understand--”

“No!” She stood up, striding over and yanking Sollux out of the back of the bed and into view. “You aren’t taking everything I sacrificed, what Terezi sacrificed and throwing it away!”

“I’m a lost cause don’t you get that? Nothing I do is ever by choice! I’m in this fucking city because I had bad luck as a kid, I’m blind because some asshole picked a fight with me, I’m dying of something I never wanted or deserved. Please, I need to do something on my own terms. I need to end this right. I don’t want to end up like Karkat.”

“Don’t you dare talk shit about him now or I swear--”

“He was pathetic!” Sollux yelled, stepping backwards out of Kanaya’s grasp. “He was pathetic when he died, he lost all of his dignity in the course of two fucking weeks. I can’t do that! I can’t go out helpless and weak and--” He broke off, pushing the heels of his palms over his eye sockets.

“I’ve been thinking about this for a while. The guards beside the gates are gone. I’ll walk along the road.”

“Sollux, is this really preferable? You’re going to scorch to death if you don’t die of thirst first.”

“When I die, it’s going to be on my own terms. It’s not going to be when I collapse in some filthy alleyway on the West side surrounded by other bodies. I need to do one thing in my life, have one choice that’s completely mine.”

Kanaya stared at him, scrawny and tall and defiant. She knew what she had to do. She reached out her arm and pulled Sollux into her chest, hugging him tightly. He was breathing quickly, arms crossed.

“I’m so sorry it turned out this way, kiddo.” She spoke softly into his hair, adding on the nickname she’d given him when they’d met. He starting crying, softly, relaxing into her embrace. John and Jade quickly stood up, each wrapping their arms around Sollux and Kanaya. They stood, swaying slightly, breathing heavily. A few tears were shed.

“When are you leaving?” Kanaya asked.

“Now. Before I can’t.”

Sollux refused to take any food or water. “I don’t want it to be drawn out.” His hand was clasped tightly in Jade’s as the small group walked towards the closest gate. The streets were empty, the night was warm and windy but the entire group shuddered.

The reached the black gate, looming but devoid of any life.

“We’re here,” John said, rasping slightly. His throat was incredibly dry. Tears were pouring down Jade’s round cheeks, she stared upwards without saying anything.

“Is it open?” Sollux asked. He sounded casual but his voice wavered.

“No. We’re gonna climb over.”

A few short minutes later they stood on the empty pavement. The road stretched into the distance, straight with no interruptions. They were in a sea of black and purple sand, the sky an overarching splatter of stars. John took a deep breath, thinking this was the last time he would ever be outside the city.

Sollux stood, the wind rippling his hair. He squared his shoulders.

“I should go. Got a lot of ground to cover before the sun comes up. He turned around, half-grinning.

“This is it, I suppose.” Jade, stifling a sniff, pulled him into a fierce hug. He returned it, bowing his head. John was next, hugging Sollux with as much effort as he could muster. He thought of their first encounter, a strange, bitter seventh grader with odd glasses and mismatched eyes. They had both grown so much since then. Kanaya was last. Her embrace lasted several seconds. A few words were whispered into Sollux’s ear. He nodded. She let go, cradling his head and pressing her lips gently against his forehead. A tear dripped from Sollux’s chin to the dry pavement. Kanaya spun him around, facing the horizon.

“It’s a straight shot.” She said. “Right to the end. You can do it.” Sollux nodded.

“Until we meet again.” He began to walk, a slow pace. Jade grabbed John and Kanaya’s hands, clasping them tight. They stood until Sollux was just a silhouette, until he was swallowed up by the shadows and then they stood and watched the shifting and changing of the night for a long while.

 

Two weeks later 

"Well that's it," Kanaya announced, looking at the empty cupboard.  "We're out.  We should probably leave soon."  

“What if we can’t find food over there?”

“I don’t know. We’ll die probably. But leaving later gives us better odds. I’m going out, seeing if there’s any weapons or clothes I can find before we leave. Be back in a couple hours. And when I get back, you two are getting proper violence training.”

“What?”

“We’re going to hell, John. You’re gonna have to know how to kill people.” Kanaya left, slamming the door behind her. John paused in sweeping the dusty floor, staring down at the old broom in his hands. Kill people? The thought of even having a weapon in his hand made him sick to his stomach. He had killed someone before, he thought, something he had been trying to desperately avoid to do. The future was looking incredibly grim.

Jade emerged from the bathroom. “It’s gonna suck, isn’t it?” John nodded. “I’m scared.” She said. “It was nice here. Not ideal, but the best that we could’ve got.”

“I’m scared too. Of dying, obviously but also of doing bad things. Just like, hearing from Terezi and Kanaya I just don’t want that to happen to me. I don’t want to end up  
needing to kill people to feel alive.”

“I know. I just--” The door to the Bunker re-opened. Kanaya walked in, an incredulous expression on her face.

“Didn’t you just leave?” John asked, starting to sweep again. “What--” He was interrupted by a shriek from Jade. Alarmed, he looked quickly from her to the door and what he saw made his legs drop out from under him.

Standing behind Kanaya looking fearful, tall and a hell of a lot older were Rose and Dave.


	37. The End

John scrambled up from the floor, bounding towards Rose and Dave with Jade fast on his heels. All four of them collided, ending up in a pile on the floor. 

“How--how are you here?” Jade said, half laughing. “Are you sick?” She asked suddenly, sitting up. Rose, who was flat on her back, shook her head. 

Jade stood up, pulling John back from Rose and Dave. “You can’t be here--we’re all super contagious and--!” 

“No, we’re immune.” 

“You’re what?” 

“They developed a vaccine a few years back. Everyone’s immune. It’s over.” 

“Oh my god,” John said, getting to his feet. The disease was had been around since before he was born, and to just have it be fixed so quickly was mind-boggling. 

“Why are you here then?” Jade asked, pulling Dave to his feet. 

“We’re here to get you out.” He answered curtly. 

“Out? Like out, for good?” He nodded. “But why now? Like, why not when everyone was immunized?” 

“Okay, do you remember when your food supply got cut off?” John and Jade both nodded. 

“It was a fucking nightmare…” Kanaya said quietly from behind them. 

“Well that was one solution. They elected to cut off the food supply in the hopes that the majority of you would die ‘naturally’ and then after five years they would come in and level the city.” 

“What the fuck kind of solution is that?” Jade said indignantly. 

“It was awful! The way they talked about everyone in here, you weren’t even considered people anymore.” 

“But in the end they gave you five years,” Dave continued, “Instead of their original plan, which was going in and killing everyone immediately. 

“So why are you here? It can’t have been five years already.” 

“No, there was a change of plans.” 

“What happened?” 

“Well, about a week ago they found a body out in the desert. It was weird, no one had ever really thought of anybody with the disease leaving.” John felt a pang of horror in his stomach. He made eye contact with Kanaya, who looked slightly sick. 

“It was crazy, it was just some kid, but he was all scorched and bloody and it looked like his eyes had been gorged out. Like, that is so fucked up!” Dave was saying. Jade’s lip was quivering. 

“And anyways people naturally flipped shit. Most of them hadn’t seen someone affected since like twenty years ago, and then they were all like ‘oh my god what kind of conditions are there in that city?’, which is what me and Rose had been so pissed about this entire time.” 

“So we tried to use it to raise awareness and convince people to forget the Haven project and instead re-focus on proper care,” Rose interrupted, looking slightly concerned   
at John and Jade’s reaction. 

“But that were just pointless because three days later they were like ‘okay this project is shit let’s bomb everything’.” 

“We knew you guys were still alive. I mean, we didn’t actually know but I didn’t want to think about the alternative. And if there was any shot at saving you this was it.” 

“So you came here?” Jade asked. “How?” 

“We stole my brother’s car and drove the entire night. And then we came in and were wandering around when your friend found us.” 

“Good thing everyone else around here is dead,” Kanaya said bitterly, “otherwise you two would’ve been stabbed within ten minutes.” 

“You stole a car? Do you even have a license?” Rose and Dave looked at each other. 

“I have a learners permit,” Rose said. But that’s beside the point. The point is that we’re going to rescue you before this whole place gets blown up!” 

“Oh my god. When is this going to happen exactly?” John still could hardly believe his eyes. Dave and Rose were standing in the bunker, his home for the past several years. They were different, more mature, a little sadder. Rose’s eyeshadow was toned down and better applied; Dave’s hair stuck up more and he had grown nearly a foot. 

“A week? A month? We don’t really know. They weren’t clear about, didn’t want to cause a panic. The only reason we know they’re gonna bomb is because of my mom and her scientist privileges.” 

“Your mom is in on it?” 

“Well no, she was one of the main voices against the entire idea. But there weren’t many and she was easily overpowered.” 

“So does she know you’re here?” 

“Oh hell no. She just thinks I’m staying out for the weekend.” 

"So can you really take us back? Where would we go?" 

"Home. John, your dad moved in with us a while back, and there's plenty of room for you too. And Jade, we don't actually know where your grandfather is but when he comes back in town we can let him know. In the meantime you should stay in my house too." Rose said. 

"But how would that work? Wouldn't you guys get in trouble?" 

"It's worth the risk," Dave said. "It's gonna kinda suck probably but we'd just keep you inside all day and then you can go out at night a bit. We brought some stuff to help with that," he indicated the backpack thrown over his shoulder. 

"Stuff like what?" 

"Extra clothes, face paint shit, the whole works. There's just a little problem though." 

"What is the problem?" Kanaya asked sharply. 

"We didn't know you guys would have the...the things on your head." 

"The horns?" 

"Yeah. It's gonna be hard to hide those we'll get spotted for sure." 

"I can take care of that," Kanaya said, walking over to the coffee table and removing the pile of dishes and clothes. 

"You can?" 

"You are going to take these kids out of here and get them a life, and a pair of horns isn't gonna stop them. Which one of you wants to go first?" She looked and John and Jade, who instantly realized what she was about to do. 

"Oh fuck," Jade whispered. 

"I'm not taking no for an answer. Lie down on the table." Kanaya strode into the side room as Jade shakily lay down on the battered coffee table. Dave gave Rose a   
questioning look; she shrugged. 

John walked and knelt beside Jade, grabbing her arm tightly. 

"Come and hold her other side," he said to Rose and Dave, who advanced with confused expressions. 

"What is she gonna do?" Dave asked. Jade wiggled her arm out of his grip and reached down to find a washcloth, then promptly stuffed it in her own mouth. 

"What are you--?" Rose's voice was interrupted by a mechanical growl as Kanaya emerged from the side room carrying her vibrating chainsaw. 

"Hold her!" Kanaya yelled, John grabbed Jade's wrist. Rose and Dave had identical expressions of horror. John turned away as the chainsaw came down. Jade's body spasmed, she let out a muffled scream. Her eyes were pressed tightly shut, green liquid oozing from the dark orange stump. 

"One more!" Kanaya yelled. 

This time Jade didn't scream, just exhaled sharply then slumped down, not moving. Kanaya turned off the chainsaw and quickly grabbed a rag to press to her head. John pulled the napkin out of her mouth gingerly. Rose and Dave sat, still hanging on to her other arm, looking shellshocked. 

"Is she okay?" Rose asked meekly. 

"She's fine," John answered, pulling her unconcious form into his arms and depositing her on the couch. "Passed out from the pain. Happens a lot." 

"Happens a lot? How often do you guys do this?" 

"You know the guy in the desert with his eyes gouged out?" John asked, lying down on the bloodstained table. 

"Yes?" Said Dave warily. 

"That was Kanaya. It was pretty bad." 

"She stabbed someone's eyes out? What the fuck are you doing?" 

John stuffed the wet rag in his mouth. It tasted of dust and really old ramen flavoring, he thought to distract himself. 

"No someone else stabbed his eyes. I removed them because they would get infected and kill him."   
Dave looked at John in disbelief. He nodded. Dave shrugged, then tightened his grip on John's arm as Kanaya restarted the chainsaw. Rose's hands shook as she placed them firmly on his other hand. He focused on her slim, cool fingers, not thinking about the chainsaw, not thinking about the chainsaw, not thinking--- 

There was a flash of intense pain, then John's eyes rolled back and there was nothing but darkness. 

Kanaya quickly removed the second horn, then switched off the chainsaw. She staunched the bleeding on John's head, then deposited him on the couch, rag pressed to his head. She turned to the guests, who were still looking a bit disturbed. 

"I'm sorry about how I'm coming across. I haven't seen uninfected people for ten years, I forget how peaceful a climate you're used to." 

"It's fine," Rose answered quickly, "we're so grateful that you reunited us with John and Jade again." 

"Yes, about that. I need to tell you a few things, before they wake up." 

"A few things?" 

“The horns are going to grow back. Next time use painkillers and something that can effectively saw them down. Keep them out of the sun, and use some sort of makeup if they go out at night.” 

The two teens nodded. Kanaya took a deep breath and continued. 

"John and Jade aren't the children that were sent in. They have changed, have grown and have seen things that I hope the two of you will never have to. In comparison to many, the city was kind to them, but they have still undergone so much suffering. There is plentiful amounts of grief that has not yet been acknowledged, from recent losses as well as past ones. Let them grieve, and understand if they are not the same leaving as they once were." The two teens nodded solemnly. Kanaya continued. 

"As you may as well know, taking them from here will not cure them. Jade has maybe ten years and John fifteen, at the most. Or they could have as little as another year. There are patterns, but they are often not followed. They will not be able to lead a full life like you will. Their lives at effectively done now."

"They're not," Dave interjected. Rose shoved his shoulder. "Their lives aren't over. They have time, they have a home, they have us." Kanaya smiled.

"They are so very lucky. But the most important thing is that you cannot get caught, under any circumstance. You and anyone else connected will be arrested, and they will most likely be killed." 

"What about you?" Rose asked. "This offer extends to you as well. We have a big house, there's room for one more." Kanaya shook her head slowly. 

"It's not my place..." She glanced around the room. So many empty beds. "I've used up my time. There's no one waiting for me anymore.” 

“Do they know?” Rose asked, glancing at the still forms of John and Jade. Kanaya shook her head. 

“They’re not going to like the idea, but I hope that eventually they will understand.” Rose nodded, and Kanaya continued. 

“All in all we are extremely fortunate that you didn’t give up hope. I couldn’t save most of the children who passed through here, but knowing that these two got out means more to me than I can say.” 

“Thank you for keeping them safe,” Dave said out of the silence. “They wouldn’t have made it on their own. Especially John.” 

Kanaya smiled. “So I gathered.” There was a groan from the corner of the room as John and Jade began stirring. Kanaya stood, grabbing a coat and backpack from the couch and pulling them on. She walked over to Jade first, leaning down, whispering something up close. Jade shook her head and pulled Kanaya down into a hug. Kanaya struggled out of her grasp a moment later and moved on to John. 

“What’s goin’ on?” He muttered, confused. 

“I’m not coming with you. I’m going to the West.” 

“No, no you’re coming. You’ve gotta come, we’re gonna live!” 

She shook her head. “I don’t have much time left. I don’t have a family waiting for me.” 

“We’re your family Kanaya. Please, you have to come.” 

“Most of my family here is dead. I can’t leave when they couldn’t. I’m going to the West. I’m finding whoever killed Terezi and making sure they pay for it.” 

“No you don’t need to do that. You need to come with us. It’s gonna get bombed anyways. You’re gonna die here.” 

“Aradia and Sollux and Terezi and Karkat have all died here, under my care. I can’t leave when they didn’t get the chance. I’m sorry.” 

“Kanaya, please.” 

“You have to leave, John. You and Jade, go have a life. My life has already been spent but yours is barely beginning. Haven is my whole world, but it will just be a dark patch in yours. Stay safe and remember to live.” She stood, wrenching her hand out of John’s grip and grabbed her chainsaw. She turned and strode past Dave and Rose. 

“Take care of them. Close the door on the way out.” She drew herself up to her full height and walked down the hallway, then up the ladder, then she was gone. 

“Fuck!” John yelled in a strained voice, pushing himself out of bed to a swaying standing position. He took a few shaky steps towards the door then toppled forward, Dave running forward to catch him, lowering them both to the floor. John yelled into Dave’s shoulder and clenched his fists. Jade lay on the bed with her palms pressing into her eyes. She kicked the mattress, shaking her entire body. Rose stepped forward, laying a hand gently on her arm. 

“Jade, we’ve gotta go. We have to get back before the sun comes up.” She shook her head violently, tears falling from under her pressed hands. Rose sighed, then grabbed Jade under the knees and back and pulled her out of the bed. She was so small, Rose noticed. She hadn’t grown an inch. Jade shook her head and flailed until Rose put her down. 

“I can’t--” She said, pulling her hands away, blood pooling in her matted hair. 

“Come on,” Rose said, putting her arm under Jade’s and half lifting, half pulling her across the room and out the door.   
John and Dave sat in silence for a moment, John still dizzy and confused and crying. 

“Her house is gonna be pretty full now,” Dave said. “Rose’s I mean. Your dad lives there now, and Rose’s mom along with a fuckton of cats. I don’t really like cats because the baby ones always tangle up all the wires of everything I own and generally piss on my backpack every time I come over.” John slowly sat up against the wall, rubbing his eyes. 

“I pretty much moved in after freshman year. The, umm, stuff with my brother got worse and yeah. I guess Rose’s mom got tired of me climbing in the window at 3am so she invited me to stay for good.” 

“I’m glad.” John croaked. 

“Huh?” 

“I’m glad that you moved out.” 

“Yeah well it’s not that different. I hope she lets us take time off of school for this though. I mean not like we weren’t skipping math every day to smoke behind the dumpsters but y’know it’s all in the motive. But it’s gonna be pretty crowded with us and then you and Jade and Eva hanging around all the time and all the cats--”

“Who’s Eva?” 

Dave smirked. “Rose’s girlfriend. Can’t go into her room anymore now…” 

“Wait, Rose is gay?” 

“Yeah. We’ve got a lot to catch up on.” 

“Sounds like it.” John had stopped crying. This was the part of Dave he had missed the most, the way he knew just what to do to get John to stop thinking about things. He was easily distracted by chatter, and within three more minutes Dave was pulling him off the floor and leading him out of the bunker. 

Jade and Rose stood outside. Jade reached her hand out, lacing her fingers in John’s. The four of them began walking away. John turned back, looking up at the building he had spent so many hours upon. He would have died up there, eventually. When everyone else was gone. 

Jade tugged on his hand. He turned, an odd feeling in his chest. They walked to the edge of the city, then scaled the gate. The car was waiting just on the other side, Rose pulled out keys and it clicked open. 

John climbed in the backseat next to Jade and turned to face the crumbling city as the engine roared to life. Haven receded slowly into the distance, becoming smaller and smaller until it became just another dark smudge on the horizon. 

He turned around and rolled down the window, crossing his arms over the edge and leaning his head against them. The wind whipped his hair back, the air cool on his face. Jade curled beside him, planting her head in his lap. Rose and Dave sat stoic in the front seat, budding adults, his best friends. 

John smiled softly, then drew his gaze forward.


End file.
